Various Artists – "When Things Were Perfect" (Peeved Records – PV020) 1985

More Cambridge indie pop via Southampton from a time when things seemed perfect, but on the evidence presented here, wasn't. .....which as i've mentioned several times before is a kind of perfection?

Trouble is, this nostalgia trip very accurately recreates the sound and feel of the black hole that was left behind by the great fizzle out of yer Punk Rock.

There was nothing left to populate the event horizon except a sliding slagheap of middle class studentia playing uneventful Indie-pop...the Uneventful Horizon as one calls it. With only Shoegaze,Twee, and Ron Johnson to assist in the awful choice between C-86 and Acid House.

Tracklist:

A1 The Deviance – The Other Side
A2 The Deviance – Watch It Burn
A3 The Deviance – Frozen Moments
A4 The Deviance – Savage Days
A5 The Deviance – Self Destruction
A6 The Deviance – Happy World
A7 The Children Of Some Tradition– The Last Resort
A8 The Children Of Some Tradition– Town To Town
B1 Perfect Vision– Scratch And Howl
B2 Perfect Vision– Engines
B3 Perfect Vision– Co-Incidence
B4 Perfect Vision– Hole In The Sole
B5 Perfect Vision– Laugh At Breakage
B6 Red Over White– Killed By His Own Tribe
B7 Red Over White– Suffocation
B8 Red Over White– No Shame

DOWNLOAD from when things were far from perfect HERE!

Various Artists – "Tickled Pink" (Peeved Records – PV021) 1986

One of a few Cambridge compilations from Peeved Records, unfathomably based in Southampton?

It kicks off with some mannered Indie Pop by, according to Discogs, one of the 96 other bands called "Spike". If that was out of a hundred it would correlate with the fact that 96% of all bands in the UK sounded exactly like this in 1985 to '86. Marking the era when everyone had a Portastudio, nice equipment,and knew how to use it. As a result everyone sounded the same.

It was all 'well played' ,enhanced with cheaply available effects unit,and they all thought they were gonna 'make it'. The result is really rather dreadful, as they themselves would have found the DIY stuff from earlier in the decade, which these self-tutored pop stars in their own lunchtimes would have scoffed at, and binned off in favor of sounding like Aztec Camera....WRONG!

Its rather like a teenagers painting, when they try their upmost to be a sophisticate;leaving the real genius of their earlier years gathering dust in the garbage bin. Only a few get to make art decent enough to break through to win the poverty that awaits them.

Although missing the point entirely, the end result is actually rather quaint? Awwww, bless 'em.

The High Tech Pagodas win the silliest name prize,and also the best track award....what on earth were they doing?

Tracklist:

A1 Spike – I Feel You
A2 Spike – Any Choice
A3 The Force – Sweet Little Girl
A4 The Force – Crazy Affair
A5 Vanishing Point– From The Heart
A6 Vanishing Point– Face To Face
A7 The High Tech Pagodas– Free
B1 The Lovely– Aniel I Said
B2 The Lovely– Catherine
B3 Strange Brew – Don't Wanna Be Lonely
B4 Strange Brew – Normandy Sunset
B5 Worlds End Band– The Party
B6 Worlds End Band– The Party Of Light
B7 The Lonely – Nervous Hand
B8 The Lonely – Something Happened Today

DOWNLOAD and have your pink bits tickled HERE!

The Lovely Eggs – "Cob Dominos" (Egg – EGG 001) 2011

Yep, People are Twats...it needed saying, and it took professional northerners, the Lovely Eggs, to put this inescapable truth onto vinyl.

