Biff'um Baff'um Boys – "Bombers Over Baghdad" (G-Force Records – YIKES 997T) 1990

Nothing's fucking changed has it?

No its not another posthumous release by Muslimgauze,but some politically aware Rave Techno by a group of persons who clearly grew up on a diet of Industrial Funk, such as Tackhead, 400 Blows,23 Skidoo and the like, along with other spin offs therein...like...er...Muslimgauze?

This could easily be rearranged to read Bombers over Tehran, and hopefully predicts a future of Bombers over the East Wing Ballroom,while a certain Ginger Cunt is surveying the stairways that go nowhere, and rooms you can no longer get into. An errant hi-jacked Bomber with a full payload could do good taste a massive favour by flattening the illegal structure before the Washington DC City council does it them selves.....with, of course, the ginger minger becoming collateral damage like the thousands of children the fucker has on his International Court Of Justice charge sheet along with his Bum Buddy BiBi,who very frankly should be hung on live TV.

Tracklist:

A1 Tarmac Tension
A2 Five Minutes
AA1 Bombing
AA2 Chemical Weapons

DOWNLOAD the friendly bombs HERE!

Various Artists– "Street Sounds-Electro 10" (Street Sounds – ELCST 10) 1985

Did I say Don't Mention The WAR!??

Is this record a warning from History, or did a Hip Hop Nostradamus write these dope lyrics?

"Star Raid" is an obvious reference to ballistic missiles passing through Space in a sub earth orbit raining down on Europe's civilian Infrastructure.....its all so clear to me now.

OMG! aka Oh.My.Allan, we're all gonna DIE.....AGAIN!?

Of course, Allan's radical Hip-Hop Cleric Brother from another mother ,has no father,has no Halo in a coat of many colours. The parthenagenecally created Divine D.J. Born Supreme Allah, is destined to be the Iranian lead monkey to actually press the GO! button that carries all that notorious,hiding, WMD-grade 60% pure Uranium sellotaped to the back of one of those imaginary long range missiles aimed at Diego Garcia, destroying 25% of the US Fleet in the process, and causing enough Fall-Out to bleach the Maldives clean of all foreign interference....for good!

After all,original prophecy-boy himself,D.J. Nostradamus, predicted a 7 month War in the Middle East.....can't see that happening can you?.....then comes the predictions greatest HIT,Rivers of Blood....pull the other one Nosher.....and then....Oh No!..a swarm of Bees....which is an obvious reference to the Drones.....no not the bandwagon jumping Punk group 'The Drones' from Manchester,UK, '77;...i'm talking weaponized Drones here, the ones that have been pummeling everyone east of the Mason-Dixon line, or Poland, since the start of the Ukraine war.

This is all a Proven FACT!......ask Donald Trump, He's known all this since way back before The Trump University started taking students money.

Well, it's gonna Kick Off innit.....OUCH! there goes my bone spurs again!

You better start Praying to his holiness the godlike'D.J. Born Supreme Allah' NOW!....or you will miss out on that coveted Martyrs death and, more importantly those 72 Virgins a martyr entering the kingdom of a christian free Heaven will receive. What happens to those innocent Lady-creatures I dread to imagine.....but Wait a minute!!!!?... aren't Virgins as shit in Bed as you are boys????

Come kindly nukes and rain down death and misery on the Oval Office.

Tracklist:

A1 Tricky Tee– Johnny The Fox
A2 Roxanne Shanté– Bite This
A3 The Dynamic Duo - Ft Knights Of The Turntables
A4 19th Fleet– Star Raid
B1 Run-D.M.C.– Together Forever
B2 M.C. Craig "G"– Transformer
B3 D.J. Born Supreme Allah– Two, Three, Break
B4 Freestyle– Don't Stop The Rock

DOWNLOAD! for the tenth time I said DOWNLOAD!....HERE!

Various Artists - "Street Sounds - Electro 9" ( ELCST 9) 1985

Like hunter gatherers these Crate Diggers scoured the used records section of junk stalls,and thrift stores looking for new breaks from the forgotten failures of the recent past.As if searching for fresh meat beneath the rotting vegetables of a throw away society.

Most junk vinyl has at least one nanosecond of interesting noise to repurpose. And back in the halcyon days before E-fucking-Bay ,sickeningly sussed 'vintage' vinyl peddlers, and fucking Discogs! All this stuff is no longer refreshingly cheap!? One Jazzy album,any Jazzy album,now goes for the price of a Roland TB303. 

Some of these sought after breaks often found themselves bought, or destroyed en masse by 'top' Rap acts and their management (the CIA) if only to stop their rivals getting to them first 

The 'Tech' gear of the early eighties is another accidentally timeless factor in the creation of this nu genre, whom some would suspect was the new Kontrol music created by the security services of the planet. Lets face it, all the Top Rap acts were and are got at by Ep-stain , filmed in flagrente-delicto with a 13 year old girl,which is highly illegal.....like Putin has on Trump, including the Pee-Pee party, where he was pissed on by a Putin supplied sex worker. This is what P-Diddy was doing too by the way.......its all proved...honest.

Well, this early generation of the Hip-Hop epoch, didn't rely on basing their childish rhymes on top of an obvious sample to carry the tune,they spent their spare time emptying the junk shops of rejected solid state Tech that White Guys didn't want, and made it work. The DMX, TR808,third hand Technics turntables and the aforementioned uber squelchy Roland Bassline. Simple but effective,and it made the Kids dance.......bloody Kids!!!

