Devil's Witches – "Velvet Magic" (Cursed Tongue Records – CTR-002) 2017

I'm supposed to be doing some obscure Doom Metal aren't I? So....
Devil's Witches from the UK, combines the melodic doomy grooves of carnality and worshiping at the altar of the female?.....it says here!?

They have pictures of ladies Muffs on the cover (a doom obligation),living cheek to jowl with drowned pre-raphaelite nudes floating gracefully in a very clean looking Vietnamese river while Napalm strikes bloom like flowers in My Lai as a backdrop.

They certainly do seem to worship that mysterious creature.....The Lady....yet the music has me questioning the true definition of what Doom Metal actually is,and what it ain't.

No-one is pretending for a minute that 'Devil's Witches'consider themselves a proponent of the Doom idiom at all, but there are undeniable aspects present throughout this Pornadelic....,their words, vintage 70's sounding Stoner metal.....i only got it because of the cover,and it was in the Doom section.It's got a Goat and a saucy temptress facing front as the principle image to draw in the acne scarred artisans of this young male only genre.It in fact looks like one of those cheapo 'Top Of The Pops' albums so popular in Woolworths that nobody were ever seen purchasing one.Pictures of Nudie ladies sell records...Fact.

Parts of it do sound like a soundtrack for the chase or love-making scenes in an Italian gore-nasty video only release from 1981;but there are some worthy Doom elements,and scores high on the entertainment Beaufort scale, and a fair few points on the metal Bristol scale....look that one up.

'Velvet Magic' does indeed sound rather like the name of a mid-range brand of Toilet paper after all?

Tracklist:

1 Apache Snow
2 Motorpsycho
3 Black Cauldron
4 Pornodelic Opium Dreams
5 Voodoo Woman
6 Mountain Of The Devil's Witch
7 Jupiter Kush
8 Velvet Magic
9 Requiem Pour Un Vampire

DOWNLOAD and wipe your ears with some velvet magic HERE!

"Everything" by Katiny Slezki (self-Released on Bandcamp) 2017

I was gonna carry on with my lowdown on rubbish original wave punk follow-up albums,and post every available mix of The Heartbreakers "L.A.M.F.", which is neither rubbish or a follow-up album,but has that same damning 'muddy' sound that bedeviled Punk groups in 1978 onwards.(by the way the best mix turned out to be on "The Found Masters 1977",just edging out the cassette mix)

Of course The Heartbreakers were more accurately labelled Street Rock,who luckily got invited onto the infamous Anarchy tour,and soon picked up the fashion sense of the epoch,leading to a rushed recording session to get an album out before the Pistols.....which everybody managed to do, easily.

Therefore I won't bore you, and myself, with such shameless self-indulgences.

The mean streets of lower Manhattan in 1976 were a holiday camp compared to the isolated and depressing desert of,Thee official coldest,not coolest, city on earth Yatutsk in deepest Siberia,where my bestest favourite Siberian Punk band come from; the rather very good indeed Katiny Slezki.Who are like a cross between a PTSDed Teenage Jesus and the Jerks,with The White Stripes on really baaaaad drugs.

Watching the news today I'm getting very worried for the male members of the band who are prime candidates for getting drafted into the Russian army as canon fodder for the insane objectives of their malfunctioning nation. 

Firstly they are just the people Putin would like to get rid of,and second, they live in the kind of arse-end of the bag place that contains a  population of racially ambiguous  'Russians' who will not be missed by the middle classes in St Petersburg and Moscow.

They've got a lot of crazed stuff on Bandcamp, but I have more that isn't on there,including my fav "Unreleased Tracks 2016 EP".Got some mad numbers on there.

I sincerely hope they avoided the mobilisation,escaped to Mongolia or something,and we shall hear of them again after some brave patriot Offs Putin.

Come back Katiny Slezki we evil westerners love you.

DOWNLOAD everything by Katiny Slezki on their bandcamp HERE!

and

DOWNLOAD everything else that isn't on bandcamp HERE!

Philip Johnson ‎– "Year Of The Black Fridge" (Slackhurst Broadcasting ‎– SLA 01) 2017

Wellies NOT Jackboots!

Jackboots NOT Wellies!

