Jr. And His Soulettes – "Psychodelic Sounds" (HMM Records – SH 954-955) 1971

I can only assume that the misspelling is deliberate, otherwise it translates as the sounds of serial killers on drugs.....which is not a bad Band name.....not quite as good as "Drunks with Guns",but that one's taken.

So we've heard Angela the 6 year Old Rapper (aka Talking over a back beat"? Now we got 10 year old Howard M.Moore Jr showing off and captured on self-released vinyl.Backed up by his sisters (The Soulettes)aged 6,7 and 9 years old respectively.

They've obviously been watching the progress of the Jacksons; hopefully minus the abusive parent.Which I'm sad to say was a essential ingredient that created the King of Peado-Pop Wacko Jacko itself.

Junior owes a lot to his sisters one has to say, but he's the oldest so he gets to play Dad's Electric Guitar such are the unwritten patriarchal rules that have suppressed the fairer sex since physics shat out the 4th dimension of Time.

If there was a Talent show anywhere near by, they would have cleaned up.Everybody in the general Public loves a smarmy kid showing off,but whom are actually, very Crap.I'm still haunted by 10 year old Lena Zavoroni on Opportunity Knocks (UK) for 13 consecutive weeks,screeching her way through "Mama He's Making Eyes At Me"(1974),at bullet-proof glass shattering volume. With a song choice that sounds rather inappropriate to these 21st century ears!?...sadly she rapidly developed Anorexia , and died. At least she avoided Jeff Epstein and Donald Trump,who probably wanked his little malodorous mushroom silly watching this clip(link above). 

Exposure to celebrities, or even worse, the 'Public',before 18 should be made illegal.....the bastards!......Fucking Cunting Bastard TWATS!!!

Here's Lena's Radiohead meets Las Vegas Moment:

Check out her PAIN not my pain HERE!

Tracklist:

A1 Thing, Do The Creep
A2 Momma, Love Tequilla
A3 Pimp
A4 Waw-Waw Rock
A5 Love From Above
A6 Flip Will
A7 Do Your Funky Thing
B1 Slow
B2 Sweet Little One
B3 Kewetha
B4 Kat-Walk
B5 Rock 'N Roll Santa
B6 Rock Blues
B7 Pop Junior Pop

DOWNLOAD to wish all child abusing celebrity fuckers a slow death HERE!

Angela Simpson– "Angela" (Spectrum Records – SPEC 5001) 1971

Hey...let's take a short break from Electro Compilations and stray onto the controversial turf of who was the first Rapper person?

Not quite Old School, more like Pre-School Rap, where six year old Angela Simpson out does Roxanne by 8 years to be the youngest Rapper on the block. 

This ain't no Rap I hear you cry,even though there's a track actually called 'Rapping' .....so stuff that in yer pipe and smoke it. Proto-Rap is the category I've crowbared this into.

Who invented 'Rap'anyway? The word is certainly Afro-american, but Ian Dury was a crippled Cockney white-man,and John Cooper Clarke was similar,but Mancunians both, appearing a couple of years before The Sugarhill Gang, and Issac Hayes did some Rap's on the "Black Moses" LP,although they were more of a croon than Rap as we know it. The Last Poets get the prize for inventing Hip-Hop culture,them and Gil Scott Heron I reckon? Big Youth, Prince Far-I, Mark E. Smith....Hell..I dunno what I'm rapping on about really,but I have noticed that it usually takes several individuals to come up with the necessary pieces of the Jigsaw Dunnit!?.....personally....and NO! it wasn't Debbie Harry either!

Anyhow,there's one person who definitely didn't come up with Rap music, and that's Angela Simpson, I'll tell yer That!

Tracklist: 

A1 Angela Simpson– Give The Children A Chance 0:55
A2 Angela Simpson– Little Children Pt. I 2:45
A3 Angela Simpson– Little Children Pt. II 2:45
A4 Angela Simpson– Lenox Ave. 3:15
A5 R. Brown– I Just Want To Be 3:42
B1 Angela Simpson– Rapping 5:00
B2 Angela Simpson– Love Thy Neighbor 4:00
B3 Lily Fields– M-L-K 6:45
B4 R. Brown– Bellwoods Trinity Park 3:12

DOWNLOAD to find out how blondie invented rapping HERE!

