Steve Beresford /Jon Rose / John Russell / Tony Wren – "Luton - Center Of The Universe" (Fringe Benefit Records – FBR 33) 1981

 

Having proved that there is a super-massive Black Hole at the center of our galaxy;Top scientists are yet to prove that Luton is at the center of anything,let alone the universe.As one of the most drab and uninspiring of London satellite towns,and home to one of thee worst football grounds ,possibly in the entire universe,the place would be greatly improved by being swallowed by a black hole and compacted to infinite density.

Although ,Luton was indeed close to the center of the improvising universe for at least two evenings early in 1981,when Steve Beresford and chums hit town,witnessed by what sounded like,going on the sparse applause,approximately 8 and a half punters,but no dog.....he didn't turn up! Or, better still a room full of paying customers,including one dog, who sat in silence,or left,during the performance,leaving the eight and a half strong Luton intelligentsia to applaud wildly in a largely empty room. This C-60 being the only evidence that this actually happened.....or did it?

These free improvisations have all those essential monkey's tea party qualities that would normally empty any size room of consenting adults within minutes and provoke many a ruddy faced jingoist into enraged foot stamping threats of violence.In which case I could't recommend it more. 

Tracklist:
A January 20, 1981 31:03
B February 6, 1981 25:38

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Steve Beresford /Tristan Honsinger/ Toshinori Kondo / David Toop – "Imitation Of Life" (Y Records – Y 13) 1982

Having been seen doing the donkey-work for the Slits it was inevitable that Steve Beresford would get some product on trendy Pop group connected label, 'Y Records' ,as owned by Pop Group/Slits manager Dick O'Dell. So, Steve and his weird London chums got to do a couple of Lp's of their spontaneous scraping toy instrument and Tuba madness to sit alongside the funky fayre of the Bristolian Illuminati. Unlike label mates Maximum Joy*,Poop Groop, and other suspected Trustfund surfers,there is not one ounce of 'Funk' on Steve's record ,which hardly even has a time signature.It does have however,four very unfashionable people living in four different but related worlds,playing different tunes at the same time.

NB...Maximum Joy threw a mardy*......

*Mardy Arse :(noun) INFORMAL•NORTHERN ENGLISH
a sulky, petulant, or grumpy person.

......about being featured on Die or DIY?,and demanded...yes...demanded(?)  that their work.....did they say 'Work'?,apparently ,yes?...be withdrawn.....so you can't find these suspected suburban  middle  class George Clintons haunting these pages no more.;...but you can,ironically, on YouTube,work that one out......or as Steve Beresford calls it, YouTuba! (ha ha ha)....i suspect it was Dick 0'Dell (who produced this funnily enuff!) wot done it,not the groop.Groops don't do shit like that,unless you're the remaining members of Throbbing Gristle,Cabaret Voltaire,Whitehouse,or Zoviet France?...There seems to be a theme there.....only Industrial Bands are wankers it seems.

Anyway fuck the fuckers and their honkyfied white mans funk, And how dare they share the same label as Sun Ra....yeah I'm a trendy too?Didn't you know?...how Dicky dingleberry O'Dell wangled that I dunno?

Well, at least Y Records have an ex-XTC member (barry) on their rostrum;...yeah,post-punk super group Shriekback's entire fun-filled oeuvre appears there.......not listened much to it however,,only that first single about a spine being a bassline or sum'ting equally cool,as in cool with a capital 'I'...don't care. Nah!

But, Beresford can't do anything wrong to this proudly closed mind,I just don't like Trendy's who'll reveal their under arm portable jazz collection before you can say Thelonius Monk;arranged in chronological order of course;the More Jazz than You Nerd off......yeah yeah I know.....I'm "Pure Scum" etc etc....! for stealing the royalties from these hard working bands blah blah......I wish I could get royalties from work I did 40 years ago, or sell copies of the same work again and again...and incredibly, no-one complains???