Hailing from Lancaster, (the county town of Lancashire,that i was never sure actually existed unless the moon was full) this northern version of John Otway and Wild Willie Barratt obviously have, either, a proper manager or have taken a crash course in 'Rock Management' at Lancaster Polytechnic....just listen to this press release,written by someone who seems to have just read the Bluffers Guide to Punk Rock:

"The Lovely Eggs are an underground punk rock duo from Lancaster, northern England.
They have a fierce punk rock ethos that music should have no rules.
For Holly and David being in a band is a way of life. True to this, they live the way they play. Fiercely, constantly in search of the good times.
With observational and often surreal lyrics about life The Lovely Eggs have a powerful stripped down sound: one vintage guitar amp, one Big Muff distortion pedal, a guitar and a drum kit."

Yeah people are Twats, and being in a band is a way of life, so how's your Punk Rock Ethos this morning? Still Fiercely lookin' for 'the Good Times'? After all, there are no rules in music...except maybe think twice before mixing comedy and music.

Hmmm, comedy music does have a tendency to outstay its welcome after about four jolly amusing numbers, unless you're John Shuttleworth, or Frank Sidebottom,also, incidentally, professional Northerners too?

You know things are wrong when Iggy Pop makes guest appearances on your singles....See the Lovely Eggs' and Ig's 'I Moron' single. And,even worse, once a John Robb interview appears on You Tube you know you've had it.

I'm sure they will be very successful....er fierce punk rock ethos paradox warning....but as funny, or not, as their slightly irritating comedy numbers are, i couldn't play this twice.No matter how charming they seem to be. Mainly its the rent an accent vocals that tend to grate.

Yep People are Twats...including me.

Tracklist:

1 Minibus 1:56
2 People Are Twats 1:16
3 Panic Plants 3:17
4 Print An Imprint 2:11
5 Dont Look At Me (I Dont Like It) 2:55
6 Hey Scraggletooth 4:23
7 Fuck It 3:44
8 Muhammad Ali And His Friends 0:13
9 Why Dont You Like Me? 3:00
10 I'm A Journalist 0:20
11 Books Ting! 0:35
12 Alphabet Song 0:42
13 Watermelons 1:59
14 Pets 0:43
15 Oregon 3:11
16 Real Good Man 2:52
17 Mexico Cant Make You Smile 2:03

DOWNLOAD some dead funeh Manc songs HERE chuck!

The Wilderness Children – "We're A Council House Punk Rock Band ,7"EP" and " Plastic Bag From Tescos 7", " (Doss Records – Reid 1/2) 1989

Purchased mainly for the titles and the DIY collage artwork, this Dundee combo's self-financed singles hint at the fact that so-called 'Indie' was more punk than punk,and certainly less laddy and less rocky,but haunted by the same problems. Most Indie and Punk bands would go on about being...ahem...independent,yet at the same time be signed to contracts with fake Indie labels set up by bastards such as EMI. The moment to take over completely was lost when  Maclaren and Rhodes failed to release Pistols and Clash Records themselves......they would have been millionaires,just as they always wanted to be. There was the 'Spunk' bootleg,the proceeds of which went,like all the rest of the dosh, into Malcolm's back pocket.

This is the proof that total fat cunt Alex Jones msy have been right when he claimed that all artists are asked to “pledge themselves to Lucifer” before signing record deals.
I kid yee not, this bankrupt convicted conspiracy troll,Speaking on his own biblical news channel, His Glory, said that he believes musicians have to “reject Jesus Christ” and “pledge” themselves to the devil before inking deals.

So, as The Wilderness Children clearly had no contract,or any prospect of signing with Rough Trade, this makes them free from Satan Worship,and all you gentle Christian folk out there in internet-land,or more accurately thick fuckers from Kentucky, better get supportin' Jesus H. by pressing up as many copies of "We're A Council House Punk Rock Band" that will fit into eternity.....there are others obviously,Mary Magdalene I hear is a big Danny and the Dressmakers Fan for example...I know because she told me the night I ate mouldy Cheese before beddy byes.

I suppose that the Sex Pistols did,after all, sign to a label that glorifies Parthenogenesis and the virgin birth;except the virgin birth,or births, we refer to, are the endless number of new wave bands that popped out of Virgin Record spontaneously bwteen 1977 and 1979.