Tracklist:

1 Doug E. Fresh & Get the Fresh Crew– The Show
2 Bad Boys– Bad Boys Ft K-Love
3 D.St.– The Home Of Hip Hop
4 Kid Frost– Terminator
5 World Class Wreckin' Cru– World Class
6 Mantronix– Needle To The Groove
7 Fat Boys– The Fat Boys Are Back
8 Rock Master Scott & The Dynamic Three– The Roof Is On Fire

DOWNLOAD to avoid another invite to a p-diddy pee pee party HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 8"(Street Sounds – ELCST 8) 1985

Don't have much to say about this one, which includes slagging it off, so by elimination this must be a good one?......right?

It's,if anything, a bit Disco-Lite and his slaggo-lettes, with most of the tracks displaying a preposterous preponderance for old school Rapping, lashings of vocoder abuse,early sampler misuse,vinyll-ill treatment and DMX maltreatment with some inappropriate gated digital reverb.

It is certainly of its time,which is why we like it innit?

Tracklist:

A1 Sparky D Vs. The Playgirls– The Battle
A2 Davy DMX– The DMX Will Rock (Rap Mix)
A3 Aleem– Confusion
A4 D.E.F. & D.J. Three D – D.E.F. Momentum
B1 Marley Marl– Marley Marl Scratch
B2 The B Boys– Girls
B3 Papa Austin +The Great Peso– Wrong Girls To Play With (Dub)
B4 N.Y.C. Cutter– D.J. Cuttin

DOWNLOAD keepin' it alive since 1985 HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 7" (Street Sounds – ELCST 7) 1985

Post Elvis,1985 was once looked upon as the official worst year of music evah! Live Aid happened,and the possibilities of world corporate mass control of young peoples personal taste became very real.....meanwhile on the streets of the five boroughs no-one had heard of "We are the World" by the bloated morons of superstars immodest bleatings about saving poor African children like the Gods they thought they were.None of them thought about trying to save the poor american children from Never Land,and a glass or two of 'Jesus Juice'.

Wacko Jacko did,after all, receive the child-like lyrics channeled from God almighty himself, after a suggestion from his Holiness  Lionel Ritchie of course.Well, God can't be good at everything can he?

The Uk's charity single's words weren't much better....so "Tonight Thank God it's Them Instead Of You"...oozed Bozo...i mean Bono.You couldn't make that up!

Now, what the kids on the city street were actually doing,without interference from any Gods, Mortal or otherwise, was filling their empty lives and empty bellies dancing in dat new Breakdancin' stylee.To an abstract version of Kraftwerk and other European synth-pop acts,weaved in with all those Japanese electronic toys that no-one wanted.

No need for Gods, or Poop stars, who feel it worthy of themselves to save us all from ourselves.

"Its a choice we're making, we're saving our own lives!?".....it's all Me Me Me innit? The malignant narcissists of the poop charts; want us poor people to donate to other starving poor people while the brutal dictators of the targeted desert areas of famine, spend it all on new weapons to recruit those very same African children into the Peoples Army.All this goodness, while Lionel and Michael allow us to bathe in their magnanimous and Holy light.

 

Tracklist:

A1 Egyptian Lover - Girls (remix Long Version)
A2 The Unknown DJ– 808 Beats (Club Mix)
A3 Knights Of The Turntables– Fresh Mess (Jam ... Your Radio)
B1 Roxanne Shanté– Queen Of Rox (Shantë Rox On) (Street Version)
B2 The Fearless Four– Dedication
B3 Chris "The Glove" Taylor– Itchiban Scratch
B4 The B-Boys– Stick Up Kid

DOWNLOAD and thank god its them instead of you HERE!

Various Artists– "Street Sounds Electro 6" (Street Sounds – ELCST 6) 1984

 

"The Roxanne Wars", as these call and response rap songs on side one are known as,featuring a 14 year old Female old school Rapper called....you guessed it "Roxanne".She took it on herself to challenge UTFO's hit tune "Roxanne, Roxanne".Of which there were over one hundred response Raps by Herself and various pseudonymous artists.Likely to avoid the authorities causing problems over Roxannes's tender age.Almost a concept albums worth of fem-rap featuring a teenage rapper trying her best to avoid sounding like a kid on Sesame Street doing a rap about the number 'Nine' and the letter 'A'......something I think would enjoy almost as much as her cutesy battles with UTFO.

This one's one of the better releases in the 'Electro' series.

The Rapping doesn't get on yer Titz, plenty vocoder, Human Beat Boxing ,Scratching, gated Reverb, and even some early Bleep-core deep in the mix.

"All the Freaks come out at night" says Whodini......except Roxanne who was too old anyway for Trump,to protect her from Geoffrey Epstein......if you're reading this years later, Epstein was a human trafficker who supplied young ladies for the Rich,Stupid and Powerful,which brought down the Trump administration when some formerly redacted files were found to have photographs of President Trump in Inflagrante delicto with several teenage girls...not Roxanne I'm pleased to say(I Hope anyway!),....and one young boy,who,who was clearly being sodomised by the Orange Monster himself.....cus that's what his Daddy ,Freddie, did to him when he was a little innocent Moron.....as alleged by Donald's Sister Mary Trump.......it's true of course. 