Tracklist:

A Whoosshh 21:16
B Please - Thanks That's Alright 17:34

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Three & Four Pullovers - "Three & Four Pullovers (1975-8)" - (Emanem – 4038) 2000

What were you doing in 1975? 

I was enduring the transition from primary education to take my place in the final year that Grammer Schools existed in the UK.Soon to be phased out because the Labour Government thought it 'Elitest', Unlike the government? Shirley Williams was the Secretary of Education,who had the non-elitest luck to have been evacuated to California in World war 2, along with her mate Elisabeth Taylor.They both tried out for the lead role in National Velvet.....and guess who won? That's right, Not Shirley Williams,who channeled this bitterness to fuck up intelligent kid's education prospects with her 'socialist' values,which, as far as i could see, were designed to keep the working class in their place,as factory and family fodder.

So in between being beaten up at school by the older kids,....us being the last years intake....we would never get the chance to beat up the younger kids,so we were doomed to be the youngest kids for the entire 5 years.

Then, carrying the stigma of being a Grammar school kid on a council estate, I was beaten up on my home turf too.For some reason being classed as intelligent means that you are 'Posh' according to my peers,who named me "Posh Cunt" before the kicks tained in....that's elitism for you alright.Pablo Picasso never got called an Asshole...but we did. 

In between kickings, I spent my time listening to such unadulterated rubbish as Queen, Status Quo,Dr Feelgood,Thin Lizzy, The Sweet,The Glitter Band....etc....you get the picture? With pretensions towards Prog.

Meanwhile Steve Beresford and his London Music Collective chums Nigel Coombes and Roger Smith were making ,such crazed improvised tomfoolery as "Three Pullovers".....(later expanded to "Four Pullovers" whenever Terry Day bothered to turn up).

What would have been rather splendid,was if Thin Lizzy played a version of "The Sea Of Mice" by Three Pullovers as an encore at one of their proto-NWOBHM gigs,even though Sweet were far more metal than them.The mid-size college arena would have emptied in record time...well, either that or a Riot.

 The Glitter Band are excused,as their Guitar sound was probably the most avant garde statement in the whole Glam scene. Dr Feelgood were living art however, but The Quo could have at least finished their 'Blue For You' album with some Free Improv to totally piss off their denim clad,and 100% male audience.....this could have been lauded as another one of those, sadly stupid "Punk before Punk" moments. The fantasy of the late Rick Parfitt whipping out the toy glockenspiel would have made for a most tantalizing prospect.

Its the Toys that make the Noise.

 DOWNLOAD and pullover HERE!

Steve Beresford – "The Bath Of Surprise" (Piano – Piano 003) 1980

Remember all those Slits Gigs you went to in 1980?There was always a geeky bespectacled bloke in the background who made the whole thing stick together.That was Steve Beresford. (see if you can spot him in this Clip,like a post-punk version of 'Where's wally'.).

Apart from making The Slits a slightly more musical offering, there's a vast array of projects that can boast the presence of one of the London Musician's Collective most prolific members.If it made a noise Steve would play it.And he'd do it for countless groups from The Frank Chickens,49 Americans,Flying Lizards,and The Portsmouth Symphonia,to the Hard core of the UK Improvising scene,Derek Bailey,Han Benninck,and Evan Parker.He was in at the deep end,and still is.

This was Steven's debut solo album,as produced and released by DIY Avant-gardist David Cunningham,who was better known as the Flying Lizards,and the man who released and produced This Heat's early records.A seemingly perfect track record?

What are you gonna get on this record? Well,you don't know do you,it's improvised.....the unexpected...I expect?...BUT...having played it to see whats on it, i can tell you everything from toys to tuba's to scraping noises are there...which i suppose is to be expected.... if, you know your free improvisation.If you don't, cleanse yourself in the bath of surprise.

