Various Artists– "Music From Saharan Cellphones Vol. 1" (Sahel Sounds – SS01) 2010

The sound quality of the 'cell phone',as north Americans call them, mobile's for the more sensible quarters of the planet, hits a new low in the recorded medium.If seen on an oscilloscope, lo-bit digital sound capture has the appearance of a block diagram,or brutalist architecture from the Soviet Era so beloved of Vlad "destroyer of worlds wannabe" Putin.He loves the Soviet era almost as much as he does wearing his built up shoes,he being another short arse dictator with a toxic inferiority complex.

This angular sound quality adds a certain je ne sais pas pourquoi,to the pieces involved,and has one imagining a distant horizon sinking below the most distant dune ,and not a person to be seen,except yourself and a 'cell phone' packed with fuzzy desert music from Mali and neighbouring territories who have likely now succumbed to the latest schoolgirl kidnapping antics of Boko Haram.....why is the Earth so full of complete bastards?

As a Stupid White man, I awkwardly find most African music as strangely uplifting as it is incomprehensible to the soul-less paleface.I am often unmoved by such foreign concepts such as 'Soul' music .This, of course makes me feel uncomfortable,being English and raised under the gray skies of misery that imprisons the British Isles.The only way we can assimilate Soul Music is if its backed by Vince Clarke on synthesiser,or a pure expression of misery....in other words Yazoo and Joy Division....that's real white soul music that is.Well..Maybe not Yazoo,you know what i'm getting at(?)as if you are on this blog it is almost certain you are of caucasian origin,but it certainly is NOT the blue eyed soul of such awfulness as Simply Red or Paul Young,and others who simply copy our brethren of colour....I thought I'd end this blurb on a 'Woke' note before i go back to sleep after re-runs of "Love They Neighbour" on me lickle illegal telly-box. The very same Telly-Box on which i just witnessed a crowd of Hungarian school children Jeering the England football team for taking the Knee'!? Makes you just wanna give up dunnit?

This tape is rather flipping good.....having said that,i don't want more than one.....there are another couple of volumes available that should satisfy any guilt laden Honky very nicely indeed.

WARNING!: severe danger of White man dancing in the area!

Tracklist:

A1 - Baye - Tinariwe
A2 - Abdallah - Desert Blues

A3 - Niger - Autotune
A4 - Koudede - Souveniram
A5 - Hamdawa - Algeria
A6 - Hamza Wassila
B1 - Morib - Kabablon
B2 - Auguste Solo - Decale
B3 - Yeli Fuzzo - Abandé
B4 - Tuareg - Old Synth
B5 - Flamzy - Protection
B6 - Aminata W. - Sakou Si Bory
B7 - Papito - Iba One

DOWNLOAD to your cellphone cell block HERE!

Various Artists– "Synths From The Sahara" (Sahel Sounds ) 2014

Try and explain the concept of Kraftwerk to an african and you'd get one of those... 'what the fucking hell are you talking about???'.... kind of looks. You won't get any exotic versions of "Are Friends Electric?" from the Sahara any time soon, just loads of stuff that they always used to play, but...with synthesizers.

Less than interested in the new sonic opportunities  that these electronic toys offered, they just play these things in the same way a classical pianist would play them.....cluelessly,but charming.....except the African would never have considered themselves as the height of civilized sophistication,like those bastards in the classical world would do.

Basically, if the musicians involved, as represented on this C60, had played these same tunes on traditional instruments it would have sounded exactly the same.....so why bother?

What I wanna hear is a weirdo from Mali who dresses and sounds like Gary Numan in 1979...that would be something special to behold.

This is as close as i get to the thoroughly 'do not resuscitate' middle class world of Global, or World, music,as championed by such poncy twerps as Peter Gabriel, Paul Simon,and David Byrne....although David Byrne is in absolutely no way a twerp, just dreadfully misguided on occasion.

However, play this at any white suburban wine and cheese vernissage in support of their local artist 'of Colour',and you'd be heralded as a white hero of outstanding tolerance.

In their minds, anyone who plays any African music simply cannot be Racist,and therefore an eagerly anticipated member of the White Non-Racist but I am multitudes that smear themselves across the western world like so much shit on so much scented (bog roll)toilet paper.

Racist moi?...Naaaaah...well...er....probably.

I do remember being part of an argument about whether Ali G was racist or not, when one of the gobbier participants shouted "look! I've slept with a black man so how can I be Racist!?".....hmmmm?

Who's the most celebrated African Musican?...no, not Fela Kuti, it's obviously Freddie Mercury of Course....that's why there's a track called 'Bismillah' on here inni?.

Tracklist:

A1 Japonais– Bambino Instrui
A2 Mamman Sani– Boodo
A3 Mamman Sani– Ameran
A4 Ahmedou Lewla– Track 15
A5 Unknown Artist– Mauritania
A6 Sidiki Diabate– Amuse
B1 Maloma Et Becave– Untitled
B2 Mamman Sani– Ci Dadi
B3 Ahmedou Lewla– Track 1
B4 Japonais– Nouveau Instrui
B5 Mamman Sani– Bismillah

DOWNLOAD some instant non-racist cred HERE!