Tracklist:

1. UTFO–Roxanne, Roxanne
2.The Real Roxanne With UTFO–The Real Roxanne
3.Capt. Rock– Cosmic Blast
4.Roxanne Shanté– Roxanne's Revenge
5.Whodini– Freaks Come Out At Night
6.Egyptian Lover– My House (On The Nile)
7.Bobby Broom– Beat Freak
8.Dougé Fresh– Just Having Fun (Do The Beat Box)
9.Dougy Fresh– The Original Human Beat Box

DOWNLOAD for roxanne's green light HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 5" (Street Sounds – ELCST 5)1984)

Unfortunately ,there's too much of that 'old Skool' rapping that sounds like a Caucasian office worker getting down with the groove at the office Christmas Party, not unlike David Brent doing some street dance for charity in The Office...original version. Fusing Flashdance with MC Hammer Shit yeah? (David Brents words not mine!)

But at least its quaint and not the kind of hate speech that passes for Rap during the last three decades.

There be a half decent Arthur Baker tchoon,that's fitting for a former New Order collaborator,it just lack's a Peter Hook.

We also got some proto-turntablism from the Knights of the Turntables for your Dad to shape some breaks to.

Some nonsense from Capt Rock's bordering on Novelty Track status,with more of that Office Party style Rapping again.

Ending with the best track on the whole disk, "B Boys Breakdance" by The High Fidelity Three.

Tracklist:1.Great Peso & Mr. Nasty– It's Time To Rock
2.Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde– Fast Life
3.Knights Of The Turntables– Techno Scratch
4.The Egyptian Lover – Egypt Egypt
5.Arthur Baker– Breakers Revenge
6.Captain Rock– Capt. Rock To The Future Shock
7.Aleem– Release Yourself
8.Fantasy Three– The Buck Stops Here
9.High Fidelity Three– B Boys Breakdance

DOWNLOAD some flashdance and MC Hammer shit HERE!

Various Artists – Street Sounds Electro 4 (Street Sounds – ELCST 4) 1984

Oi! Careful who you calling a sucker you Cheeky Fuckers!

I'll piss on your fucking silly Trilby's 

Run-DMC had the,... not-so....,Bright idea of fusing Hip Hop with white Rock.

At the time (1983) I was blissfully innocent of Aerosmith's existence and the pure liquid evil of their frankly Fucking awful sub-Zep rip off of Led Zep.Who the fuck was that dick breaking through the wall on the set of the "Walk This Way" video. This Cunt was allegedly exceedingly famous on American FM (stands for Fuck me!) radio.Nestling, all cosey-like,in the sweaty armpits of Page and Plant.In between shagging under-age girls,and bumming a few easily impressed male American idiots.

I Humbly apologize to America that four English sex abusers were allowed to come over to your fine land and wreak such unforgivable havoc......er...well....on second thoughts, i'm not sorry at all actually.They can all go Fuck themselves,which they probably do.

Remember this is the land of Harvey Wankstain and Geoffrey Underpant Stain after all.Not forgetting Human Trafficker and honorary american idiotesse Jisslaine Max Swell.....most of whom were arrested for....wait for it....handling Swollen Goods;-)

So RUN-DMC are indeed the inspiration, if inspiration is the appropriate word for the downright blight on humanity for such unholy Hybrids as Funky Metal,Rap Metal,Limp Biscuit and the Bestiality Boys early years...Just think, no Fred Durst!..(sigh)...I hear no apology,or invoking of the fifth amendment right to silence on the grounds that Donald Trump may incriminate himself.. I wish someone had invoked the Right To Silence when Aerosmith came through that cardboard wall back in '86.

Apart from the unfortunate influence of RUN-DMC.....what are they doing on this comp anyway?.....we get three of yer DJ's standard stunts, three times,....yes the MEGAMIX! One of 'em done for us by none other than the godfather's cousin's best mate of Electro himself...Herbie Handoncock.

This one,Electro 4, sounds a tad more charty than the others in the series,but certainly still gets those toes-a-tapping.....if you're drunk enough.

Tracklist:

A1 Steps Ahead– Radio Active 6:45
A2 Pumpkin & The Profile All-Stars–Here Comes That Beat! 6:50
A3 Herbie Hancock– Megamix
DJ Mix [Megamix] – D.ST.
DJ Mix [Megamix] – D.ST. 6:18
B1 Run-DMC– Sucker M.C.'s 3:15
B2 Key-Matic– Breakin' In Space 6:16
B3 The VHB– Beethoven's Fifth (Street) Symphony 7:03
B4 Cybotron– Techno City 6:55

DOWNLOAD wankstain epstain and dorsal vein, solicitors of underage sex HERE!

Various Artists - "Streetsounds Electro 3 (Street Sounds – ELCST 3) 1984

 

More from the Cambrian Oceans of Old Skool Hip Hop,from before they....the Rap-Singers ....regularly called out the Female of this species as "Ho's" and "Bitches".I'm almost done analyzing the role of the Internet in creating this phenomenon of the INCEL in modern day society.

If you didn't know already, INCEL, the acronym, stands for Involuntarily Celibate.These Icel's ,to say the least,don't hold the Sisters in very high regard,mainly for denying them as much sex as they can get,without so much as a 'Thank You young lady. They then blame the ladies for this, and I have a strong suspicion that 21st century Rap Singers are indeed involuntarily and ,yes,...celibate. The cause of this is the unnatural habitat of the Internet ,where these frustrated rappers congregate in facebook groups,and worship such dickweeds as Andrew Tate.They never had this problem in the Old Skool of Rap,they got all the voluntary sex they needed,and as a consequence lacked that modern need for violence, both passive, and  aggressive to prove their manhood through a general display of unbridled Misogyny. None of that shit in the Old Skool......well....not much anyway.....in fact lets just say there was Less of that back in the day.Also a less liberal use of the N-Word.