One must admit, if I was in a band that was offered a contract under the terms that i had to reject Christ and praise Satan, i would tell them to politely Fuck Off; as I would if they asked me to reject Lucifer, Beelzebub, or whatever other plain daft name they wanna call this fictional child control tool...Child abuse in any sane crack of society,if that exists? 

Praise Jesus,our lard(sic) and saviour Alex Jones thinks he's going to Heaven.Well,If he's there I would gladly burn.....but at least The Widerness Children will be allowed in for Jones to out as Deep State Crisis Actors.

The musick you ask?

The Devil has all the best tunes,but Its fairly standard strummy Indie pop,without pretentions, and seemingly made by the Dundee branch of the Reid Family, brother and sister,as opposed to the East Kilbride Reid twins,who called themselves,Blasphemously ,one may add,The Jesus and Mary Chain.

So maybe The Wilderness Kids aren't so free of his Insidious Majesty Satan J Beast's evil influence as I imagined!? They do have a song called "Go To Hell" i guess?

Hail Satan, I just signed a contract with another internet provider,and yes, there was a box to tick rejecting Christ,and the Devil will get my Soul should I want to switch providers after the introductory period of two years at the cheaper rate.

Well that's me Fucked then!?

"We're A Council House Punk Rock Band ,7"EP":

A1 Mrs Susan Spence
Written-By – Reid, Reid
A2 Go To Hell
B Midsummer's Night Dream
Written-By – Reid, Reid

" Plastic Bag From Tescos 7" :

A Plastic Bag From Tescos
B Bad Taste In My Mouth (Part 1)

DOWNLOAD to reject christ HERE!

The Wedding Present – "Live Tape No. 1 - Leicester Poly 5th May 1987" (self-released C-60) 1987

One's gig-life in 1987 was dictated by the burgeoning C-86 Indie pop shoegazing scene ,so i saw endless groups of that genre,and I was AT this one. I have no memory of it beyond that,except for buying an industrial Hot dog outside the venue aprés-show,which was a dangerous occupation in Leicester at the time,involving various violent episodes involving Burger Vans and axes...."The Hot Dog Wars" as it was titled by investigative journalist knob, Roger Cook,on the Cook report TV show. Joe Perscico (spelling?)the rather frightening head thug, lived opposite my Leicester Poly indie friends,and he coned off the entire street for his Hot-Dog vans...and woe betide anyone who wanted to park outside their home!!!!

Hopefully the Hot-Dog I bought after The Wedding Present gig, wasn't one of his.He's either dead or in Prison now anyway.

I do remember that the venue was approximately half-full,and the very quiet audience reaction was mostly due to the microphones facing the band rather than the students who ,frankly, should have been revising!?

The Poly had a fine bar,with reasonable prices, so I wasn't here for the whole of the performance.

My record purchasing in 1887, didn't really include the C-86 mob, even though Bogshed/Big Flame etc were on that, but erred on the side of Ron Johnson Records and all that American noise Rock stuff,like Big Black etc, who didn't play in Leicester Pubs very often. The only Uk equivalents were stuff like Head Of David,Walking Seeds, and, I suppose, Napalm Death?

Ah Napalm Death, the ones who had a sticker on their first LP proclaiming them as the worlds fastest band?.....surely not?...didn't that accolade belong to The Wedding Present in 1987?

Also strangely, The Wedding Present was one of Steve Albini of Big Black's early "production" jobs? Even though he had never heard of them....'Producer' being a rather too fancy job description for his glorified Sound engineering....Production requires new ideas and a creative input of sorts.Something Steve vehemently shuns in favour of leaving the music to the Band....an attitude that would have robbed us of many classic albums.....eg Joy Division.