Described as 'Almost Mythical', by the  record bores episodic bible, "Rec-bored Collector" magazine ;the 'almost',which implies 'Not', 'Mythical', Philip Johnson's first vinyl album since "Youth In Mourning" in 1982,is the jolly bizarre"Year Of The Black Fridge". Some of the 220 limited edition copies have the 'controversial' album sleeve art, of two female Nazi camp gaurds,caught in a candid action pose,pesumably from a hidden camera?One of them dedecked in sexy jack boots showing a bit of leg below her regulation SS knee length skirt. The female Nazi is a popular turn at your averge S&M swingers party......so I'm told. The harsh reality was, i'm sorry to disappoint you all, but the ladies in the  SS were by in large, a bunch of angry Munters who hated the world because they were ugly fuckers. Severely beating an attractive Jewess to death was a surefire way of making them feel good about themselves,and still be able to look in a mirror,a feat most women would do anything to achieve.Psychopaths are also narcassists,now matter how hideous they are on the inside or outside,or what sex they are.
Naturally there will be a legion of loners with boners tugging themselves off at the mere prospect of being whipped by a female Deathcamp guard,but to be historically correct, their uniforms were made from a very coarse cheap fabric,and NOT Pvc. Hardly a myth shattering truth for most, but there's always someone, somewhere believing something absurd.
The other rear cover depicts the less 'controversial' image of a young lady with a short skirt and a pair of wellington boot;presumably this is a reference to the heroine of his fetish filled novel "Jeanette" (by his pen name, Joe Simpson Walker),the lead character of who liked to wear wellies, rather than Jackboots, when indulging her dark sexual side of an evening.
This theme does crop up from time to time in Philips work,and "Year Of The Black Fridge" is no exception.

Tracklist:

A1 Junelike (soundtrack) 18:01
B1 The Gackerillo 1:01
B2 Congratulations 4:42
B3 Moap 6b 1:12
B4 I Was Horrified 3:00
B5 Voice Of Liz 2 7:08

DOWNLOAD and defrost HERE!

Jandek - "Austin Tuesday" ( Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0823) 2017

The last post of Jandek Super Monday,and the last Jandek post until i get the latest four CD's.
Dysfunctional beat poetry backed by a primary school chamber quartet sounds like my kinda gig.
Shelia and Sterling Smith share the poetry duties affront scraping violinage,wandering clarinet,harpo marx style plucking,and the odd thud or two on the big bass drum.
Recorded at the Austin Library on the 16th of Feb,2016.

Tracklist:

1 Old Tin Roof 7:33
2 The Doves 5:40
3 The Sparkle 6:37
4 Ultimate Bet 5:18
5 When I Thought 6:45
6 Happy Girl 3:39
7 The Fence 4:53
8 Human Time 2:32
9 The Top 5:24
10 Strangely Serene 2:54
11 The Trembling 4:19
12 Touching My Bed 5:32
13 The Man With The Hat 4:03
DOWNLOAD so everyday is tuesday in austin HERE!

Jandek ‎– "London Residency" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0821) 2017

Happy new Year?????..that's Fake News,but what ain't Fake is the last Jandek Monday of 2018.
What better way than six CDs of Jandek in London to end the worst year politically for the human race since World War2? And maybe an even worse year for our lovely blue planet?
Its only gonna get worse as far as I can see!
The seas are poisoned with micro plastics,during the worst year for the production of greenhouse gases since records began (Incredibly!!!???), making the projected point of no-return in twelve years time looking wildly optimistic! Top that with an oompah loompah in the whitehouse withdrawing from the Paris climate change accord, and Japan resuming commercial whaling, leaving our own extinction a near certainty.Stupid is as Stoopid does,as Stoopid gets whats-a-comin'!
We can't even try to save ourselves because democracy won't allow it!The people have spoken,they want cheap disposable convienience and fuck tomorrow.The idiots in the hi-vis jackets smashing stuff up in Paris and beyond have proved that. "Wot? Green taxes on my diesel fuel???? No way,unless I don't have to pay.Fuck the future,i'm alive today." I know of at least one of these drongos who,one week was protesting in a yellow jacket against feul taxes, then the next week was demonstrating against climate change.....this is a special kind of pure liquid hypocrisy.
That's not to mention the rise of the new incredibly DUMB neo-right,of which the "Gillets Jaune" are very much a part of, which makes "Mien Kampf" look like a reasoned work of well-thought out political philosophy, an insult to the old right.Made up of the detritus of society, moaning about the Romainians next door coming over here and taking our jobs that these lazy morons don't want.
Me?.....I'm gonna have to apply to stay in my own home because of Brexshit,and have my european citizenship revoked....a bit like the intial actions against the Jews in Germany in the 1930s;but at least i don't have to pay for the privilege like EU citizens in the UK will have to do.A different kind of residency to that which Jandek was paid to do in London,but far more incomprehensible!
Lets escape this crap and immerse ourselves in the unpredictable world of 21st century Jandek.On these three nights at Café Oto,we get a jamboree of styles jandeckian;solo acoustic Jandek to funky Jandek, to avant garde Jandek;all assisted by various musicians and, of course, his muse, Sheila, contributing her trademark channeled vocals.Both the Representative and Muse, make the traditional trip around the instrumentation to keep it fresh.Thankfully,he steers clear of the piano,and any neo-classical pretentions on this one.
Lets hope that 2019 sees a resurrection of common sense and decency on our fucked planet,and that Jandek makes a new Studio album......none of this will happen of course.
Tracklisting:

