Thin Yoghurts ‎– "Girl On The Bus" (Lowther Street Runner ‎– YOG 1) 1980

Oh the sublime ordinariness of the poetry contained within these grooves! Naive charm materialised in a seven inch plastic disc, with a superb "first thought,best thought" designed in one minute stream of consciousness picture sleeve, printed on the cheapest paper imaginable.
If you don't love this pop masterpiece from a parallel universe, then you belong in the universe we are in; a joyless place where Leona Lewis and that Hairy Angel bird from Britain’s got talent rule the airwaves,in place of the Scrotum Poles and Danny & the Dressmakers!??

Tracklist:

A	Girl On The Bus
B	Drink Problem

DOWNLOAD the girl from the bus HERE!

Funboy Five ‎– "Life After Death" (Cool-Cat-Daddy-O Recs. ‎– Phun 1) 1980

Stu mentioned(see comments for the Scrotum Poles) that this was his favourite single.So for those of you who are curious as to his motivation behind this statement,here's your chance to find out why he thinks this is better than a record that contains the genius of 'Helicopter Honeymoon'? Is this possible,yes, but its a close run thing.
Is there life after death?
The philosophers that were the Funboy Five prove that there is definitely death after life at least for human kind; but for crap pop groups there is immortality after death, and in some cases, a rebirth.
Its the kind of amateurish,charmingly naïve,colloquial outsider punk 'indie' prototype, that we all now love and cherish like a relic of a dear departed relative; and now call UK DIY.
Release your record and then Fuck Off! This is the way it should be; if only U2 and Coldply did this? In fact forget about the 'release your record' bit in their case;just FUCK OFF......PLEASE!
(Check out the "Anything Could Happen in the next Half Hour" compilation tape earlier in this blog,for, amonst other delights, more Funboy Five.)

Tracklist:

A	Life After Death
B	Compulsive Eater

DOWNLOAD and believe in death after life HERE!

The Door And The Window - "Subculture EP" (NB Records NB1) 1979

Such a legendary racket from a legendary band! The debut ep by seminal DIY band The Door and the Window. This is how to do anti-rock, its almost as if rock music was never invented, and a lesson in thinking outside the box of accepted thought. 'You can't do that', they said; 'oh Yes you fucking can' said the Door and the Window. Don't be a subculture fashion slave by doing the standard thing. Get their Production Line  ep here, Detailed Twang LP here, and Permanent Transcience tape here.

Track Listing:

Side Door
A1 Subculture Fashion Slaves
A2 Nostradamus
Side Window
B1 Don't Kill Colin
B2 Wurst Band

DOWNLOAD to avoid being a subculture fashion slave HERE!

The Instant Automatons - "Peter Paints His Fence" ep (Deleted Records DEP001) 1980

 In view of the recent passing of the DIY giant that was Protag(Instant Automatons,Zounds etc), here is a belated tribute to this much missed legend, in the form of the classic "Peter Paints His Fence" EP.
The lyrics to track four read like a biography of my life,and I’m sure other readers of this blog will identify with its harsh truths also.

People Laugh At Me (Coz I Like Weird Music)

I was in a pub the other night
When a bunch of mods came in
They eyed me up then they came over
And said, "Hey, what’s your scene?
Are you a hippy, a mod or a punk?
Got a scooter or a motorbike?"
I can’t understand why they burst out laughing
When I told them the music I like
People laugh at me coz I like weird music
People just don’t understand
Why pay £6 for an album when you can
Listen to a weird noise band?
I had a girlfriend called Josephine,
She liked Abba and The Bee Gees
She thought music was about lawyers and accountants
Percentages and legal fees
Just the other night we stayed up late
Playing records till half past ten
Then I played a Danny & The Dressmakers tape
And I never saw Josephine again
People laugh at me coz I like weird music
People just don’t understand
Why pay £6 for an album when you can
Listen to a weird noise band?
(For free!)
Listen to a weird noise band (repeat ad nauseum)

It sort of sums up my life i reckon; well that and Part-Time Punks by the Television Personalities.

DOWNLOAD peter's painted fence HERE!