The Leicster Polytechnic is now called "De Montfort University", worryingly named after a famous 12th century anti-Semite,Psycopath, former Lord Of Leicester,and Dictator of England, Simon De Montfort;who passed a local law banning Jews from Leicester for all eternity.Apparently this is still on the statute books as I type.

Also, De Montfort university is responsible for taking over the city in an endless quest for huge profits, demolishing several of my favourite Pubs to build new student accommodation;some of which now occupies the site upon which I wanted to scatter my mortal remains,namely Filbert street Football ground. Its not there no more!?...but at least the music venue is still going,although renamed as something else....i dunno wot, doon't live there no more.

Tracklist:

A1 This Boy Can Wait
A2 Everyone Thinks He Looks Daft
A3 All This And More
A4 A Million Miles
A5 You Should Always Keep In Touch With Your Friends
A6 I Regret Everything
A7 Something And Nothing
A8 The Day That This Letter Came
B1 My Favourite Dress
B2 Never Said
B3 Give My Love To Kevin
B4 Go Out And Get 'Em Boy!
B5 Getting Nowhere Fast
B6 Once More

DOWNLOAD the perfect wedding gift for your wife HERE!

Black Tambourine – "Complete Recordings" (Slumberland Records – slr 37) 1999

Shoegaze had so many dimensions, and I suppose this lot are on the Jesus And Mary Chain side of it all.

They sound so English, even JAMC sounded English until they sang, in a decidedly american accent,it's almost embarrassing,except....They,Black Tambourine, areas it turns out, Americans who sing in an English accent??? They had me fooled for several decades,until all this got put on to a compact disc.

I thought they were Scottish!?

Just like the first British Invasion in the 60's ,which spawned a legion of Animals sound-a-likes,and Stones wanna-be's which lurked in Dad's garage...The Nuggets generation,otherwise referred to as 60's Punk.Those Uk Indie imports sounded alien enough for America's teenagers to embrace it, despite the obvious influence of american Group, Third album in Velvet Underground,which apparently didn't have the same effect stateside as it did in the post punk generation in Britain.

There was no American equivalent of the UK Indie underground in 1991 when the Tambourines were about.Depending on whereabouts you lived in the US of A, sounding this drippy but noisy could put your life in danger.Whereas in Britain, it was just a good old honest beating that awaited you if  you came across some Skinheads or some eternal Punks.However, in 1991 they were all 'luvved Up' on 'E',back when the tambourine was a lead instrument.So everyone were, ironically, safe,yes...even attending Football matches???

Therefore, Black Tambourine get the credit for kick starting the US Indie scene...it says here!?

Basically they sound like Psychocandy Jesus and Mary Chain as fronted by a nice twee-enabled Girlie singer.

Tracklist:
1.For Ex-Lovers Only
2.Black Car
3.Pack You Up
4.Can't Explain
5.I Was Wrong
6.Throw Aggi Off The Bridge
7.Drown
8.We Can't Be Friends
9.By Tomorrow
10.Pam's Tan
11.For Ex-Lovers Only (First Demo)
12.Throw Aggi Off The Bridge (First Demo)
13.Heartbeat
14.Lazy Heart
15.Tears Of Joy
16.Dream Baby Dream

DOWNLOAD the band that took the Bore out of tambourine HERE!

St. Christopher – "Bacharach" (Sarah Records – SARAH 403) 1990

I've made this joke before, but i like a good ten incher in my hands,so here's another Sarah Mini album which fulfills the current Twee Dreampop remit,yet also manages to pay Tribute to the recently departed genius of one Mr Burt Bacharach. 'Genius' is a word I try and avoid, but i'm afraid there is no other adjective than can describe Burt's lengthy back catalogue of sheer blinding brilliance-ness. Not many achieve genius status,and i'd be challenging myself to name but a few....i'll take a chance.....Dylan(?).....they must always be referred to by family name only....so for Dylan that must be Zimmerman.....or was that Hitlers real name????.....ah...Shciklegruber wasn't it. That's a jolly fine name for a band of gay twee pop playing skin'eads innit?

