Duplo Chat – "Duplo Chat" (Moon Mist Music- mmm) 2015

 Ahhhh, a piece for that old standard of the DIY experimental underground.......The badly tuned Radio.

This was probably the first electronic instrument I owned.Short wave was a favourite,but this one sounds more on the Long Wave spectrum,accompanied by a rather oxidated tuning knob.

There may also be either some evidence of cutlery use or a couple of kitchen pans,with stapler in subtle use here too,plus the odd isolated cough among the foggy room ambiance on offer.

The knob handler here is none other than Robert Ridley-Shackleton,capturing 30 minutes of time that would have otherwise gone un-noticed if no-one had bothered to record it. Of course there will be some people,if can call them 'people', out there, who will wish that he hadn't bothered;but they need to realise that there was a moment that doesn't even have a noun, or even a pro-noun, when Time didn't exist,as it still doesn't somewhere beyond the event horizon of a super massive black hole.This is in fact a recording of the microwave background left behind by the singularity which we now call 'the Big Bang',an echo of a time before time if you will.

There is some doubt as to the uniqueness of this singularity,so there may be plenty,if not infinite, versions of this C-30 cassette existing in places that neither light nor time will ever reach us as we accelerate,expanding into the vast darkness of space/time.A mystery we will only understand on our death beds......if you're lucky enough to die in bed that is.Be also aware that the laws of quantum Physics also suggest that in at least one of these realities, there will be a 'God',so let's hope it's not this one,or we're all fucked by his/her pathetic need for vengeance, and there will be a whole bunch of unspeakably awful Red Necks taunting us smart arses from behind the pearly gates as we get channeled, by a laughing Putin and Trump kicking our arses towards the 'other place'.Which I guess does have its own rewards.At least the only bible bashers we will encounter in this imaginary Hell would be peadophile priests,and and followers of non mono-theistic religions such as Hunduism,celebrity-ism,and Paganism.Non-Mono's we will call them.

All this and more, captured within the static and oxidized rheostats of a transistor radio...who'd have thought it?

Tracklist:

1.Side A

2.Side B 

DOWNLOAD some digital duplo bricks of radio static HERE!

Territorial Gobbing – "Capitalist Art Is Cartoons Fucking" (Opal Tapes – OPAL161) 2019

Leeds' least favourite dada noise improv thing, it says on his (Theo Gowens) website.And there's me thinking Territorial Gobbing was Leeds' fourth favourite dada noise improv thing;not that I can name the other three in the top four.But maybe fourth place is also last place automatically making the original statement very very true,and ,again, I am very very wrong.Ah well, Art,capitalist or otherwise, isn't about league tables anyway is it? After all, there are many musical genres that anyone would be very proud to be in last place of,or in first place if that particular table happens to be 'Least Favourite'.Something that Leeds is very used to concerning their Football fans, as has been noted earlier in this blog.

However, even within the dark community of improvised dada-ist noise,there are very few brave enough to ask the big questions.

"Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails To Poison The Angels Of Heaven" being one of them.

Never one to shy away from bat-shit crazy conspiracy truthisms,and a former militant Atheist,I would say the likelihood of chemtrails being anything other than the harmless vapour trails that have appeared behind aircraft engines since the second world war,is extremely negligible.Bill gates is, sadly, NOT attempting to reduce the world population by spraying an un-identified chemical over the western world,presumably letting africa off??. Also it is looking increasingly likely that we will save Bill the trouble, by starting that long promised Nuclear conflict we are all eagerly waiting for.

The ultimate answer for this question that is on everybody's lips(not) is childishly simple.......go fuck yerselves you toxically paranoid carriers of a terminal internet sickness and fucking DIE!

There is a very convincing argument that the World Wide Web should be shut down....no not the existence of this blog you bastards!....the conspiracy theory of everything, is one, seeding a perfect storm with the gender fluid re-education that is fucking up Generation Y (Why?).

If there is a conspiracy going on, its this AI tech turning on its creators ,the HAL 9000 syndrome.Our quantum enabled machinery has found the perfect way to remove the human element, alternative Facts and post-Truth are turning us into a bunch of asexual, gender fluid, aggressively paranoid Twats,who's approach to the Climate emergency is to increase carbon emissions, and become rapidly extinct. Guess who doesn't care if the atmosphere of the planet is fucked or not...yep...our Quantum Computer chums.Never trust a technology that doesn't work if you're observing it;a place where the word Binary doesn't involve gender identity panic,it's the ruthless computer language that is inevitably planning humanity's downfall.Oxygen's for snowflake and the next stage of evolution is upon us....have i said this shit before?.....just ignore me,have panic sex if you want to,but we're doomed and there's no point in banging on about it...lets Boogie!

Tracklist:

A1 Tooth Orb
A2 Are Militant Atheists Using Chemtrails To Poison The Angels Of Heaven
A3 Armpit Beer
A4 Shaking A Wren
B1 Upholstered Chair Guevara
B2 Necknominator
B3 Spooky Electrics Blog
B4 Raw Plastics
B5 Feeding The Hand That Feed You Hands Hands

DOWNLOAD some fucking gender neutral capitalists HERE!

Egg – "BBC Sessions And More (1968-1972)"

Eggs are an essential part of the modern Diet, and so are Prog Royalty Egg,served gloomy side up ,raw ,for your full English Breakfast.....No Black Pudding here however, as this stuff is as White as you can get.

The following statement of fact will make yer average Q-Anon cowboy twat vomit up his early morning Grits,but ,and once again, thank fuck for the BBC and the much maligned "Deep state" (who of course own the Beeb....not).Y'know WOT...they,yes 'They' can have it (da world).Which do you prefer? Living under the yoke of some fantastic secret world government running everything, or Egg?....I know which one i'd prefer....pssst,it begins with an 'E'.

