Portsmouth Sinfonia ‎– "20 Classic Rock Classics" (Philips ‎– 9109 231) 1979

Released in the same year as Throbbing Gristle's "20 Jazz Funk Greats", the Gavin Bryars and Brian Eno-less Portsmouth Sinfonia's "20 Classic Rock Classics" probably had the same result, as in luring the wrong kind of person to buy this uncomfortable music by mistake.
Whereas the Jazz Funk enthusiast would have been appalled at Throbbing Gristle's challenging non-musick, the  average easy listening punter was certainly more likely to accept 20 Classic Rock Classics as just the badly  played real thing.
I'm sure you are now familiar with the original concept of mixing musicians with non-musicians playing instruments they were unfamiliar with;A noble attempt to free music up for the masses & get to the heart of popular composition.
Whereas the first two albums,which focused on Classical music, were far more upbeat and joyful,this one,lacking the guidence of originator Gavin Bryars,and the cred of Brian Eno (who no doubt had better things to do by 1979?),they come across a little melancholic and dismal sounding, like a bad community band unfortunately captured on record whilst the air is let out of them.
It lacks that atonality,and the joke wears rather thin by the time we get to the best track,the Stones' "Satisfaction".
Nonetheless, this gives the rock and pop dinosaurs,not so much a kick,but a mild slap of the testicles.Truly in keeping with the Punk era's intended Raison d'Etre.
Its like an almost capable school orchestra playing James Last,but without that famous James Last,ist funky ja, rhythm section.
Somewhat disappointing.

Tracklist:

1.Pinball Wizard
2.Apache
3.Leader Of The Pack
4.A Whiter Shade Of Pale
5.You Really Got Me
6.Uptown Top Ranking
7.Glad All Over
8.Heartbreak Hotel
9.Telstar

10.Bridge Over Troubled Water
11.Nut Rocker
12.Don´t Cry For Me Argentina
13.(We´re Gonna) Rock Around The Clock
14.You Should Be Dancing
15.It´s Only Make Believe
16.Nights In White Satin
17.My Boy Lollipop
18.God Only Knows
19.(I Can´t Get No) Satisfaction
20.A Day In The Life

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Portsmouth Sinfonia ‎– "Hallelujah - The Portsmouth Sinfonia at the Royal Albert Hall" (Transatlantic Records ‎– TRA 285) 1974

 "Without the arts and sciences,and without music especially,life would be a dreadful mistake.Music begets happiness,and music begets peace;and its through peace that we arrive at the truth and goodness which makes life meaningful and unveils its highest values." (Michael Bond 1974)

I couldn't have put it better myself, maybe missing a few expletives, but essentially, therein, lies the meaning of life.
I've mentioned the sheer Joy this music can invoke in even the most miserable of old sods,and thats some kind of inexplicable magick, is it not?(Check out the first audience-less album Here!)
I have sat through an hour or so of  some unremembered classical renditions surrounded by a sparse audience of the self-elected elite,in their best bib and tucker, frowning at the musicians,while i was stifling yawns. For one it wasn't fucking loud enough,and as far as i could see they were just playing the notes,which is only 10% of any music.No Magick.......(yeah I know....there are classical musicians who do have the 'magick',but not where i live there ain't!)
The main theme of this project was to make this music 'inclusive' rather than exclusive,for everyone rather than just the 'Elite'.A more popularist,less uptight, version of assasinated avant-garde composer Cornelius Cardew's  'Scratch Constitution', for musicians and non-musicians alike, which was basically a recipe for controlled anarchy, written by Cardew and published in the Musical Times in June 1969. Its aim was to bring music out of the ivory tower and to involve large numbers of untrained people in making music.Very similar to the Sinfonia and the effect Punk Rock had on Rock and Pop music.
When Wagner's Ring is being performed, there's never enough laughter from the audience.Lets be honest, most of Wagners work is as patently ridiculous as any comedy music,however deadpan it is.If there were laughter or sniggering of any sort, the perp's would be first the victim of agressive 'Shushing", (there's even an audible 'Shhhhhhh!' from an audience member on this recording?), and futher inflagrations would result in their expulsion on the end of a door operatives shiny jackboot.
Never forget there were classical orchestra's at all the Operation Reinhard camps and in every Ghetto under arch-wagner uberfans, the Nazi's.If there was a Treblinka Sinfonia, I have mass grave doubts they would have been allowed to finish the first section of 'Ride of the Valkyries' before they were bundled into the nearest poison gas facility......theoretically anyway,as the jury is now officially out as to whether there were any gas chambers at all,or even a camp at Treblinka......but,if there was,please let there have been an equivalent to the Portsmouth Sinfonia sheparding the victims joyfully to meet the choir invisible;and may the Choir Invisible be somewhere near approaching the skill levels of the Portsmouth Sinfonia Choir doing Handel's Messiah. What a way to enter heaven!? Maybe the prospect of eternal paradise isn't so boring after all?
I'd love to hear The Portsmouth Sinfonia do a version of "The Sinking Of The Titanic" by the man who started all this madness, Mr Gavin Bryars. I can just imagine the doomed proles in steerage being consumed by the icy black waters, laughing hysterically as the Titanic Sinfonia played an atonal version of 'Nearer my Lord to Thee' as they joyfully gulped down their last breath.
Apparently Drowning causes a feeling of euphoria as your brain shuts down.We just need something for that transition period when one is inhaling the brine.......we now have the answer.