Tracklist:

1 Punctuation
2 Lieutenant Dub
3 Cat Picture
4 What Is A Thing
5 The Bath Of Surprise
6 Concealed Entrance
7 My Old Piano
8 Burning Problems
9 Schlussakord
10 Those Oldies But Goodies Remind Me Of You
11 A Cup Of Tea And A Bun
12 Mr & Mrs. Wu
13 Spring Clips
14 A Continuous Supply Of History

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Alterations – "Up Your Sleeve" (Quartz Publications – !QUARTZ 006) 1980

I said i'd post this in response to a request....which is handy so we can move on from the Synth-Punk thread one was in danger of weaving.Like an escape from Rapunzel's tower,.....did I tell you all about the nutjob in Leicester who built a replica of Rapunzel's Tower in his back garden,as a disguised entrance to his nuclear bunker;fully stocked with cans of Heinz Baked beans and Coke...original flavour of course! Oh How we laughed!?....until now,as he looks like the sane one,and we are in danger of getting irradiated by a nuclear Tidal wave. I didn't ask if the entrance to Rapunzels' Bunker was water tight?I assume it is.

Alas, fear Not, for the Russian threat is but mere fantasy,as there were several under water H-Bomb tests in the fifties,and lo and behold....no Tsunami. Just like all their other 'super-weapons.....they're running out of processing chips.Oh How we Laughed....hang on, haven't i said that before?

There's a Door and the Window reference in there, (I Feel Like a Doris),so this must be something to do with the London Musicians' Collective....which of course it is.It's got David Toop and Steve Beresford on it from the more lauded end of the LMC. 

These chaps were taken seriously,but never by themselves.

If you're an open minded individual, as a rapidly decreasing percentage of the populous is year on year,this non-music is a pure expression of freedom,and anyone who doesn't like it can leave the room,which they would certainly do if encountered in the wrong environment. This is the kind of degenerate art that Putin will be issuing death sentences for in a few years,in the post nuclear wasteland that was once known as the Russian Federation.

The tune "Party Political" by this LMC sooper groop,is,lyrically, thee best most incisive dissection of the Political zeitgeist I have ever heard.....read these words as a manifesto for freedom :

"Don't Listen to Electrical Wholesalers,

Don't Listen to Greengrocers,

Reject their Ideology,

Don't Listen to Wholesale Greengrocers,

Don't Listen to TV Repair people.

REJECT THEM!"

Can't argue against all that...except that TV repair people no longer exist,as buying a new TV is far cheaper than getting it fixed.But all essentially true.

Tracklist:

A.1. He Feels Like A Doris Day
A.2. Trail Of Traps
A.3. The Life And Opinion Of Masseur Ichi

B.1. Not So Dumb Deaf And Mute Heroine
B.2. Fear Of Mayonnaise
B.3. Stand By Your Sheep
B.4. Party Political

DOWNLOAD from their sleeves to yours HERE!

The 49 Americans ‎– "Too Young To Be Ideal!" (Choo Choo Train Records ‎– CHUG 2) 1980

Blimey! In the space of less than a year the next 49 Americans EP cost a whole One Pound and fourteen new pence more than the first one. Now's thats galloping inflation on a Zimbabwean scale!?

And what do you get for your extra expenditure? 

A lousy extra six minutes of The 49 Americans in action!

The cover states that this is a Twelve-Inch Single......so its the extra five inches of plastic that gets the blame for the increase in entry fees is it? And I thought these guys were a bunch of communists?

Can't trust anyone these days,even back in the 1980's it seems?

Well before Facebook and post-truth we had Post-Punk.So if we applied the same criteria as applied to alternative facts, that means that Post-Punk is actually Punk that wasn't Punk......it's all so clear to me now.At the time I thught all Punk was Punk,and that, there being a time when the term Post-Punk had yet to be coined,I thought stuff like Gang Of Four, The Pop Group,and Wire were actually 'Punk'.Then some bright spark Journalist,either Jon Savage or Paul Morely, came up with this pigeon hole around 1980-ish,meaning bands who didn't sound like The Ramones or look like The UK Subs;when before the term used to mean everything after 1976.