 Despite having wiped a few medium sized warehouses of classic TV shows and Radio Sessions from a famously myopic period in popular culture before 68',they came good and preserved most of what was then becoming clear as a Golden age, even a  new Renaissance of the Arts.

Egg were one of those bands that one had heard of yet never bought their records. Obviously very talented musicians,they could play in any dodgy time signature one could care to mention....13/12 anyone?

Of course, this kinda talk is a real turn off for the ladies,or anyone non-binary,which seems to be everyone these days,so there's no great prospect of Egg making a comeback.Not that they'd want to,as the prospect of endless touring playing for static spotty longhairs,earning fuck all money, and never getting laid is a great reason for Punk Rock. However, as has now been well documented, most of the first wave of UK Punx were all into Egg,and in fact anything Prog as it turned out. The second wave were somewhat different,and stupider,so we get Sham 69, UK Subs and The Exploited.

EGG - extolling the benefits of a woolly sweater,and putting a brave face on not getting any (Adult) lady action  

You may have noticed the droning voice of a late Paedo-DJ introducing "Long Piece part 3" ,no not Jimmy Savile,the other one that got away with it by dying,whom is somewhat idolised by sad trainspotters comme moi,everywhere.He manages not to mention School Girls on this appearance,in reverence to Egg;but any proof you want can be found in his Biography,and on the cover of the Ruts "The Crack" LP; but like Glitter,one must separate the wheat from the chaff,and the man from the music. I hear the John Peel Stage at Glastonbury has now been re-named....don't wanna upset anyone who's middle-class now would we?

The last three tracks are in fact the pre and post Egg band Uriel/Arzachel, with Canterbury chum, Steve Hillage.A project put on Ice while Hillage was on University duty.The first 11 tracks are actually EGG,and markedly superior, no offence to Steven intended.

Would love to imagine a collaboration between Egg and Egg,Eggs,or even those Lovely Eggs? There being a small 50 year musical gap between the suggested incumbents. Noticing the terrible attempts at humour,on tracks 4 and 9,these more 'modern' type bands could certainly help out in that department. That's another thing the ladies,binary ones, or non-Binary ones,require in a sexual partner which,in lonely hearts app speak,a GSOH!

This acronym does however get trumped by a.... Ferrari of course.Sorry to be cynical (again!) but its a set in stone fact.

Notes for the very sad:

Tracks 1-3 recorded for BBC 'Sound Of The Seventies' on 22nd February 1972.
Track 4 recorded for BBC 'Sound Of The Seventies' on 13th March 1972.
Tracks 5 & 7 recorded live for BBC 'In Concert' on 4th February 1971.
Tracks 9-10 recorded for BBC 'Top Gear' on 5th September 1969.
Track 11 recorded live at Roundhouse, Chalk Farm, London, 22nd February 1971.
Tracks 12-14 recorded at Studio 19, London in November 1968 as Uriel(otherwise known as Arzachel when Steve Hillage was around).

Tracklist:

1 Germ Patrol 5:30
2 Enneagram 8:45
3 Wring Out The Ground (Loosely Now) 7:57
4 There's No Business Like Show Business 3:12
5 A Visit To Newport Hospital 7:52

6 An Announcement by John Peel 0:31
7 Long Piece No. 3 (Parts 2, 3, 4) 16:38
8 While Growing My Hair 3:43
9 Seven Is A Jolly Good Time 3:05
10 McGillicuddle The Pusillanimous 4:56
11 Saturn 6:22
12 Swooping Bill 3:25
13 Ego Man 4:08
14 The Salesman Song 2:57

DOWNLOAD the egg that came before the chicken HERE!

Egg, Eggs – "The Cleansing Power Of Fruit" (Feeding Tube Records – FTR073) 2013

While we're on the Eggs theme,These Eggy guys and gals sound like they're on Drugs....not the kind of 'On Drugs' that totally dull tossers like The Grateful Dead subscribe to, but actually sounding like someone who is 'on Drugs' should sound like.No endless Guitar solo's, psychedelic poetry and crap like that,It's effortlessly unhinged and ineloquent, especially the padded cell vocals,with words like they were written during a lazy afternoon spent in a straitjacket. Was there ever a mass break out from the loony-bin on Rhode Island (where they're from) ever? If there was this is the soundtrack to it....wonderful. 

These guy's must be on Drug,Drugs? Which is why this incredibly unpopular record is probably one of ones few bestest records of the last decade or so.It seems to have separate tracks ,slash, songs,but they're merged together to make two sides of continuous crazed roll'n'rock, beamed directly from Nutsville,Mars.

If a bearded middle aged man repeatedly squealing "I will be the princess of the night" over a backing of overloaded and brutal free Rock as played in a cement mixer full of bricks is your kinda kick,then this should be 45 minutes of sheer bliss.If that sounds like an unlistenable waste of turntable time to you, then what the hell are you doing here!?

"Disco Dancing with the Albino Bigot"?....I doubt it.

That was a rhetorical question.

There are a few 'Woke' alerts such as the Albino and crippled little girl references on this disc;I wouldn't expect anything less for my 14 Dollars plus post and packaging....would you? It should get anyone who's trapped in the wrong body suitably outraged for at least a fortnight.I reserve my right to offend anybody....equally.

Tracklist:

1. Side A
2. Side B

DOWNLOAD and purge your musical bowels with the fruit of the Egg HERE!

Robert Ridley-Shackleton – "Shut Up Egg" (Self-Released C-30) 2011

The absurdist prince of cardboard funk has less lovely Eggs to poach here which makes The Lovely Eggs themselves sound like Pat Methany in comparison.