I suppose we could call this glaring difference between the two 'Rap' epochs, charmingly Innocent,or naive? 

I have little or zero interest in post 1990's Hip-Hop and Rap.Basically it had reached its very low bar for creativity by the mid-90's.Bores the Shit out of me.

Personally, I prefer the tracks that don't have a Rapper...careful how you spell that one. "You've seen 'em,on the top of the pops, the Rapers,you know,you've seen 'em about,down by the multi-story, round the back of the corn exchange?.....the Rapers?......No?"......the Rap Singers.

Tracklist:

1.DivineSounds–Dollar Bill 7:50

2.Imperial Brothers– We Come To Rock 5:03
3.Newcleus– Jam On It 6:57
4.Boogie Boys– Zodiac 6:06
5.Pumpkin– King Of The Beat 4:17
6.Davy DMX– One For The Treble (Fresh) 5:17
7.Fresh 3 MC's– Fresh 5:38

DOWNLOAD some charming naivety with a beat HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 2" (Street Sounds – ELCST 2) 1983

Got some stone cold classix on this one,including the radical re-arrangment of Hip-Hop godfather Herbie Hancock's seminal electro prototype "Rockit"by the B-Boys.You know, the one that MTV refused to play because it had a Black Man in it, so to get around this blatant racism,Team Hancock, made the classic human-less video with the dancing mechanical mannequins.....its a good one albeit slightly disturbing.Hancock himself is restricted to a few appearances on a portable TV stage left.The second black artist to (Not)appear on MTV, following Peado Jackson's "Billie Jean " video.

The samples in "cuttin' Herbie, were suitably subtle,and enjoyed some co-operation with the Herb himself,which cannot be said to be the case with Grandmaster Flash and Melle Mel's "White Lines" which had clear chunks of Liquid Liquid's Cavern used by the Sugar Hill Records house band without proper permission or attribution.Moan as much as they could,the Liquid's must admit if they weren't sampled,royalties paid or not, they would have been long-forgotten today,instead of still touring since they reformed in 2008.

I notce also that Two Sisters also use the Liquid Liquid bassline, no-one seems to be bothered about that particular infringement of copyright law....and so they effing shouldn't!

Its the same argument I have to face regularly for writing this Blog.

I just cannot stand hard done by whinging Musicians,or, even worse, Music 'Fans' of whinging Musicians!Thanks to Hip-Hop culture vast amounts of forgotten and ignored music still lives on(unfortunately so does Aerosmith!),enabling the 'artists' to earn a decent living actually working for a living playing Live.Whinge Whinge Whinge, Fuck Off!

Volume 2 does however contain one of the greatest Electro numbers of the pre-House era in Hashim's "Al-Naafiysh (The Soul)", this rocks the beat enough to open the white boys' ears enough to realise that Electro wasn't invented by New Order, although Blue Monday,is a fine tune,and sold a thousand times more copies than Hashim's influential chunk of electronic grooviness.

Just like MTV,you gotta be pasty faced to get in the Charts.Systemic Racism by proxy.(usually whenever I sound as 'Woke' as this,certain conspiracy nuts and MAGA supporters awake from hibernation to hurl insults and abuse in my general direction.

Ironically "Blue Monday" was where i got off the Joy Division Bus...I thought the fuckers had sold out artistically, as well as shifting thousands of units in a loss making popularity venture.

Allegedly each copy of Blue Monday lost 5p due to the fancy cover.

Silly buggers.

Tracklist:

1.The B Boys– Two, Three, Break 5:01
2.The B Boys– Cuttin' Herbie 4:36
3.Xena– On The Upside 5:53
4.Hashim– Al-Naafiysh (The Soul) 6:06
5.Rammelzee Vs. K-Rob– Beat Bop 10:10
6.Two Sisters– B-Boys Beware (Club Mix) 5:50
7.Grandmaster & Melle Mel–White Lines(Don't Don't Do It)7:33

DOWNLOAD what joy division could have been HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 1" (Street Sounds – ELCST 1) 1983

There ain't nuffink more Do It Yerself than a bunch of black kids in the ghetto with a Boom Box, a turntable, an Oberhiem DMX, a mike for the MC plus some Herbie Hancock and Gary Numan records.

As vinyl was the recognised Electro media of choice,these same kids would have a record pressing plant in their living room,while us whites stuck to the humble cassette......you can't scratch a cassette.

Me being one of those white kids,and from England, who dug Punk Rock and Industrial musick, i never even knew this shit existed,even if Malcolm Maclaren did,somehow(?), make some electro hits in 1983.....I looked down my nose at it all as merely chart fodder innit? It was totally alien to me,especially as it involved ...er...Dancing(?),which was its raison d'etre.

But, one didn't need any instruments to make it? Rather like Old Skool Industrial didn't? Could all this be the afro-american version of Throbbing Gristle? If so why does this Electro stuff sound so fucking joyful, yet the stuff I listened to was so miserable? Are whites really so disconsolate and whinging?..well..yes they,forward slash, we, are??..Hell kick my honky Ass we are,Sheeeeet mother lickers. As a previous Girl Friend suggested that I have No Joy,I'm beginning to think she may have been right?

In the post House era, I began to frequently notice records like this popping up in charity shops,as all the kids were luved-Up on those incredibly dull House style four to the floor beats. The first one i shelled  out 50p for was Electro 2, but it makes sense to start at the beginning does it not?