Vizerunki Shlyakhiv - "Візерунки Шляхів" (Меlodia – С60-06699-700) 1976

Funky Vizerunki Shlyakhiv was a folky,funky,but very latin sounding, 'Ukrainian vocal-instrumental ensemble',as described in Soviet newspeak, from the lovely city of Kyiv,.....yeah that place we now know is pronounced 'Keev' rather than 'Key-Ev', since they kicked the butt of the Russian invading force/farce earlier this year.
Dunno if any of Vizerunki Shlyakhiv took out any tanks,but they seem to resemble a bunch of handy chaps with State approved Flares to match.I have no doubt that these swarthy Slavs know the right end of a Panzerfaust 3 and how to use it.

There's a Ukrainian Folk tilt given to some of these smoking workouts that would please the local communist commissar bastard,backed up with a song about local commie hero Shcors to ensure no-one got sent for re-education in a Siberian gulag anytime soon.

State Label Melodia has rarely been cooler....which isn't saying much.Unless its referring to temperature of course.

Tracklist:

1. Пісня Про Щорса / Song About Shchors
2. Камінь Сонця / The Sunny Stone
3. Я Люблю Твої Тихі Затоки / I Love Your Backwaters
4. Гуахіра / Guahira
5. Коло Млина Калина / A Guelder Rose Grows By The Mill
6. Марійка / Mariyka
7. Весна I Ти / You And Spring
8. Била Мене Мати / My Mother Beat Me

DOWNLOAD swarthy men in flares HERE!

Ornette Coleman – "Of Human Feelings" (Antilles – AN-2001) 1982

We honkies ain't got the Funk, which when translated literally from the language of 'Jive',means honky don't get the smell of sex brother...just ask Old Gregg.Neither have they got Game, but sport is for persons unnamed who were too muscular for banking, but not stupid enough for the army. Lack of sporting prowess for that pale limbed youth cannot be remedied without a stiff course of illegal Steroids,which will lead to a horrifying case of round shoulders and early death,either that or a damn good bumming from the coach. 

Lack of "Funk" however can be helped somewhat by Ornette Coleman's foray into the world of Funk and Disco called "....Of Human Feelings". Gimmie some of that black creamy milk mother fuckers and move to the groove. On first listen one is struck by its bizarre Elevator music qualities,but that just lures in the casual listener,then infiltrates their reptilian brains with something strictly un-4/4. This is Disco music with a decidedly meandering purpose.A Vaccination against The Bee Gees. Now you can play Disco music without being embarrassed when your trendy chums ask "What the fuck is that you're playing???".....you can reply smugly..."It's Ornette Coleman man"......and still dance to some semblance of a marching beat which is necessary for da white man to express faux-joy of an evening.All after taking the knee of course to express unity with your black brothers.

I know there will be a bunch of Jazzers who think this is the worst Ornette album ever, but they ain't got the Funk have they,you dig?

Tracklist:

A1 Sleep Talk 3:31
A2 Jump Street 4:19
A3 Him And Her 4:15
A4 Air Ship 6:01
B1 What Is The Name Of That Song? 3:56
B2 Job Mob 4:51
B3 Love Words 2:50
B4 Times Square 6:00

DOWNLOAD your feelings onto a hard drive HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Rudyard's" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0839) 2020

Play that funky music white boooooy,was not something previously applied to the most unfunky person that ever made a self-financed CD;but Jandek hooked up with some unlikely early eighties sound alike cabaret funk rhythm section, at "Rudyard's",in his home town of Houston (his first appearence on home turf),and tried earnestly to take dat fonk outside. It ends up sounding like an Arto Lindsey solo album....a very loooooong Arto Lindsey Solo album. As ripped from the DVD version.

There are people out there who have sat through "The complete Funhouse sessions", the massive "On The Corner Sessions" ,the sanity crushing "Merzbox",and even side one of "Bat Out Of Hell 2", but this three hour blue-eyed Funk improv may test even he who foolishly  ventured onto the second side of "Bat Out Of Hell 2"!

You gotta hand it to him,he's certainly hard to pin down these days?

The Drummer on this Outsider Funk torture is called Tyson Sheath....and that's his real name!?

Tracklist:

1 Two O'Clock Sun 2:52:36?

DOWNLOAD to git fonkeh HERE Honkeh!