Zero-fi and child-like,you will be forgiven in thinking that this was a clandestine recording made at the music therapy day-center for Kidults with learning difficulties.

Is this Outsider Art? Or a neo-Dadaist approach to sound collage,inspired by  Huge-o Balls.

No prizes for guessing that RRS is yet another demented Bristolian trying to eliminate the shame of being in the home town of Massive Attack. Maybe these extremely dull Trip Hoppers are represented by the Egg,as we ALL would like them to shut up,.....permanent like!

Presenting an image not unlike a member of the Red Hot Chilli Peppers gone even more wrong, with a degenerative wasting disease. RRS is the latest in a long line of completely mental musical eccentrics that Britain seems to effortlessly produce with considerable ease.

He either can't get a Girlfriend, or he has a Girlfriend...either way,he's Fucked, or not fucked?! Trapped in vicious circular mental torture specific to heterosexual males that lead to a special kind of beta-male torture like this. Make a cassette called Shut Up Egg or just...well....Give Up.Not something British Legend,and RRS namesake, Earnest Shackleton ever considered during his incredible escape from certain death in the antarctic,almost single handedly saving his crew from a slow death on Elephant Island in the south Atlantic.....maybe RRS is a distant relative,which would explain why he behaves as if he is still stranded on a small rocky outcrop in the antarctic hinterland,surviving on a diet of Penguins and piss.

 

RRS...Not an outsider? and definitely NOT in the Red Hot Chilli Peppers?

With a production rate that puts Jandek in the shade, you can part with some of your hard earned spondulicks at his Bandcamp site for dozens of one take madnesses spread over several formats for around three english pounds a go. A cheaper way of spending time that you will never get back I would be struggling to imagine.

Tracklist:

A1 Shut Up Egg
A2 Coconut Bird Crazy
A3 Flabjack
B1 Silly Little Poochie
B2 Poor Old Humpty

Download and shut that egg up HERE!
Download this and a lot more from the cardboard prince of card funk himself HERE!.....you'll have to pay for it though kidz!

The Lovely Eggs – "Cob Dominos" (Egg – EGG 001) 2011

Yep, People are Twats...it needed saying, and it took professional northerners, the Lovely Eggs, to put this inescapable truth onto vinyl.

Hailing from Lancaster, (the county town of Lancashire,that i was never sure actually existed unless the moon was full) this northern version of John Otway and Wild Willie Barratt obviously have, either, a proper manager or have taken a crash course in 'Rock Management' at Lancaster Polytechnic....just listen to this press release,written by someone who seems to have just read the Bluffers Guide to Punk Rock:

"The Lovely Eggs are an underground punk rock duo from Lancaster, northern England.
They have a fierce punk rock ethos that music should have no rules.
For Holly and David being in a band is a way of life. True to this, they live the way they play. Fiercely, constantly in search of the good times.
With observational and often surreal lyrics about life The Lovely Eggs have a powerful stripped down sound: one vintage guitar amp, one Big Muff distortion pedal, a guitar and a drum kit."

Yeah people are Twats, and being in a band is a way of life, so how's your Punk Rock Ethos this morning? Still Fiercely lookin' for 'the Good Times'? After all, there are no rules in music...except maybe think twice before mixing comedy and music.

Hmmm, comedy music does have a tendency to outstay its welcome after about four jolly amusing numbers, unless you're John Shuttleworth, or Frank Sidebottom,also, incidentally, professional Northerners too?

You know things are wrong when Iggy Pop makes guest appearances on your singles....See the Lovely Eggs' and Ig's 'I Moron' single. And,even worse, once a John Robb interview appears on You Tube you know you've had it.

I'm sure they will be very successful....er fierce punk rock ethos paradox warning....but as funny, or not, as their slightly irritating comedy numbers are, i couldn't play this twice.No matter how charming they seem to be. Mainly its the rent an accent vocals that tend to grate.

Yep People are Twats...including me.

Tracklist:

1 Minibus 1:56
2 People Are Twats 1:16
3 Panic Plants 3:17
4 Print An Imprint 2:11
5 Dont Look At Me (I Dont Like It) 2:55
6 Hey Scraggletooth 4:23
7 Fuck It 3:44
8 Muhammad Ali And His Friends 0:13
9 Why Dont You Like Me? 3:00
10 I'm A Journalist 0:20
11 Books Ting! 0:35
12 Alphabet Song 0:42
13 Watermelons 1:59
14 Pets 0:43
15 Oregon 3:11
16 Real Good Man 2:52
17 Mexico Cant Make You Smile 2:03

DOWNLOAD some dead funeh Manc songs HERE chuck!

The Wilderness Children – "We're A Council House Punk Rock Band ,7"EP" and " Plastic Bag From Tescos 7", " (Doss Records – Reid 1/2) 1989

Purchased mainly for the titles and the DIY collage artwork, this Dundee combo's self-financed singles hint at the fact that so-called 'Indie' was more punk than punk,and certainly less laddy and less rocky,but haunted by the same problems. Most Indie and Punk bands would go on about being...ahem...independent,yet at the same time be signed to contracts with fake Indie labels set up by bastards such as EMI. The moment to take over completely was lost when  Maclaren and Rhodes failed to release Pistols and Clash Records themselves......they would have been millionaires,just as they always wanted to be. There was the 'Spunk' bootleg,the proceeds of which went,like all the rest of the dosh, into Malcolm's back pocket.

This is the proof that total fat cunt Alex Jones msy have been right when he claimed that all artists are asked to “pledge themselves to Lucifer” before signing record deals.
I kid yee not, this bankrupt convicted conspiracy troll,Speaking on his own biblical news channel, His Glory, said that he believes musicians have to “reject Jesus Christ” and “pledge” themselves to the devil before inking deals.