The Scrotum Poles – "Revelation EP" (One Tone ‎– ERECT 1) 1980

The near mythical ep from Dundee's Scrotum Poles.
Thrill to the romance of "Helicopter Honeymoon" and wonder at the abstract lyricism of "Pick The Cats Eyes Out". This is one of the classic self -financed releases of the period.
They 'like the Television Personalities' ,it says on the sleeve; and that best describes the tunes pressed onto this porky prime cut. Kind of a sillier version of the TVP's,but did it better by not releasing more than one EP.
They're almost too famous these days to be included on Die or DIY?

 Tracklist:

	Sad
A1	Why Don't You Come Out Tonight?
A2	Night Train
	Happy
B1	Pick The Cat's Eyes Out
B2	Helicopter Honeymoon
B2	Radio Tay

DOWNLOAD from the scrotum HERE!

A Mystery Post by a Mystery Band????.....to avoid DCMA shit! (1979-80)

During the good old days of Die or DIY? version 1;one had great difficulties posed by a certain Mystery DIY Band, who obviously had a member who had gone on to join the other side. Every time I put their EP's and Demo's online, they were taken down, no matter where I hid them. They are either very embarrassed by these recordings or,have some awful ambition to one day make some money out of them,which regrettably makes them 'Fake'!
This doesn't detract from the greatness of their music,which you can now access here as 'The Mystery Band', which will hopefully avoid these twats from getting it taken down again!

But for a bit of fun here's a clue to their name:
1/ Fill in the missing word from this Pop Group classic: "She is ________ Good and Evil"
2/ Complete this some bizarre Matt Johnson vehicle: _____ The.
3/ What is the opposite reaction to Explode?

Put the three answers together and you get the name of 'The Mystery Group'......isn't this fun?

The Mystery bands first EP:

More classic 'Outsider Punk' or messthetics,whatever you want to call it. A classic DIY EP, crammed full with weak vocals, cheap guitars, muffled drums, and buckets of charming naïveté. Sounds like it was recorded in a council house living room, full of synthetic curtains, flowery wallpaper, and shagpile carpets.There's even a few infectious, but spidery, melody lines to jolly the uncommited along.This is POP, yeah yeah!

 Then we have The Mystery Band's second EP, and they've got more competent, and have listened to the Fall. A fine example of do it yourself post punk that sank without trace under the torrent of such product in the so-called Post Punk era. Released in a limited edition of 250,how could they compete with Factory, Rough Trade and Virgin,who had the market sewn up. But that's why we love the also-rans like this classic Fall-wanna be nugget of DIY majesty.

Then finally, we have a C-60 of Mystery Band demo's and rehearsals.
Information is very thin on this one, but it sounds like a bootleged collection of rehearsals and demo's recorded on one of those press play and record cassette recorders with the built in mike.
The sound quality is classic shit-fi DIY cassette recording, including the odd bit of microphone rumble , but thats how we like it.
This is like discovering a fossilised fish from the pre cambrian waters of planet DIY. One forgets that these groups often had more than the handfull of songs that ever made it to vinyl, and here is the evidence.
Not that the group want us to hear them!? So take this chance now while this is still available.Someone from this group is very good at getting things taken down.......even from hosts based in Russia!

A Comment  from Anonymous from the comments section of the deleted version of Die or DIY?,kinds sums up the frustration at the behaviour of persons unknown from this forgotten group.(see the comments section below):

"man, screw these guys and their music. Every time I try to listen to one of their albums, it's been taken down already by the time I get to it. I give up. Fuck em and their music. It might be this or that according to people, but I don't even care to try to listen to it anymore. Sure as hell won't buy any reissues if there are any. Whoever is taking all this shit down is a bitter old wanker, and I hope they are reading this."

DOWNLOAD and solve the mystery HERE!
HERE, and HERE

Scissor Fits - " Taut? Tense? Angular? And Other British Rail Sandwiches." (Dubious Records SJP 793) 1978