Music is Joy,and Joy is life and life, can be, forever?
The eternal NOW!

Tracklist:

1.Mr. Michael Bond's Address 1:05
2.From The Nutcracker Suite, Op. 71a - March 1:57
3.From The Karelia Suite, Op.11 - Intermezzo 3:54
4.Marche Militaire In D Major 5:33
5.Piano Concerto No. 1 In B♭ Minor, Op. 23 10:38
6.Overture 1812 10:28
7.William Tell Overture 2:21
8.From The Messiah, Pt. 2 - Hallelujah Chorus 6:02

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Portsmouth Sinfonia ‎– "Portsmouth Sinfonia Plays The Popular Classics" (Transatlantic Records ‎– TRA 275) 1973

Most of the Obscure Records mob could be found on this album by
the self-proclaimed "world's worst orchestra",there were in fact many much worse,or few better,The Portsmouth Sinfonia.Which was founded by Gavin Bryars of "Jesus' Blood" fame, in 1970, when he was lecturing at the Portsmouth School of Art....hence the Portsmouth bit.
Bryars wanted to engage the masses,thats 'us' by the way, with classical music,largely thought previously to be fucking boring by the target audience, and sought a way to liberate the form from the pomposity of its largely stuck-up Toff heavy audience. His idea was to form an orchestra of the 'people'....er that's still us by the way,.....I don't feel patronised, do you?.... Anyone could join, regardless of skill,even you!?
The orchestra comprised of known musicians,which included most of the UK avant-garde crew,as well as Brian Eno (clarinet), playing instruments they had no previous knowledge of. Virtuoso players and ordinary-ish folk who had never played an instrument in their lives,played side by side.The music would be played by ear so no sight-reading skills were therefore required. The virtuoso players kept everything vaguely within the realms of what might be called a tune, with the other players reaching for (and missing) notes nearby. The result was a fascinating atonal mess, a noise which was considered profound by several of Bryars classical contemporaries.

They sound not unlike a school orchestra,hiting that mysterious tone that compells one to laugh uncontrollably no matter how many times you hear it. I was once a witness to my nephew's school orchestra,he was one of the violinists,and as soon as the first few notes rebounded off the walls like Freddie Kruger's fingers sliding down a blackboard, me and my Girlfriend had unstoppable hysterics.The proud parents that surrounded us displayed a mixture of disgust,awkward acceptance,and slight annoyance....i just couldn't stop! Amid the giggling i managed to explain the joy i was feeling as tears streamed down my face,and that it was nothing to do with the awfulness of the playing.It was the sheer charm and innocence of it all.....it was JOY that we were expressing.....JOY...understand?

Although this project had an interesting central concept,it quickly caught the public's attention as strictly a comedy turn.

As the personel included most of The Scratch Orchestra,and AMM,as well as Eno and Steve Beresford among others, this certainly had plenty of serious experimental musicians involved.

Somehow, I can't imagine the equivalent happening in the contemporary classical/minimalist scene in the United States.In the UK one cannot be seen,or heard, to be taking oneself too seriously,and always have the obligation to make fun of ourselves.....even the Avant-Garde ones.

The Bonus track, "Classical Muddley" is a parody of those 'Hooked on Classics' records which also tried to introduce 'the Classics', to the great unwashed proletariat by placing a disco beat behind a mix of popular classical works. Us factory fodder types were obviously too thick to appreciate the finer things in life without a bit of dumbing down.

The results of this experiment led to the Portsmouth Sinfonia's records being pitched at the comedy market which earned them a cult following, enough for them to be selling out the Royal Albert Hall by 1974!?

Tracklist:

1.From Peer Gynt Suite No. 1:"Morning" 3:23
2.From Peer Gynt Suite No. 1:"In The Hall Of The Mountain King" 3:00
3.From The Nutcracker Suite:"Dance Of The Sugar Plum Fairy" 2:18

4.From The Nutcracker Suite:"Waltz Of The Flowers" 4:05
5.Fifth Symphony In C Minor, Op. 67 6:18
6.William Tell Overture 2:00
7."Also Sprach Zarathustra" Op. 31 (Excerpt) 2:06
8.Blue Danube Waltz Op. 314 4:36
9."Air" From Suite No. 3 In D Major 4:37
10."Farandole" From L'Arlesienne Suite No. 2 4:05
11."Jupiter" From The Planets, Op. 32 (Excerpt) 4:28

Bonus Track:

12. "Classical Muddley" 3:19

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