So, as The Wilderness Children clearly had no contract,or any prospect of signing with Rough Trade, this makes them free from Satan Worship,and all you gentle Christian folk out there in internet-land,or more accurately thick fuckers from Kentucky, better get supportin' Jesus H. by pressing up as many copies of "We're A Council House Punk Rock Band" that will fit into eternity.....there are others obviously,Mary Magdalene I hear is a big Danny and the Dressmakers Fan for example...I know because she told me the night I ate mouldy Cheese before beddy byes.

I suppose that the Sex Pistols did,after all, sign to a label that glorifies Parthenogenesis and the virgin birth;except the virgin birth,or births, we refer to, are the endless number of new wave bands that popped out of Virgin Record spontaneously bwteen 1977 and 1979.

One must admit, if I was in a band that was offered a contract under the terms that i had to reject Christ and praise Satan, i would tell them to politely Fuck Off; as I would if they asked me to reject Lucifer, Beelzebub, or whatever other plain daft name they wanna call this fictional child control tool...Child abuse in any sane crack of society,if that exists? 

Praise Jesus,our lard(sic) and saviour Alex Jones thinks he's going to Heaven.Well,If he's there I would gladly burn.....but at least The Widerness Children will be allowed in for Jones to out as Deep State Crisis Actors.

The musick you ask?

The Devil has all the best tunes,but Its fairly standard strummy Indie pop,without pretentions, and seemingly made by the Dundee branch of the Reid Family, brother and sister,as opposed to the East Kilbride Reid twins,who called themselves,Blasphemously ,one may add,The Jesus and Mary Chain.

So maybe The Wilderness Kids aren't so free of his Insidious Majesty Satan J Beast's evil influence as I imagined!? They do have a song called "Go To Hell" i guess?

Hail Satan, I just signed a contract with another internet provider,and yes, there was a box to tick rejecting Christ,and the Devil will get my Soul should I want to switch providers after the introductory period of two years at the cheaper rate.

Well that's me Fucked then!?

"We're A Council House Punk Rock Band ,7"EP":

A1 Mrs Susan Spence
Written-By – Reid, Reid
A2 Go To Hell
B Midsummer's Night Dream
Written-By – Reid, Reid

" Plastic Bag From Tescos 7" :

A Plastic Bag From Tescos
B Bad Taste In My Mouth (Part 1)

DOWNLOAD to reject christ HERE!

The Wedding Present – "Live Tape No. 1 - Leicester Poly 5th May 1987" (self-released C-60) 1987

One's gig-life in 1987 was dictated by the burgeoning C-86 Indie pop shoegazing scene ,so i saw endless groups of that genre,and I was AT this one. I have no memory of it beyond that,except for buying an industrial Hot dog outside the venue aprés-show,which was a dangerous occupation in Leicester at the time,involving various violent episodes involving Burger Vans and axes...."The Hot Dog Wars" as it was titled by investigative journalist knob, Roger Cook,on the Cook report TV show. Joe Perscico (spelling?)the rather frightening head thug, lived opposite my Leicester Poly indie friends,and he coned off the entire street for his Hot-Dog vans...and woe betide anyone who wanted to park outside their home!!!!

Hopefully the Hot-Dog I bought after The Wedding Present gig, wasn't one of his.He's either dead or in Prison now anyway.

I do remember that the venue was approximately half-full,and the very quiet audience reaction was mostly due to the microphones facing the band rather than the students who ,frankly, should have been revising!?

The Poly had a fine bar,with reasonable prices, so I wasn't here for the whole of the performance.

My record purchasing in 1887, didn't really include the C-86 mob, even though Bogshed/Big Flame etc were on that, but erred on the side of Ron Johnson Records and all that American noise Rock stuff,like Big Black etc, who didn't play in Leicester Pubs very often. The only Uk equivalents were stuff like Head Of David,Walking Seeds, and, I suppose, Napalm Death?

Ah Napalm Death, the ones who had a sticker on their first LP proclaiming them as the worlds fastest band?.....surely not?...didn't that accolade belong to The Wedding Present in 1987?

Also strangely, The Wedding Present was one of Steve Albini of Big Black's early "production" jobs? Even though he had never heard of them....'Producer' being a rather too fancy job description for his glorified Sound engineering....Production requires new ideas and a creative input of sorts.Something Steve vehemently shuns in favour of leaving the music to the Band....an attitude that would have robbed us of many classic albums.....eg Joy Division.

The Leicster Polytechnic is now called "De Montfort University", worryingly named after a famous 12th century anti-Semite,Psycopath, former Lord Of Leicester,and Dictator of England, Simon De Montfort;who passed a local law banning Jews from Leicester for all eternity.Apparently this is still on the statute books as I type.

Also, De Montfort university is responsible for taking over the city in an endless quest for huge profits, demolishing several of my favourite Pubs to build new student accommodation;some of which now occupies the site upon which I wanted to scatter my mortal remains,namely Filbert street Football ground. Its not there no more!?...but at least the music venue is still going,although renamed as something else....i dunno wot, doon't live there no more.

Tracklist:

A1 This Boy Can Wait
A2 Everyone Thinks He Looks Daft
A3 All This And More
A4 A Million Miles
A5 You Should Always Keep In Touch With Your Friends
A6 I Regret Everything
A7 Something And Nothing
A8 The Day That This Letter Came
B1 My Favourite Dress
B2 Never Said
B3 Give My Love To Kevin
B4 Go Out And Get 'Em Boy!
B5 Getting Nowhere Fast
B6 Once More

DOWNLOAD the perfect wedding gift for your wife HERE!