An undisputed classic of the DIY pigeon-hole from the year zero of 1978. The rock press were moaning about how crap 1978 was!!!???....it just demonstrates how fucking clueless those tufty haired badge wearing former post hippies were. For us regional types, who weren't allowed access into elitist circles,like Steve Severin, who moaned that punk died during the first gig by the Damned!!??...Not only is this clique inspired elitism, the Damned were the only one of the big three not to sell out to the majors, and they also released a great second album in 1978(late`77 actually,it just sounded like `78.Ed), which was also panned by those tunnel visioned hacks of the music weeklies.
Also ignored was the burgeoning DIY scene, which stood solid with the real punk ideals, championing amateurism , coupled with an admirable lack of ambition.
The Scissor Fits are a shining example of this attitude. No rock stances on this record, which can be heard in the embarrassed to be seen to rock performances' hiding behind some rather obvious attempts at humour.
Its classic plastic, and kicks off with the anthem that is "I Don't Wanna Work For British Airways No More", a definitive anti-boss statement in song form. "A Small One" has to be a 'punk rock' pastiche, and why not? All this and three more potential hit singles, which even threatens to get 'funky' during 'D.H.Laurence Wasn't A Mexican'.

Track Listing:

A1		I Don't Want To Work For British Airways
A2		A Small One
A3		I Wish I Hadn't Shaved My Pubic Hair Off
B1		D.H. Lawrence Wasn't A Mexican
B2		Waiting For Your Love In The Shower

DOWNLOAD some British Rail sandwiches HERE!

The Collective Horizontal - "Crap Game E.P." (Dolmen Records DO-1) 1979

One of thee Definitive records of UK DIY. Its alllll here; apathetic vocals that sound like they're sung in a cardboard box, cheap drum machines played through a cheaper amp in an even cheaper toilet. There's even an appearance from DIY deity, Nag, of The Door and the Window, on WASP synth. Guitars are not the driving instrument we have come to know and love in this post Led Zep era. The six stringed monster is reduced to a barely tuned shivering wreck, lurking in the corner of the toilet block. Cometh the junk shop organ to carry the melody.
Not everyone could afford a white Gibson Les Paul ,like our hero's in the Sexy Pistols, or get our clothes from trendy Kings Road boutiques. We had to make do with charity shop clothes and instruments, and sometimes we would blow bubbles in a half filled bottle of water as an accompanying effect; just one of the many musical highlights on this insane record.
This was the real revolution........"I am an Anarchiiiiiist"....er....no you're not.

Recorded Live in a studio in Mono.

Track Listing:

A1		Crap Game	1:05
A2		Slow Guns	1:40
B1		Edward's Leer	3:30
B2		Beach Coma	3:10
B3		Tortured Meanderings	2:30

DOWNLOAD these tortured meanderings HERE!

Steve Miro And The Eyes ‎– "Rude Intrusions" (Object Music – OBJ 008) 1980

This cover screams Prog Rock,and Steve Miro is obviously an ex-progger adapting (rather well) to a post punk world. Its all there, prominent keyboards, including synthesizer solo's, well played melodic Bass playing, but crammed into the three minute symphony bracket.
There's nothing wrong with this of course, I describe myself as a prog rocker (mainly to wind up boring middle aged/middle class 'punks',aint they becoming the new hippies?), and wasn't post punk, prog rock in disguise anyway? The keyword is 'progressive', not 'Regressive' as in Yes and ELP. Looking to advance the art of modern popular music; and I think Miro achieves this goal in a small understated way.
Anyway, anyone who says Van Der Graaf Generator weren't a great proto-post punk band must be either deaf or stupid! (although Miro is obviously not in the same league as Peter Hammill one might add, but did still tread a similar path.)

Track Listing:

A1		Choke It Back
A2		Hammer And Tongs
A3		Ain't You Got No Life
A4		Making Money
A5		Give Me Back My Dice
A6		Shadow Screen
B1		Gin Video
B2		Breaking
B3		Jeans For China
B4		Good Looking Girl
B5		It's A Long Way To Paris
B6		Stuck For Words

DOWNLOAD some post punk prog HERE!

or to be intruded even ruder....

DOWNLOAD it HERE as well?

Steve Miro And The Eyes ‎– "Second Sentence" (Object Music OBJ015) 1981

Second LP from the ageing progger in post punk cloths, and the budget has increased. A High quality recording, with cleverly structured early eighties alternative pop non-hits.Rather entertaining,if you overlook the hi-fidelity, and the odd irritating Muso touches, like the hideous saxophone playing that crops up from time to time. Should have been a top twenty smash really I suppose.

Track Listing:

A1		Gone Riding
A2		Hit And Run
A3		Something In A Nutshell
A4		Mixed Opinions
A5		Stories To Tell
B1		Stand Inside The Light
B2		Steps Up
B3		Fire Away Son
B4		Hiding It All Away
B5		Mutiny

DOWNLOAD it this second HERE!