Lots of Scratching,lashings of Vocoder, under pinned by Akai samplers,and a Roland TR808. What more could you desire tech-wise?

Ah yeah,i should have warned you....there's some very shit Rapping on a few of these tracks,otherwise,instrumentally, its smoking HOT

Tracklist:

A1 The Packman– I'm The Packman (Eat Everything I Can) 6:35
A2 Newcleus– Jam On Revenge (The Wikki-Wikki Song) 7:49
A3 West Street Mob– Break Dancin' - Electric Boogie 5:02
A4 C-Bank– Get Wet7:52
B1 K-9 Corp Featuring Pretty C– Dog Talk 9:35
B2 G-Force – Feel The Force 7:24
B3 Project Future– Ray - Gun - Omics 6:40
B4 Captain Rock– Return Of Captain Rock 8:23

DOWNLOAD and get down HERE!

Napalm Death / Civil Defense – "Punk Is A Rotting Corpse" (Non Label-Bootleg) 1982

 

On the inauguration of the USA as an official Roque state.I feel it fittingly appropriate that one does a vicious rant about the Great Orange mistake itself,but couldn't think of anything Death Metally as an introduction.

So,I thought,hmmmm How about something appropriately fraudulent like a bootlegged Napalm Death fake Demo cassette,without any actual Napalm Death on it,except three tracks by an American Hardcore band no-ones ever heard of....or as Trump would say,a Beautiful american Hardcore band that no-ones ever heard of before"....in this case some fuckers called Civil Defense (note the american spelling). 

An early incarnation of Napalm Death were incidentally also called briefly, Civil Defence (note correct spelling),which is why the fuck up of having three tracks by Civil Defense happened.The bootleggers obviously thought this was Napalm Death? The actual Napalm Death track was stolen from Bullshit Detector 3,and is track 1,the snappily titled "The Crucifixion Of Possessions".

Above all that,the lads from Napalm,never released anything called 

"Punk Is A Rotting Corpse",especially NOT in 1982.

At least we can change the title for our own purposes,and rename it "Trump will be A Rotting Corpse".....hopefully soon eh?

Behold! The festering carcass of American Rot shoved into an ill fitting suit: the sleaze of a con-man, the cowardice of a draft dodger, the gluttony of a parasite, the racism of a klansman, the Sexism of a back alley creep, the ignorance of a bar stool drunk, and the greed of a hedge-fund Ghoul. All spray painted Orange and presented like a prize piggie at a Redneck country fair . Not a president, not even a man or just a mammal,the world's worst human,and the worlds worst Mammal wrapped up in one. Just a vile diseased distillation of everything America says it isn't but always has been and will be forever more.Arrogance dressed up as exceptionalism, stupidity passed off as common sense, cruelty sold as toughness, Greed exalted as ambition, and corruption worshiped like the gospel Donald is so blissfully unaware of.

It's America's darkest shadow made flesh, a rotting pumpkin shaped halloween idol.Proving that when a nation kneels before money power and spite,it doesn't lose its soul, it shits out this bloated obscenity and calls it a leader!?

Tracklist:

1 Napalm Death– The Crucifixion Of Possessions
2 Civil Defense– Don‘t Bother
3 Civil Defense– Enough
4 Civil Defense– Dysfunction

DOWNLOAD this rotting corpse HERE!

Carcass – "Flesh Ripping Sonic Torment" (Self-Released ) 1987

 Ahhh, some Death Metal from the home of the Beatles(Liverpool for gen Z),which sounds like Helter Skelter fed through a cheap distortion pedal and cement mixer......except this ain't Death Metal is it? It's Grindcore innit?

Chief Grinder, Bill Steer, was in Napalm Death for one album....."Scum" I think.So, the relevance of this post was to make a connection between Carcass and the early disemboweling grind of Napalm Death.

However, Bill Steer, was to leave and missed Napalm stalwart Shane Embury joining, like ships in the night,after leaving Warhammer,whom we featured in the previous post.

Most of the musicians....musicians???....in these groups were interchangeable, so no determinable difference was made, and a smooth transition was easily achievable.

The Thesaurus for this entire genre is but a slim volume,concentrating mainly on technical Autopsy references, and different,but the same, forms of putrefaction. Poetry it ain't,but it does convey rotting meat as some kind of alternative Flower representing the horrific ugliness of humankind....an image best represented by a naked Donald Trump....of you can imagine that without losing your mind?

I did also have a pint with Napalm Death,at Leicester University....of course i asked for an autograph for my children,so I provided a Fag Packet and Mick Harris dutifully wrote "Salamanderrrr Autopsy Doss, from Mick Harris". I sold them on Yahoo auctions (remember them?) as part of a package I made up, with The Napalm Death Peel Sessions CD, which skipped like a fucker.....a bit like this tape!? More fun facts>>> This tape was recorded in 22 minutes,but still managed to sound better than the debut album, "Reek Of Putrefaction.

PS isn't "Die in Pain" actually shorter than " You Suffer"? if you remove the count in on drum sticks?

PPS : Check out Stewart Lee on going Orienteering with Naplam Death

Tracklist:

A1 Genital Grinder 1:19
A2 Regurgitation Of Giblets 1:29
A3 Festerday 0:14
A4 Limb From Limb 1:01
A5 Rotten To The Gore 2:51
A6 Excreted Alive 0:56
A7 Malignant Defecation 1:54
A8 Fermenting Innards 2:31
A9 Necro-Cannibal Bloodfeast 1:41
A10 Psychopathologist 1:26
A11 Die In Pain 0:02
A12 Pungent Excruciation 3:01
A13 Face Meltaaargh 1:12

DOWNLOAD your orienteering map with all the boundaries crossed off here!