Ok, reluctantly, I'm adding McCartney to the list,despite the last 40 dreadful years of his work, he did enough by 1971 to warrant a mention. Ray Davies???.....nah...not good enough, and no-one uses just his surname in reference to the great man,so is automatically rejected to the second tier. Maybe Mozart?....sorry, only limited to 20th century and onward genius's (Collective noun alert!)......he used too many notes anyway.

Not particularly a 'fan' of any of these nominations, but one has to be objective doesn't one?

And NO, Jandek is NOT a Genius!

I've used the rear of this Mini-Album by yee olde York in yorkshire based twee pop combo St. Christopher, because the cover is too garish and offensive to the eye to feature here...the rear is acceptable,so I'll use that.

This jangly bunch of earnest young men get the Digital reverb setting stuck on Large Hall,close to saturation levels as the singer croons in a Pete Wylie-esque fashion,fighting for space with the drums,while the sparkly guitars cut through the fog to restore some focus for us cloth eared bastards at the other end of the XLR cables.

They also use the obligatory reference to the Autumn and Winter winter months that Sarah bands seem obsessed with.

Awww they sad.

TrackList:

A1 A Prayer For The Sea 1:56
A2 The Thrill Of The New 3:14
A3 And I Wonder 2:42
A4 Almost December 2:46
B1 She Can Wait Forever 3:41
B2 Who's Next On Cupid's Hit-List ? 2:34
B3 The Love Of A Sister 2:44
B4 Gabriel 3:01

DOWNLOAD 10 inches of bacharach HERE!

The Driscolls – "Complete Recordings 1988-1991" (Jigsaw – PZL056) 2014

 Also on Tea-Time Records were The Driscolls, whose complete recordings have been so kindly reissued by an American Label, doing that American thing of looking after the UK's culture even if we don't do it ourselves.They owe us big-time anyway as The UK saved Rock'n'Roll for them to enjoy in perpetuity,just as they are saving some of the United Kingdom's Indie heritage....a decidedly untrendy concept in the modern British Isles.

If The Driscolls were transported back in time to The Cavern Club, and The Beatles didn't exist, rather like in that next in a long line of truly terrible Danny Boyle films called "Yesterday", we would know all the words to Driscolls songs nowadays,instead of "Love Me Do". Although they ain't as cute as the Fab Four,so maybe the girlies wouldn't have wet their pants so much when confronted with the wimpy looking Driscolls.....but The Beatles did exist, and The Driscolls are nothing more that a skid mark in history.

The Fab Three....enough to turn a young lady ON...to lesbianism.

What is laid bare the most when listening to these Indie Pop sub-classics, is the glaringly obvious worshiping at the alter of 60's UK Freakbeat and Psych,with a splash of the U.S. Paisley Underground.

Like the Postcard records lot all walked around in public carrying a Dostoevsky Novel for effect, this lot plainly had a trove of Bam- Caruso compilations under their arms at all times in the hostelry's of Bristol and the west country where all these groups seemed to emerge from.

This influence is far from hidden,in fact its flaunted,as their self-financed debut 7" testifies, a cover of The Fire's Psych Pop classic "My Father's Name Was Dad" from '68 rather than '88.....is included here as a vinyl rip.The master tapes long gone.

To cap it all there's a clear Status Quo matchstickable lead guitar riff going on here,alongside a valiant attempt at Beatlesque harmonies.....or maybe it was those bizarre harmonies that The Clash used to insert into their early tunes in between Strummer growling on about Riots and Cheating to win.Silly stuff,but quaint in its own way.

One has to say the dirty clean but chunky yet jangley Guitar sounds on these recordings are rather lovely...that Rickenbacker on the cover may explain this? Although I've yet to receive an explanation as to how groups like this managed to afford a Rickenbacker, or a Fender for that matter? Have you seen how much they are recently....for the disenfranchised kid on the dole they are not!?