Grow Up - "The Best Thing" (Object Music OBJ005) 1979

A fine slice of Proto-Indie pop from the ignored, but badly named Grow-Up. Fourteen, almost catchy, tracks of concise unpretentious pop music. Part of the post punk world that tried to distance itself from the gobbing, leather jacketed Travis Bickles that fucked Punk up forever. It was a subversive act to be able to play an instrument, write eloquent lyrics that didn't rely on expletives, and create songs that you can remember. A quality album full of song-craft, like an nonirritating Spherical Objects record, but better.

Track Listing:

A1		Instrumental (When She Calls)
A2		The Best Thing
A3		Missing
A4		She's Always There
A5		Dear Isobel
A6		Do You Want To Dance
A7		Her Song
A8		Too Much Love
B1		Spilt Tea
B2		Autumn Movie
B3		Golden Promises
B4		No Mirror
B5		The Peak
B6		David

DOWNLOAD and then grow up HERE

Various Artists -"Four Ways Out" (Defensive Records ‎– pact 1) 1980

Picasso strove to paint with the innocence of a child.
Rire: To Laugh, achieved the equivalent for music  effortlessly with their two tracks, then disappeared; never to be heard of again. Such perfection cannot be repeated;to do so would harm this perfection, so the only road left is to retire.
Vision On, a name taken from a popular BBC programme for Deaf kids, never quiet achieve the heights (or lows) of Rire:To Laugh, but they do have a rather pleasant Joe Meek sounding organ,which is always something to admire methinks.
The Mudhutters could well have been real musicians trying to hide their ability;as was the trend of the day.They did have a Diagram Brother in their line-up,one Andy Diagram.....a proper musician if ever there was one. A Proto-Ron Johnson Records sound is evident here,and a noble comparison that is by any standards?
Talking about 'Real' musicians, we have Dislocation dance to finish off this shared LP.
Still active today, and partly responsible around 1979 for the White boy Punky Funk avalanche of the early eighties. Also a favourite of the hipster kids of the early 21st century in the trendier parts of Brooklyn.They also, had Andy Diagram in their line-up...what a busy chap he was,still is?

Sleeve Notes:

4 Ways Out was recorded at Croft Farm, High Legh; June 1980; on 2/4 track; by Mike Evans

4 Ways Out was produced and financed by the bands that appear on it

Tracklist:

A1 – Mud Hutters National Interest
A2 – Mud Hutters Final Action
A3 – Mud Hutters Security
A4 – Rire: To Laugh- Another Shade In The Sky
A5 – Rire: To Laugh- Bacteria
B1 – Vision On -Judgement Day
B2 – Vision On -I Live For Then
B3 – Dislocation Dance -Warm Up
B4 – Dislocation Dance -G Bit
B5 – Dislocation Dance -BUB
B6 – Dislocation Dance -Hiya
Only one way in to DOWNLOAD,but there are four ways out HERE!

Elti-Fits ‎– "EP" and "Peel session 04/09/79" (Worthing Street ‎– WSEF 1) 1980

Herky Jerky Avant-Pop from Manchester,when herky jerky Avant-pop was 'In'! It was also, 'In' ,again, around the turn of the 21st century; when the 'Young' people looked through their 'cool' parents record collection and started playing their XTC records. Then they formed bands like Erase Erata and The Futureheads. So in about fifteen years time we should get another wave of Herky Jerky pop bands, made by kids who will be scanning that old hard drive of their mums and dads  and find some Devo influenced bandwagon jumpers from 2005; then form a band?
Of course, the original wave is always the best in any medium,and the same is true in this case.
Elti-Fits could easily have been XTC,but they were a year or so too late, and maybe a bit too herky jerky!
That said, they were/are criminally ignored and under-represented in the various recorded mediums. One EP, one Peel Session, and the odd live curio (click here) to their name.
Trainspotter fact: Their drummer was one Karl Burns from the classic Fall line-up!

Tracklist:

	1Going Straight
	2Letter Box
	3Their Grip

 Peel Session Tracklist:

1. Factory Room
2. Letter Box
3. Reject
4. Song

04/09/79

DOWNLOAD before you have an elti-fit HERE!