Warhammer - "Abbatoir of Death" (Self-Released cassette) 1985

 

Future Napalm Death members' short lived but seminal UK Death Metal combo Warhammer ,guide us through a sonic Abbatoir of Death,as opposed to an Abbatoir of happy moo-cows,and fluffy bunnies. 

Meat is Murder,but there ain't nothing nerdier than a bunch of depressed Incels who play ear bleeding variants of the metal genre. One of my recent obsessions is male disambiguation, creating a portmanteau for self-loathing involuntary celibates,who stoop to admiring Misogynist Terrorists and in some cases,when pornography isn't enough, become such a frustrated bum hole as to bludgeon any unfortunate woman who spurns their awkward advances to Death, or in this case Death Metal.

So instead of blaming, objectifying, and denigrating women and girls as a result of their inability to 'pull a bird' some involuntarily celibate young men are now turning to the cathartic cleansing power  of Death Metal noise, which these special unkempt young men,usually metal-heads, can now use to replace anti-fem feelings of repressed hatred with the purging potency of a Heavy Metal variant.

I guess it doesn't help to be an active fan of such a genre that has so very few members of the fairer sex participating within. Maybe try to go a bit Indie, or dancey and you WILL get laid.Leave the Death metal for private moments, in between the wanking.

Tracklist:

A1 Halloween
A2 Blood On Satans Claw
A3 Satans Angel
A4 Carnal Lust
A5 Prophecy
A6 Abattoir Of Death

DOWNLOAD and get hammered HERE!

Various Artists – "One Take No Dubs (Live In The Studio)" (Neat Records – NEAT 25) 1982

A very punky NWOBHM split EP from the vaults of Neat Records up there in Newcastle upon Tyne.It sounds like a Heavy Rocking Eddie and the Hot Rods,crossed with Thin Lizzy,and added Buzzcocks style boasting of no overdubs, as was the case on the unofficial first UKDIY record Spiral Stratch. They did actually do a couple of takes,but owned up to them on the rear of the cover. How many takes did these Geordie Punky Metal Heads need?...why but one apiece , and the electrified urgency is obvious. A crackling maelstrom of high speed Rock'n'Roll, and undoubtedly very stylistically NWOBHM.

Tracklist:

01 Alien – Could Have Done Better
02 Hot 'N' Heavy - Express
03 Black Rose – Knocked Out
04 Hellanbach – All Systems Go (Full Scale Emergency)

DOWNLOAD in one take HERE!

Various Artists – "It's Unheard Of (14 Full Power Heavy Metal / Rock Tracks ...)"- (Sane Records – SANE 002) 1984

A rather more obscure NWOBHM collection from Sane Records,who put out a couple of other sister compilations in their short tenure, one being a Punky effort, and the other a minimal synth classic,both of which are featured on this lovely blog......just click the clicky blue bits and you'll be taken there.

This 14 tracker has a wide cross-section of British metal,leaning towards a poppy orientation.Surprisingly,nothing actually made me laugh until track 12, "Encounter" by Sapphire.The first words of this dreadful Ballad give you a clue,.... "She was my lady",who had unfortunately died some time before of an unrevealed illness...either that or she fell off his Honda C-50 while riding pillion to a Sapphire Gig ,its not clear.The songs timescale isn't obvious and this was his tribute to his dead lover,apparently "She was the only one"....ahhhh,i'm welling up. 

I can see several pairs of spandex tights cladding these very misguided young men with large hairdos.I'm thinking Hair Metal here,or Glam, as we more sensibly called it in the UK.

It gets a bit scratchy towards the end,sorry, but its all in the best possible dodgy taste but largely all good fun

Tracklist:

A1 Incubus – Lost Soul
A2 Runestaff– The Games You Play
A3 Pyramid – Time Forgets A Hero
A4 Avalanche – Night Creeper
A5 Ded Engine– Renegade
A6 Research Dept.,– Mrs. Poe
A7 Hammerhead – Lochinvar
B1 Cry Wolf – Seventh Sister
B2 Shylock – Egypt
B3 Trident – The Power Of The Trident
B4 Nu-Tricx – Cry
B5 Sapphire – Encounter
B6 Kraken – Rat Race
B7 Incubus – Way Of The World

DOWNLOAD to hear the unheard HERE!

Various Artists – "Lead Weight (H.M. Rock Compilation From Neat" (Neat Records) 1981

 

A cassette only compilation from North East England, the official home of Black Metal.....mainly because Venom come from Newcastle and they have a track on this tape; "Angel Dust",which I am playing now as I type,and it seems to go on forever,despite the three minute timing printed on the insert!?...maybe it's their mate Satan fiddling with the space time continuum,the very fabric of time,giving us a small taste of listening to Venom for eternity,but only if you're naughty.

However,naughty or nice, the forty minutes of hard rocking NWOBHM,showcases various influences from Motorhead (thats gotta be  Venom innit?),plenty of poundshop Gillan-esque screaming (Blitzkrieg), and a band (Axis) who seems to want to be Queen?!

All on the legendary Neat Label from Geordie-land.....where that screechy bloke called Brian in the flat cap from AC/DC came from.