PS:

Anyone interested in a movie i'm writing where Gary Numan didn't exist, and i get to come up with "Are Friends Electric"?....that drummer's haircut would have to go though.

Tracklisting:

Disc One:
1-01 Father's Name Is Dad 2:19
1-02 Girl I Want You Back 2:07
1-03 Groovy Little Town 2:15
1-04 Andrew 2:56
1-05 Julie Christie 2:18
1-06 I Heard A Rumour 2:43
1-07 Doctor Good And His Incredible Life Saving Soap 2:28
1-08 If Only 1:54
1-09 Mrs. Jones 2:17
1-10 You Must Be Mad 1:57
1-11 Something To Learn 2:01
1-12 Groovy Little Town (acoustically revisited) 2:18
1-13 This Is A Different Song 2:45
1-14 Bang Goes Another Cloud 1:22
1-15 Out Of My Head 2:58
1-16 How Does It Feel? 4:47
1-17 Superman 3:50
1-18 Sky High 3:53
1-19 The Return Of Lord Kitchener 2:11
1-20 Coloured Windows 3:54
1-21 Brittle Beautiful 3:27
1-22 Green Tambourine 4:01
1-23 Another Day (Little Pill) 4:41

Disc Two:
2-01 P.C. Roberts 1:58
2-02 Call Me Anything 2:13
2-03 Time For Change 2:30
2-04 It's Your Daughter 2:26
2-05 Circles 3:03
2-06 Here It Comes Again 2:53
2-07 These Things 2:59
2-08 Shame About The Rain 3:22
2-09 She Said She Said 3:27
2-10 Coloured Windows (alternate version) 3:51
2-11 X-Ray Eyes (live) 3:40
2-12 radio interview 4:05

DOWNLOAD a group of driscolls with not one driscoll in the line up HERE!

The Field Mice – "Snowball 10" + Singles" (Sarah Records – SARAH 402) 1989

The original Snowflakes and Twee giants The Field Mice,could have been The Stone Roses if they came from some northern ghetto and walked like a bunch of monkey's.

Of course The Stone Roses were obviously Twee shoegazing wannabe's on drugs,rather than sensitive young men and ladie(s) from the stockbroker belt running light on mental issues.

You all know I like a nice mauve ten incher in my hand every now and again,and this one is a classic of the Twee genre,with the occasional rocker tucked in there for good measure.

Even better than this mini-album would have to be the 5 or so singles that came out around the same time,including the rather groovy "Sensitive",which i guess is their signature tune Stone Roses album ender on 45.

Blissfully oblivious of the Madchester nonsense that would eventually kill The Field Mice and shoegaze off,of which,there was a lot about in '89 ,unfortunately;these nice young snowflakes, stuck stubbornly to their post C-86 indie pop and made a bucket full of sweet tunes for us,from a much better time to be alive.....No Internet full of nutjobs,True Patriots,Critical Race Theorists, or impending Facist takeovers or failed coup's back then. Maybe send a copy of this to mark the first anniversary of the Ukraine WAR,(packed with explosives?), to Mad Vlad....he really does need to relax a bit and calm the fuck down!? I'm really worried about the Cunts mental health....Honest.

"Snowball 10"er):

1.Let's Kiss And Make Up 6:12

2.You're Kidding Aren't You? 2:30

3.End Of The Affair 4:14

4.Couldn't Feel Safer 3:47

5.This Love Is Not Wrong 3:21

6.Everything About You 2:30

7.White 4:48

8.Letting Go 6:33

Singles:

9.Sensitive 5:04

10.When Morning Comes To Town 5:14

11.Emma's House 3:37

12.When You Sleep 3:32

13.Fabulous Friend 2:53

14..The Last Letter 2:46

15.I Can See Myself Alone Forever 5:20

16.Everything About You 2:21

17.That's All This Is 3:16

DOWNLOAD and bring the mice inside for the winter HERE!