The first genuinely Post-Punk bands were stuff like Siouxsie and The Banshees,Wire,and PiL;but bizarrely there were Post-Punk bands before Punk too,like Pere Ubu,and Talking Heads...proto-post-punk anyone?

This is the true spirit of Punk Wok, moving forward,striving to be an individual,and not being a UK Sub doing 'Stranglehold' for the upteenth time in your seventies.

Punk Wok is The 49 Americans,doing it yourself,and not copying the Womones and the Thex Pithtols, that's....Wunk Pock.....as in the last post I used a 'Palindrome'event,now is the chance for me to use a Spoonerism.....and I'll do it again,watch....Wunk Pock. Ta Daaah!

I'm too old to be an Idealist!

Tracklist:

A1 Theme
A2 Woe Ballad
A3 Yucky Nightclub Job
A4 Love At First Sight
A5 Don't Sing The Blues
B1 I'll Make You A Star
B2 Love Has Solved My Problems
B3 Successful Wonder Glory / Success Turns Sour
B4 Big Decision
B5 Should Be More Ideal

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The 49 Americans ‎– "The Hit Album" (NB Records ‎– NB 4) 1980

Radio Free Europe may have asserted that 'All Americans Are The Same', but there were at least 49 of their compatriots who were certainly NOT the same......mainly because 48 of them were made of pasty faced English wimps,the types who'd get sand kicked in their collective faces by those real American boys who all look like Henry Rollins, while berating them as a bunch of Fags. Which of course, in England-land is a packet of Cigarettes,or ciggies. 'Fag' was also a Public School term,used by the sixth form,for their 1st year servant boy,who would invariably end up being abused violently and sexually by their adolescent masters. ...."Come here Blenkensopp,I'm going to give you a damn good bumming,you snivelling little Turd!"

This is what the British Empire was built on,alongside Tea, and a leaky raft of 'Good Intentions';and we all know the road to hell is paved with these good intentions"(C.S.Lewis)...don't we? 

A deadly accurate portrayal of British Public school life can be viewed here,Episode 1 of "Ripping Yarns"...."Tompkinson's School Days"

Using Rape as a weapon is the time honoured way of creating generation after generation of traumatized and suggestable future leaders.Most of the British Govenment have been through it....I mean just look at Boris Johnson!?......its a system that seems to work,keeping everything just fucked up enough to function, yet dangle a distant unattainable carrot of hope to aspire to,dangling on the far side of the pit of dispair. I'd love to know for whom Johnson fagged for at Eton,he does,after all come from 'New Money',so he probably got an extra special bumming in the 'Boot Room' at Eaton.

You Americans don't know how good you've got it....yep, it's that bad!

The 49 Americans were recruited from the J-Arthur ranks of the London Musicians Collective by the sole American in the group, ex-pat Andrew "Giblet" Brenner.This included such improv luminaries as David Toop, Steve Beresford, Max Eastley, Lol Coxhill and Peter Cusack, as well as Nag and Bendle of The Door And The Window ,Vivien Goldman and 'Slit' Viv Albertine (I somehow doubt that her time with 49 Americans will make it into the proposed cinema biopic of her life).

This amateurish, no-fi, non-pop...er...pop(?), is about as far as one can get from a standard rollicking,rocking,or Rawking, American Group as you can get.All that for 85 new-pence,with each mini-symphony lasting 58 seconds, which is a numerical palindrome of 85.Those krazzee kidz!