Newcastle has a lot to apologise for, especially their underachieving football team which Geordie fans seem to think are entitled as the greatest football team ever,despite achieving pretty much fuck-all in decades of existence. But at least they gave us Venom??.....even The god-awful Toy Dolls are Mackem as they came from neighboring Sunderland,so are not Geordie;but incredibly Sunderland have achieved even less than Newcastle on the football pitch.

Surprise Geordies include such luminaries as Sting, and Brian Ferry.Both very keen to hide their Geordie roots,...and who can blame them?

Eh! Hang on, didn't Penetration, the first NWOBHM band in my opinion  come from Tyne or Wear side? I did a review for the school mag in 1978 on Penetration's "Moving Targets, and dismissed it as Heavy Metal, not Punk. Of course I plagiarized paraphrased copied one of the music weeklies review section for such an outrageous assessment...but it was correct.They had that long haired chap,Fred Purser from Tygers Of Pang Tang in the band at the time,which upped the band skill level uncomfortably high.They were indeed the First New Wave of Britsh Metal band(or was that the Sex Pistols?),sneaking in under the Punk Radar, despite the crackly luminous vinyl it was pressed on.
Tracklist:

Raven – Inquisitor 3:44
White Spirit – Cheetah 4:44
Venom – Angel Dust 2:59
Axe – S.S. Giro 3:10
Blitzkrieg – Inferno 4:59
Aragorn – Noonday 2:55
Fist – Throwing In The Towel 3:40
Axis – Messiah 4:20
Bitches Sin– Down The Road 2:57
Warrior – Flying High 2:46
Satan's Empire– Soldiers Of War 6:50

DOWNLOAD a very neat compilation HERE!

Various Artists – "Roxcalibur"(Guardian Records N' Tapes – GRC 130) 1982

 

If one reads the list of personnel on the dozen or so NWOBHM bands from North Eastern England,featured on this handy compilation, we find a veritable gold mine of Britishness doing British things, with very very British names.

Where would we be without Brian and Gordon Potts of Brands Hatch? Nowhere I wager,or at least somewhere else behind a door that locks from the inside.

Then we have Steve Cabbage, demon of the keyboards for Exodus.Whose keyboard skills made the red sea collapse in itself again.I'm almost 101 percent sure that this isn't his stage nom de Plume; I envisage a hell of a time was had at school with such an unfortunate moniker, he probably even bullied himself.

Trevor Wardle,Mick Howard,Nev Larkin,Bill and Malcolm Midwood,Mick Hedley, and so on, it reads like a list of rejected drummer names for Spinal Tap 3. Virtually zero foreigners  on this very non-exotic list, except for a very disturbing appearance by some teutonic beast called Dieter Roth of....here we go again "Unter Den Linden"....where that came from I know not;but exist it does.Festering among this festival of British blanditude.

Magnolia being the interior decorating of this rocking compilation,it became necessary to make up for it on the outside,as another British pastime that almost defines them as a race, is to Rock out Man!Oh how they do like to party, even if they are called Mick,or Pete,Dave, or Trevor, they all think they are Pop Stars, and raise hell when they can.

Despite another beige christian name,Keith Moon was not the exception,but the rule.

Ahhh poor old Keith, wife beater,alcoholic,drug consumer stupidity beyond any other idiot one cares to mention;but the best bit that godd 'ol Mooney got away with was when he killed his Chauffeur by reversing his Bentley over him while drunk,no licence,no insurance and attempting to escape a gang of Skinheads after starting a fight in a pub!I doubt if any of us reading this unbelievable rock mythology would escape severe punishment for such mindless twollox!

Ha Ha Haaaa,life of the party was Mooney, wasn't he Pete Townsend? Wouldn't catch you doing that would we? Too busy doing "Research" by subscribing to internet kiddie Porn.......he walked free too??!!

Lets face it kids, all of the 60's/70's glitterati were shagging kids,beating up women,even when they were under-age,pushing class A drugs on to innocent entourage members and potential conquests, and ,basically, would be sharing a prison cell with Jimmy Savilles ghost,Rolf Harris,Glitter Johnathan King,that tit from The Lost Prophets, and frankly ,Mojo fans,The Beatles would have been banged up in 1964 if they had the same laws and attitude as today.Their manager was an Epstein after all?

The Heavy Metal acts around 1979/80 would have loved to do the same as their pervy nonce heroes,but no-one gave a shit about 'em, unless they were Iron Maiden, who were too big to get easy sex by playing Heavy Metal.....awww bless 'em.

But, let's not get distracted by our rock gods' orgiastic excess,"Roxcaliber" sounds innocent enough for me to stupidly announce.....announce, NOT, A NONCE!...Twats!

...to Stupidly announce that there are officially NO Nonces on this record.

They probably all work for the BBC now, after being sacked by Harvey WankStain, while Iron Maiden and Saxon are on the next Lolita Express plane to Epstein Island with Donald Trump at the controls.

Slay them with the Sword of Roxcalibur!

Tracklist:

A1 Black Rose – No Point Runnin'
A2 Brands Hatch – Brands Hatch
A3 Battleaxe– Burn This Town
A4 Satan– Oppression
A5 Marauder – Battlefield
A6 Unter Den Linden – Wings Of Night
A7 Skitzofrenik – Exodus
B1 Battleaxe – Battleaxe
B2 Marauder – Woman Of The Night
B3 Black Rose – Ridin' Higher
B4 Unter Den Linden – Man At The Bottom
B5 Skitzofrenik – Keep Right On
B6 Satan– The Executioner
B7 Brands Hatch – No Return

DOWNLOAD metal approved by king Arthur's dumber brother HERE!