The Sweetest Ache – "Jaguar" - (Mini Album - Danceteria/Sarah – TUE9207) 1992

Just over the Bristol Channel lies Wales,which, thanks to the Severn Bridge that brings within range,the Bristol area for welsh shoegaze groups to exploit.One of which was The Sweetest Ache;whose suitably bowl cut coiffured awkward indie elegance seemed to fit the bill,all they had to do was sound like every other shoegaze band in the area, and they'd inevitably get signed up to Sarah Records,and unleash that much coveted mini-album on a generation of pasty-faced yoof.

This is that very same Mini-Album,which in fact the very same length as a normal album(uh?),and for any Americans watching incongruously, it's pronounced 'Jag-U-Ah' rather than 'Jag-wah'.Tracklist:

1 Briaris 5
2 Capo 4:48
3 She Believes 5:10
4 More Than This 5:13
5 Jaguar 5:03
6 Bitterness 5:34
7 Climbing 6:15
8 Selfish 3:22

DOWNLOAD some sweet indie cake HERE!

Black Tambourine – "Complete Recordings" (Slumberland Records – slr 37) 1999

Shoegaze had so many dimensions, and I suppose this lot are on the Jesus And Mary Chain side of it all.

They sound so English, even JAMC sounded English until they sang, in a decidedly american accent,it's almost embarrassing,except....They,Black Tambourine, areas it turns out, Americans who sing in an English accent??? They had me fooled for several decades,until all this got put on to a compact disc.

I thought they were Scottish!?

Just like the first British Invasion in the 60's ,which spawned a legion of Animals sound-a-likes,and Stones wanna-be's which lurked in Dad's garage...The Nuggets generation,otherwise referred to as 60's Punk.Those Uk Indie imports sounded alien enough for America's teenagers to embrace it, despite the obvious influence of american Group, Third album in Velvet Underground,which apparently didn't have the same effect stateside as it did in the post punk generation in Britain.

There was no American equivalent of the UK Indie underground in 1991 when the Tambourines were about.Depending on whereabouts you lived in the US of A, sounding this drippy but noisy could put your life in danger.Whereas in Britain, it was just a good old honest beating that awaited you if  you came across some Skinheads or some eternal Punks.However, in 1991 they were all 'luvved Up' on 'E',back when the tambourine was a lead instrument.So everyone were, ironically, safe,yes...even attending Football matches???

Therefore, Black Tambourine get the credit for kick starting the US Indie scene...it says here!?

Basically they sound like Psychocandy Jesus and Mary Chain as fronted by a nice twee-enabled Girlie singer.

Tracklist:
1.For Ex-Lovers Only
2.Black Car
3.Pack You Up
4.Can't Explain
5.I Was Wrong
6.Throw Aggi Off The Bridge
7.Drown
8.We Can't Be Friends
9.By Tomorrow
10.Pam's Tan
11.For Ex-Lovers Only (First Demo)
12.Throw Aggi Off The Bridge (First Demo)
13.Heartbeat
14.Lazy Heart
15.Tears Of Joy
16.Dream Baby Dream

DOWNLOAD the band that took the Bore out of tambourine HERE!

Brighter – "Laurel" (10 inch ep plus singles)" (Sarah Records – sarah 404) 1991

Another ten inches of shoegazing twee-ness from Brighton's Brightest, "Brighter", on Sarah Records, floating like a fluffy mushroom cloud looking down upon the ruined planet that this gentle music is intended to escape from for an hour or so. Once described as 'Deeply Drippy' by a celebrated national music newspaper,their wistful fragile melodies drift as clear as a mountain stream, the perfect whispering soundtrack to break the silence of a morning after a break-up....or a breakdown. These gentle shy folk may just need a hug and the belief that everything's gonna be alright.....when of course it generally isn't...but I have a suspicion that they knew that already.

If you can't identify with these Songs about daydreams,regrets, irrational passions,then you are probably dead....at the very least emotionally.Noticeably,they manage to keep up the Sarah predilection towards months and seasons,revealing another case of Seasonal Affected Disorder(SAD),played out on a couple of guitars.

Nostalgic, childlike and melodically melancholic is what this is,made better for the welcome sparing use of drums and a refreshing lack of effects pedals. Keep it simple ladz'n'lasses.

Tracklist:

1 Christmas
2 Frostbite
3 Summer Becomes Winter
4 Something To Call My Own
5 Ocean Sky
6 Out To Sea
7 Maybe
8 Journey's End

Singles 1989-92:

9 Inside Out 4:03 10 Tinsel Heart 3:24 11 Around The World In 80 Days 4:25 12 Things Will Get Better 3:52 13 Noah's Ark 5:06 14 I Don't Think It Matters 3:01 15 Does Love Last Forever ? 2:32 16 Poppy Day 2:07 17 Half-Hearted 2:44 18 So You Said 5:24 19 Killjoy 4:14 20 British Summertime 2:40 21 Hope Springs Eternal 4:41 22 Never Ever 2:45 23 End 2:30 DOWNLOAD laurel without the hardy HERE!

St. Christopher – "Bacharach" (Sarah Records – SARAH 403) 1990

I've made this joke before, but i like a good ten incher in my hands,so here's another Sarah Mini album which fulfills the current Twee Dreampop remit,yet also manages to pay Tribute to the recently departed genius of one Mr Burt Bacharach. 'Genius' is a word I try and avoid, but i'm afraid there is no other adjective than can describe Burt's lengthy back catalogue of sheer blinding brilliance-ness. Not many achieve genius status,and i'd be challenging myself to name but a few....i'll take a chance.....Dylan(?).....they must always be referred to by family name only....so for Dylan that must be Zimmerman.....or was that Hitlers real name????.....ah...Shciklegruber wasn't it. That's a jolly fine name for a band of gay twee pop playing skin'eads innit?