Tracklist:

U.S.A. Side:
A1 American Wonder Song 0:58
A2 Newton's Law's 0:58
A3 What We Want 0:58
A4 Gail Was A Victim 0:58
A5 Move Around All Day 0:58
A6 Is This Rock And Roll? 0:58
A7 Julie Andrews (A Tribute) 0:58
U.S.B Side:
B1 One Germ 0:58
B2 Intelectuals On Parade 0:58
B3 Pigs 0:58
B4 The Uncertainty Principle 0:58
B5 Architecture Stops 0:58
B6 Missionairies 0:58
B7 Stupid Boy 0:58

DOWNLOAD all the hits HERE!

Portsmouth Sinfonia ‎– "Portsmouth Sinfonia Plays The Popular Classics" (Transatlantic Records ‎– TRA 275) 1973

Most of the Obscure Records mob could be found on this album by
the self-proclaimed "world's worst orchestra",there were in fact many much worse,or few better,The Portsmouth Sinfonia.Which was founded by Gavin Bryars of "Jesus' Blood" fame, in 1970, when he was lecturing at the Portsmouth School of Art....hence the Portsmouth bit.
Bryars wanted to engage the masses,thats 'us' by the way, with classical music,largely thought previously to be fucking boring by the target audience, and sought a way to liberate the form from the pomposity of its largely stuck-up Toff heavy audience. His idea was to form an orchestra of the 'people'....er that's still us by the way,.....I don't feel patronised, do you?.... Anyone could join, regardless of skill,even you!?
The orchestra comprised of known musicians,which included most of the UK avant-garde crew,as well as Brian Eno (clarinet), playing instruments they had no previous knowledge of. Virtuoso players and ordinary-ish folk who had never played an instrument in their lives,played side by side.The music would be played by ear so no sight-reading skills were therefore required. The virtuoso players kept everything vaguely within the realms of what might be called a tune, with the other players reaching for (and missing) notes nearby. The result was a fascinating atonal mess, a noise which was considered profound by several of Bryars classical contemporaries.

They sound not unlike a school orchestra,hiting that mysterious tone that compells one to laugh uncontrollably no matter how many times you hear it. I was once a witness to my nephew's school orchestra,he was one of the violinists,and as soon as the first few notes rebounded off the walls like Freddie Kruger's fingers sliding down a blackboard, me and my Girlfriend had unstoppable hysterics.The proud parents that surrounded us displayed a mixture of disgust,awkward acceptance,and slight annoyance....i just couldn't stop! Amid the giggling i managed to explain the joy i was feeling as tears streamed down my face,and that it was nothing to do with the awfulness of the playing.It was the sheer charm and innocence of it all.....it was JOY that we were expressing.....JOY...understand?

Although this project had an interesting central concept,it quickly caught the public's attention as strictly a comedy turn.

As the personel included most of The Scratch Orchestra,and AMM,as well as Eno and Steve Beresford among others, this certainly had plenty of serious experimental musicians involved.

Somehow, I can't imagine the equivalent happening in the contemporary classical/minimalist scene in the United States.In the UK one cannot be seen,or heard, to be taking oneself too seriously,and always have the obligation to make fun of ourselves.....even the Avant-Garde ones.

The Bonus track, "Classical Muddley" is a parody of those 'Hooked on Classics' records which also tried to introduce 'the Classics', to the great unwashed proletariat by placing a disco beat behind a mix of popular classical works. Us factory fodder types were obviously too thick to appreciate the finer things in life without a bit of dumbing down.

The results of this experiment led to the Portsmouth Sinfonia's records being pitched at the comedy market which earned them a cult following, enough for them to be selling out the Royal Albert Hall by 1974!?