Various Artists - "Roksnax" - (Guardian Records N' Tapes – GR C80) 1980

 

Was this label the NWOBHM arm of the Guardian newpaper,otherwise known in the satirical toilet as the Grauniad for its vast talent for misspelling as did Slade once or twice, and that metal band mentioned previously, Panza Division.

The correct spelling aside,which,for the record should have been 'Rock Snacks',The Guardian is now the foremost liberal lefty pinko news source on the planet whom Donald Jennifer Trump undoubtedly  hates viscerally all the lofty pinko's who read the Grauniad . Not that Trump can spell either, or read,or write for that matter,'Guardian Records'N'Tapes' have now sunk without trace,leaving a lengthy legacy that includes  this rather excellent shared NWOBHM  compilation. Hopefully the Orange one will sink without trace one day soon too, leaving only a fluffy yellow wig oozing its way to the surface amidst a small,foul smelling Toxic Orange Slick to further damage the ailing sea life he helped towards extinction.

Whether 'Guardian Records'N'Tapes' was sued out of existence by Trump's legal team because their boss thought it WAS the actual Guardian itself and had it removed for being Nasty Horrible people and terrible journalists, or it simply didn't sell enough copies of the bizarrely named Roksnax compilation.

Who cares why anyway,when one has this rocking fragment still in circulation.

Not a weak track amongst the 9 donated by the three hairy groops from the North East of England that we find being immolated by a cartoon dragon on the rear cover.

This record label,were also in fact responsible for the local band compilation, cheekily called "Compilation N.E.1?"....which thankfully is not a London postcode but just a jokey frolic signifying that this is a band collection from the North East of England,specifically the Sunderland area. This will undoubtedly emerge as a free download here sooner or later to add to the vast Local Compilation section on these here pages of pointless drivel.

As long as The Toy Dolls aren't on there I'll post it here soon.....oh fuking no!?......yes,just checked,they fuking are!? 

Tracklist:

A1 Samurai – Die Or Deliver
A2 Hollow Ground– Rock On
A3 Saracen – Speed Of Sound
A4 Hollow Ground– Fight With The Devil
A5 Samurai – Temptress
A6 Saracen – Fast Living
B1 Hollow Ground– Flying High
B2 Saracen – Feel Just The Same
B3 Samurai)– Knights In Painted Castles

DOWNLOAD and grab a snak HERE!

Various Artists - "Scene Of The Crime" - Suspect Records – SUS 3) 1981

Ok, I know I'm not entirely conversant in the lost language of Heavy Metal,but I am struggling as to comprehend what is exactly occurring on the cover of this NWOBHM compilation.Is that riffing metal-head attacking a Policeman with his guitar? Otherwise known as an "Axe"....lingo borrowed from  beat generation Hip Talk.

The role of the Van is not too clear,but i'm guessing that is assuming the honor of the mythical beast-like metal chariot, the  Tour Bus,and that Copper (Traffic Warden?) is standing in the way of a string of very important Heavy Metal tour dates?

I don't recognize the brand of guitar,so I can't rule out it being one of those cardboard guitars as used in Air Guitar competitions at the Soundhouse?

Now that's cleared up, the first track seems to misspell 'Panzer' as 'Panza',and no they most definitely aren't to be confused with American Noise Rockers Panzey Division....if I spelt that correctly?

Anyway, whats good enough for the Slade is good for the Panza.

Appearing from the smoggy vista's of Sheffield, with fellow misspelling cohorts Def Leppard, their Englishness is revealed by their obvious obsession with World War Two.Apart from the name, the first track they offer up is called "Blitz", which sounds a bit like an amped up Status Quo in places,certainly a heads down no nonsense mindless boogie....and why not?

Savage, do their best Motorhead impression,despite Lemmy insisting that the 'Head' were never Heavy Metal (We're Rock'n'Roll), reminding one of that very argument in the comic Strips' Heavy Metal parody, "Bad News",where the band argue about this very subject:

"I'm not going any further until I hear Alan(Vim) say we're Heavy Metal!"

A line to rival anything in Spinal Tap!

I suppose I'm more like the Jennifer Saunders character, Sally Freidman, Britain's number one hot chick music journalist.(Watch it all Here)

Back to the Good News:

Manatou gives us one of those god awful Hair Metal Ballads to show us all that they, indeed, are not Just a Heavy Metal band (see above),a crime that Tyrant seem far too keen to repeat.

It all sounds like they left the EQ settings alone for the whole album to save time from maybe a 12 hour setting.The same time someone like The Fall would have taken back in the day.

Alas,Heavy Metal,and its New Wave, is at the very least,both hilarious and entertainingly rocking....even the crap tunes to some extent.Especially when its recorded as cheaply as this.

Great Stuff,and a fine still life of British Culture that exists now here else on this planet.......well maybe on some very unusual exoworld after vomiting it through a wormhole......there i go again,Sally From Bad News!?

Tracklist:A1 Panza Division– Blitz 3:30
A2 Manitou – Manitou 3:32
A3 Savage  Let It Loose 4:15
A4 Sparta– Lords Of Time 6:07
B1 Tyrant – Day Of The Knight 3:25
B2 Panza Division – Delta 4 3:34
B3 Savage – Dirty Money 3:45
B4 Tyrant – Sanctuary 3:28
B5 Manitou – Overlord 3:39

DOWNLOAD this good news HERE!