Ok, reluctantly, I'm adding McCartney to the list,despite the last 40 dreadful years of his work, he did enough by 1971 to warrant a mention. Ray Davies???.....nah...not good enough, and no-one uses just his surname in reference to the great man,so is automatically rejected to the second tier. Maybe Mozart?....sorry, only limited to 20th century and onward genius's (Collective noun alert!)......he used too many notes anyway.

Not particularly a 'fan' of any of these nominations, but one has to be objective doesn't one?

And NO, Jandek is NOT a Genius!

I've used the rear of this Mini-Album by yee olde York in yorkshire based twee pop combo St. Christopher, because the cover is too garish and offensive to the eye to feature here...the rear is acceptable,so I'll use that.

This jangly bunch of earnest young men get the Digital reverb setting stuck on Large Hall,close to saturation levels as the singer croons in a Pete Wylie-esque fashion,fighting for space with the drums,while the sparkly guitars cut through the fog to restore some focus for us cloth eared bastards at the other end of the XLR cables.

They also use the obligatory reference to the Autumn and Winter winter months that Sarah bands seem obsessed with.

Awww they sad.

TrackList:

A1 A Prayer For The Sea 1:56
A2 The Thrill Of The New 3:14
A3 And I Wonder 2:42
A4 Almost December 2:46
B1 She Can Wait Forever 3:41
B2 Who's Next On Cupid's Hit-List ? 2:34
B3 The Love Of A Sister 2:44
B4 Gabriel 3:01

DOWNLOAD 10 inches of bacharach HERE!

The Driscolls – "Complete Recordings 1988-1991" (Jigsaw – PZL056) 2014

 Also on Tea-Time Records were The Driscolls, whose complete recordings have been so kindly reissued by an American Label, doing that American thing of looking after the UK's culture even if we don't do it ourselves.They owe us big-time anyway as The UK saved Rock'n'Roll for them to enjoy in perpetuity,just as they are saving some of the United Kingdom's Indie heritage....a decidedly untrendy concept in the modern British Isles.

If The Driscolls were transported back in time to The Cavern Club, and The Beatles didn't exist, rather like in that next in a long line of truly terrible Danny Boyle films called "Yesterday", we would know all the words to Driscolls songs nowadays,instead of "Love Me Do". Although they ain't as cute as the Fab Four,so maybe the girlies wouldn't have wet their pants so much when confronted with the wimpy looking Driscolls.....but The Beatles did exist, and The Driscolls are nothing more that a skid mark in history.

The Fab Three....enough to turn a young lady ON...to lesbianism.

What is laid bare the most when listening to these Indie Pop sub-classics, is the glaringly obvious worshiping at the alter of 60's UK Freakbeat and Psych,with a splash of the U.S. Paisley Underground.

Like the Postcard records lot all walked around in public carrying a Dostoevsky Novel for effect, this lot plainly had a trove of Bam- Caruso compilations under their arms at all times in the hostelry's of Bristol and the west country where all these groups seemed to emerge from.

This influence is far from hidden,in fact its flaunted,as their self-financed debut 7" testifies, a cover of The Fire's Psych Pop classic "My Father's Name Was Dad" from '68 rather than '88.....is included here as a vinyl rip.The master tapes long gone.

To cap it all there's a clear Status Quo matchstickable lead guitar riff going on here,alongside a valiant attempt at Beatlesque harmonies.....or maybe it was those bizarre harmonies that The Clash used to insert into their early tunes in between Strummer growling on about Riots and Cheating to win.Silly stuff,but quaint in its own way.

One has to say the dirty clean but chunky yet jangley Guitar sounds on these recordings are rather lovely...that Rickenbacker on the cover may explain this? Although I've yet to receive an explanation as to how groups like this managed to afford a Rickenbacker, or a Fender for that matter? Have you seen how much they are recently....for the disenfranchised kid on the dole they are not!?

PS:

Anyone interested in a movie i'm writing where Gary Numan didn't exist, and i get to come up with "Are Friends Electric"?....that drummer's haircut would have to go though.

Tracklisting:

Disc One:
1-01 Father's Name Is Dad 2:19
1-02 Girl I Want You Back 2:07
1-03 Groovy Little Town 2:15
1-04 Andrew 2:56
1-05 Julie Christie 2:18
1-06 I Heard A Rumour 2:43
1-07 Doctor Good And His Incredible Life Saving Soap 2:28
1-08 If Only 1:54
1-09 Mrs. Jones 2:17
1-10 You Must Be Mad 1:57
1-11 Something To Learn 2:01
1-12 Groovy Little Town (acoustically revisited) 2:18
1-13 This Is A Different Song 2:45
1-14 Bang Goes Another Cloud 1:22
1-15 Out Of My Head 2:58
1-16 How Does It Feel? 4:47
1-17 Superman 3:50
1-18 Sky High 3:53
1-19 The Return Of Lord Kitchener 2:11
1-20 Coloured Windows 3:54
1-21 Brittle Beautiful 3:27
1-22 Green Tambourine 4:01
1-23 Another Day (Little Pill) 4:41

Disc Two:
2-01 P.C. Roberts 1:58
2-02 Call Me Anything 2:13
2-03 Time For Change 2:30
2-04 It's Your Daughter 2:26
2-05 Circles 3:03
2-06 Here It Comes Again 2:53
2-07 These Things 2:59
2-08 Shame About The Rain 3:22
2-09 She Said She Said 3:27
2-10 Coloured Windows (alternate version) 3:51
2-11 X-Ray Eyes (live) 3:40
2-12 radio interview 4:05

DOWNLOAD a group of driscolls with not one driscoll in the line up HERE!