Tracklist:

1.From Peer Gynt Suite No. 1:"Morning" 3:23
2.From Peer Gynt Suite No. 1:"In The Hall Of The Mountain King" 3:00
3.From The Nutcracker Suite:"Dance Of The Sugar Plum Fairy" 2:18

4.From The Nutcracker Suite:"Waltz Of The Flowers" 4:05
5.Fifth Symphony In C Minor, Op. 67 6:18
6.William Tell Overture 2:00
7."Also Sprach Zarathustra" Op. 31 (Excerpt) 2:06
8.Blue Danube Waltz Op. 314 4:36
9."Air" From Suite No. 3 In D Major 4:37
10."Farandole" From L'Arlesienne Suite No. 2 4:05
11."Jupiter" From The Planets, Op. 32 (Excerpt) 4:28

Bonus Track:

12. "Classical Muddley" 3:19

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The 49 Americans ‎– "We Know Nonsense" (Choo Choo Train Records ‎– CHUG 4) 1982

The one legacy the 49 Americans are saddled with is laying the foundations for the mid-eighties mudslide of those horrendous Twee indie groups like Trixies Big Red Motorbike (or was it motorcycle?).In 1982 this was an essential position to take so we could forget that the UK Subs and The Exploited existed And there are plenty twee tunes on this follow up to "E Pluribus Unum". Somehow everyone seems to be able to hold a tune on this collection of happy catchy tunes,which is tantamount to a sell-out. If you like faux-naive,simple and innocent tunes, then this is a classic; but the stink of ambition permeates the Happy pop onslaught. You just know that everyone involved,including arch-avant gardists such as David Toop,Lol Coxhill,and Steve Beresford, are annoyingly intelligent,and don't they want us to know it? Should have been some type of 'Hit'....and probably was.

Tracklist :

A1	Doo-Bee-Doo-Bee
A2	It Is And It Is
A3	Edible
A4	Verbal Culture
A5	Liberty
A6	We Know Nonsense
A7	Tendency To Lie
A8	Glimpse Go By
A9	It's Time
B1	Mon Nuisance
B2	Taste
B3	Imagination
B4	Do
B5	I Be Later
B6	Move Around All Day
B7	Free Trade
B8	Mummy Was A Record Player

DOWNLOAD this nonsense HERE!

The 49 Americans ‎– "E Pluribus Unum" (Choo Choo Train Records ‎– CHUG 1) 1980

DIY, Avant garde underground,post punk sooper groop, the 49 Americans consisted of 1 american and at least 48 collaborators of UK origin(some of whom apparently never met each other!). A 'Pop' version of Gavin Bryars Portsmouth Symphonia,where largely every member plays an instrument he/she isn't too comfortable with,frequently swapping around after each twee tune. At least one member ,David Toop, was in both collectives.

There is a bizarre 'prog' influence ,with a UK DIY version of a Rick Wakeman prog opera on side two, complete with Knights of old,and jesters. DIY's only concept album,and one of thee definitive records of DIY culture.

(apparently this has been reissued with bonus tracks)

Tracklist:

A1	Beat Up Russians
A2	That Man
A3	Involved In Local Chaos
A4	Doubt
A5	Edible
A6	Should Be More Ideal
A7	All The Fun
A8	Sounds Like Ska
A9	Architecture Stops
A10	Don't Sing The Blues
A11	Heritage
A12	Pledge Of Allegiance
	The Musical
B1	Overture
B2	Song Of The Peasants (Chief Peasant)
B3	Tralala (Eldest Prince)
B4	Dragon Eating Peasants Instr.
B5	I Don't Want (Royal Children)
B6	Let Yourself Go (Impulsive Knight)
B7	Digestion Instr.
B8	Fairy Tale (King)
B9	What You Need (Equipped Knight)
B10	Digestion Instr.
B11	Intellectual Yodel (Theoretical Knight)
B12	Pain In The Belly (Friendly Knight)
B13	Digestion Instr.
B14	Ha Ha Ha (Jester)
B15	Aye, There's The Battle (Dreamy Knight)
B16	Digestion Instr.
B17	Yodel Again (Theoretical Knight)
B18	Digestion Instr.
B19	Fairy Tale (Reprise) (King)
B20	Contradictions - The Finale (Jester)

DOWNLOAD to become the fiftieth american HERE!