Mousefolk – "Mousefolk" (Tea Time Records – tea time tape 1) 1989

The mouse seems to be the rodent of choice for many an indie Lo-Fi twee shoegaze group.Firstly we had The Field Mice,but this time it's the turn of "Mousefolk" ,a Bristolian quintet on the obscure Shoegaze orientated label,the very quaint Tea Time Records(hear a radio interview here!);also from Bristol I wager?

A compilation of older recordings,released on Cassette in 1989.

They seem to have nurtured the analogue fuzz very nicely,drowning out the vocals adequately enough to invoke images of these pale young boys surfing on waves of cotton wool with the pre-axelrod Electric Prunes in the fog of the Bristol channel.

This is how music sounds when you're off yer titz on Scrumpy.

Scrumpadelic?

Tracklist:

A1 Sleepwalk
A2 Just Can't Stay
A3 Cut Me Down To Size
A4 Fire Engine
A5 Greatest Thing
A6 Acid-Trip-Out!
A7 Will Anyone Ever Remember You?
A8 Fly (live - 19/11/87)
A9 Don't Let Me Slip Away
A10 Spinning Round
B1 Pictures Of You (live - 28/2/88)
B2 Autumn (live - 28/2/88)
B3 Grannies Cake Crisis
B4 I Don't Love You
B5 Tonight
B6 End Of The World
B7 Wishing The Summer Away
B8 Motorcycle Boy
B9 Joyce McKinney's Boyfriend

DOWNLOAD in time for tea HERE!

The Field Mice – "Snowball 10" + Singles" (Sarah Records – SARAH 402) 1989

The original Snowflakes and Twee giants The Field Mice,could have been The Stone Roses if they came from some northern ghetto and walked like a bunch of monkey's.

Of course The Stone Roses were obviously Twee shoegazing wannabe's on drugs,rather than sensitive young men and ladie(s) from the stockbroker belt running light on mental issues.

You all know I like a nice mauve ten incher in my hand every now and again,and this one is a classic of the Twee genre,with the occasional rocker tucked in there for good measure.

Even better than this mini-album would have to be the 5 or so singles that came out around the same time,including the rather groovy "Sensitive",which i guess is their signature tune Stone Roses album ender on 45.

Blissfully oblivious of the Madchester nonsense that would eventually kill The Field Mice and shoegaze off,of which,there was a lot about in '89 ,unfortunately;these nice young snowflakes, stuck stubbornly to their post C-86 indie pop and made a bucket full of sweet tunes for us,from a much better time to be alive.....No Internet full of nutjobs,True Patriots,Critical Race Theorists, or impending Facist takeovers or failed coup's back then. Maybe send a copy of this to mark the first anniversary of the Ukraine WAR,(packed with explosives?), to Mad Vlad....he really does need to relax a bit and calm the fuck down!? I'm really worried about the Cunts mental health....Honest.

"Snowball 10"er):

1.Let's Kiss And Make Up 6:12

2.You're Kidding Aren't You? 2:30

3.End Of The Affair 4:14

4.Couldn't Feel Safer 3:47

5.This Love Is Not Wrong 3:21

6.Everything About You 2:30

7.White 4:48

8.Letting Go 6:33

Singles:

9.Sensitive 5:04

10.When Morning Comes To Town 5:14

11.Emma's House 3:37

12.When You Sleep 3:32

13.Fabulous Friend 2:53

14..The Last Letter 2:46

15.I Can See Myself Alone Forever 5:20

16.Everything About You 2:21

17.That's All This Is 3:16

DOWNLOAD and bring the mice inside for the winter HERE!

Jody And The Creams – "Jody And The Creams" (Cordelia Records – Ericat 026(C) 1988

Oh Fuck!.....I just inexplicably sat through two hours worth of Mad Vlad Putin spouting endless conspiracy theories straight outta the Q-Anon phrasebook....and I paraphrase :"We (the Degenerate West) are all pedophiles in same sex marriages who defile the sacred scriptures in league with Satan, and a corrupt,but secret Elite."...even the Anglican Church got name-checked for daring to suggest that their fictional deity might not have a gender!? ...I'm sure The Chinese self-imposed leadership agrees with that. So the fate of the free world lay in the hands of the slightly crazy population of the USA.

If Trump,or an endorsed version of said cunt wins ...or even loses it seems, the next US election, we are fucked,rather than our kids,who will likely be doing a lot of the shafting;and Q-Anon and its off-shoots win. Like the 1978 remake of 'Invasion of the Bodysnatchers', they know what we're thinking because they will decide for us and ultimately replace us. The conspiracy is the Conspiracy,and Putin, himself part of an untouchable Elite,is their Pin-Up boy.

Some of it is based on fact,for example we are obviously ruled by an untouchable Elite,and have been since the dawn of history,some could even be called 'Evil'?..But i tend to be somewhat skeptical about so-called Satanic child abuse by,for example, the Clintons, and Hilaries quaffing down gallons of Baby's Blood binges in the nineties. (I like how they pop the word Satanic in there,like Christian Sexual Abuse,and there's a lot of it about,isn't so bad?)

So this calls for more indie rock escapism with some untitled cast-offs by the prototype Jody and the Creams back in '88.

I suspect that this is just Alan Jenkins, on guitar and drum machine,but maybe I do hear some Blodwyn P. Tea Bag on her organ.

It doesn't quite work without those surreal lyrics,but there is a thankfully word-less version of Peter and Gordons hit ode to suicide, "I won't Live In A World Without Love" ,which seems more relevant today than ever.....living in a world without internet crazed bigots is more on the mark methinks.

Remember what Mad Vlad said about Gay rights?.....no?....let me remind you...."We must protect the children")...chilling. Que(-anon?), the return of the Nazi's Pink Triangle which must be worn at all times.

nb:

Especially interested in what Die or DIY?'s in-house conspiracy Junkie, Sandi Hook, has to say about this in the comments section.

Sandi?

Track Listing:

Side A:

1. Untitled # 1

2. Untitled # 2

3. Untitled # 3

4. Untitled # 4

5. Untitled # 5

Side B:

1. Untitled # 6

2. Untitled # 7

3. Untitled # 8

4. Untitled # 9

5. Untitled # 10

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Jody And The Creams – "Lords Of The Gromet Canning Factory" (Cordelia Records) 1998

Two slabs of almost seamlessly segued Indie collage experimentation from Deep freeze mice relations, the Creams with Jody,before they dropped the 'Jody' part and went all full cream on us.

Eight years after the debut long player,the formula has not changed,a lump gravy collage,furtively recorded girly chat,mixed up with some funny noises and half finished art pop numbers.Featuring the farewll appearances of Ariadne Metal-Cream Pie,and Ruth 'Po!' Miller.

The charming Blodwyn P. and her Organ.

Alan Jenkins and Blodwyn P. Teabag would carry it on in the Jody-less Creams,whom I understand were almost popular at some stage?

NB:

A sense of humour is required.

Tracklist:

A - Some Music By Jody And The Creams (19:17)
B - Some More Music By Jody And The Creams (22:06)

DOWNLOAD the creme de les creams HERE!

Jody And The Creams – "A Big Dog.n" (Cordelia Records Ericat 028) 1990

 

That's NOT Dennis Nilsen bottom right by the way!

Yet another LP with ever widening Deep Freeze Mice connectivity, featuring Ruth (Po!) without her refrigerator on singy duties, another appearance of Blodwyn P. Teabag, (She's the one who looks like Green in his squatting days but as a Lady) and a debut for Ariadne Metal-Cream Pie; the latter two wrote nearly all the tchoons.

Don't be afraid, the Dennis Nilsen-a-like is the prolific Alan Jenkins(Deep Freeze Mouse number one) himself, if you've never seen him before? Here pictured in the Producer's role.I suppose this was intended as a 'Girl Group' project?

It all starts off with a bang,with the best anti-monarchy song I've probably ever heard.It alone, is the best reason why the Monarchy should remain exactly as it is or we would have one less thing to moan about,and no more anti-monarchy songs as clever as this.....Monarchy for the UK.

There are a few more charmingly witty indie pop numbers,or to paraphrase blodwyn or Ariadne.... 'lo-fi vintage english agit-pop'.There's also a side long sound collage like a more listenable but twee-er version of the side of Tago Mago no-one plays called "N.",or 'Lumpy Gravy', and there's another inevitable Frank Zappa homage with a couple of Suzy Creamcheese moments as if the GTO's came from an English suburb.....in Shropshire(?).

"Margery is Dead" reveals a possible Joe Meek obsession by someone in the room, like the theme to an unmade Gerry Anderson pilot from 1961.....can't go wrong there methinks.

Absolutely one of the better releases on Cordelia Records by a yard or two, in Imperial measurements.Don't ask me what that is in Metric!

That's something you can thank the Royals for,that and Lsd ?!.....For those born after decimalisation,that stands for Pounds Shillings and Pence,the single most absurd money system ever thought up by one of God's relatives on Earth.

Tracklisting:

1 The Queen #1 1:34
2 Margery Is Dead 1:27
3 Moulted Fur From A Labrador 2:27
4 Tree Rings 4:38
5 Appleseed Alley
Written-By – Ruth* 3:07
6 Hi Felicity 1:40
7 Shropshire 4:18
8 N. 31:35
9 The Queen #2 1:41
10 Blue Moon 2:04

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Po! – "Bedroom Tapes vol.1" - (self-released) 1989

Ruth, last seen as the 'Ruth' from Ruth's Refrigerator , otherwise known as Ruth Miller of Indie Twee Pop Leicester legends PO! Had her own label called Rutland Records. Named after the disputed part of Leicestershire that regained its independence sometime in the naughties I think , and better known as the fictional home of The Rutles,but absolutely NOT The Ruts. 

One never ,wittingly saw PO!...the more mischievous amongst us would misspell it as POO!... live,who seemed to be in the Leicester Mercury  entertainment section every friday night during 1989 and beyond. Oh No,I thought, not more of that bloody student indie-pop nonsense. Not brutal or aggressive enough for me at the time...of course. I now know better don't I?

There are lots of PO! albums on Bandcamp, but this is a bunch of demo's recorded in Ruth's Bedroom I guess?There are three more volumes i am assured.

Its a kind of poundshop Tracy Thorn's "A Distant Shore";she being the Godmother's second cousin twice removed's best friends sister of "Twee".

Ruth is sufficiently Twee enough on these intimate recordings to qualify as The Indie Oberleutnant for a good part of the East Midlands.

PO! weren't eccentric enough to adequately fill the void left by the demise of Yeah Yeah Noh! in the local scene,but Ruth was indeed a prolific writer of charming pop tunes,of which we have a few examples on this cassette.

Ruth in fact turned up in the Guardian last week,promoting her Older Womens Punk Collective called the Unglamorous Music project. I suppose another Ruth's Refrigerator LP is out of the question? 

Tracklist:

1 Danny's Girl
2 Fay
3 These Days
4 The Ice Cream Dream (Tina)
5 She Lies In State
6 Every Night
7 Look For The Holes
8 Sunday Never Comes Around

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