Day One - February 14, 2014
1-1 Trash Man 9:26
1-2 I'm Ready 8:22
1-3 You Ain't Me 7:23
1-4 Who 'Dat 5:56
1-5 Good Night 10:13
1-6 Down South 10:10
2-1 See Ya Later 3:55
2-2 The Devil's Dead 3:01
2-3 You Didn't Respond 4:42
2-4 Mean Anything 3:19
2-5 Chaotic Mind 3:41
2-6 Don't Want Us 3:26
2-7 Down So Low 6:26
2-8 Man On His Back 8:30

Day Two - February 15, 2014
3-1 I Laughed 13:11
3-2 Where's The Cotton 8:10
3-3 I Couldn't Find You 7:06
3-4 Wait A Minute 8:51
3-5 Choctaw Baby 7:18
3-6 The Stars 9:40
4-1 Lost Journey 8:30
4-2 You Told Me 4:03
4-3 Nothing 8:01
4-4 Tell Me 6:27
4-5 Here To Stay 3:33
4-6 Good Madness 2:37
4-7 He Loved Me 2:43
4-8 Twisted Tongue 4:12
4-9 Tripe Tales 4:26
4-10 Vain Thug 6:32

Day Three - February 16, 2014
5-1 The Dark 8:09
5-2 If I Waited Twenty Hours 5:56
5-3 Living With A Cell Phone 4:34
5-4 Downtown Blues 5:52
5-5 Cryin' And Tumblin' 7:48
5-6 Am I Alive 5:18
5-7 Peaches And Cream 2:46
5-8 Vagabond King 4:56
6-1 The Day Of Dread 22:13
6-2 Wall Fall 6:02
6-3 Solitary Sunlight 5:58
6-4 Sad But Over 4:46
6-5 Anyone Else 6:23
6-6 Somebody I'm Not

DOWNLOAD a free uk residency permit HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Dallas Thursday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0824) 2017

Its Jandek Monday in Dallas Thursday.So......
Who needs Miles Davis when we got Jandek playing bass behind a musical picket fence on the grassy knoll of outsider garde Jazz in Dallas?
I'll try and fit in as many JFK assasination references as possible in this short review of yet another Jandek curveball to the head from the Texas Book Depository of improvisation.
Like the Zapruder film, crucial footage was shot of this performance,on May 19th 2016 at the infamous Texas Theatre(Where LHO got arrested), and released on a DVD, which you can pour through in slow motion to prove that this really happened.
Just like any epoch-defining moment in Dallas, the main protagonists sport triple barreled names. Rather than Lee Harvey Oswald, we get get Sterling Richard Smith (the Corwood representative)on Bass, and keyboardist ,Andrew Jordan Miller, with Jazzer Chris Curiel, on Trumpet and normal name.Again we have Sheila Smith with those slightly deranged,almost channeled, assasins vocals.
Another key date at this venue was November 22, 1963 at approximately 1:45 p.m.,when nearly 15 Dallas police officers converged on the Texas Theatre in search of a man who had entered without paying......no not Sterling Richard Smith......I hope.....but none other than Lee Harvey Oswald, who arrived 53 years too early for the Jandek gig.
I think I would have tried to duck in without paying if i knew i was going to see a jazz workout rather than some classic jandek miserablism.....if I wanted to see a cheap rate Miles Davis clone, I'd have gone to another venue.The representative doesn't even sing on this one!
Perhaps this record is the missing link in the conspiracy? Did Jandek fire that fatal bullet from the Grassy knoll and pin it on Oswald? He's certainly old enough, he'd have been 18 in 1963.I reckon he offed JFK for the CIA, and they placed him on an identity reassignment program to hide him, and that new ID was as a musician, even though he had no musical ability whatsoever.
This would explain a lot! Would also explain as to why he was so keen to hide his identity,and less than forthcoming about his life history.
I think I'm onto something here!
Basically It was Jandek wot dunnit!
He probably killed Miles Davis too....he certainly did on may 19th 2016 in the Texas Theatre.
No, i'm only joking, it's rather good actually....even if it is by a suspected murderer.

Tracklisting:

1 Special One 6:53
2 Vacancy 6:19
3 Despair 7:13
4 Sorrow 6:59
5 Calm My Heart 6:28
6 Love Denied 5:48
7 Plans 5:32
8 Numb 5:34
9 Certainty 5:23
10 A Dream 6:17
11 Heartless 5:42
12 Substitute For Love 8:25

DOWNLOAD this substitute for jazz HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Houston Friday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0825) 2017

Still in Houston for Jandek Monday, this one was on a friday.
Jandek croons over an improvised medley of iron curtain arthouse animation music. Lots of minimal tinkling on a keyboards 'vibes' setting, probably by Sheila Smith methinks.The music is hardly there in fact. I can just imagine a leading contemporary dance coreographer salivating at the prospects of squandering their arts council grant on creating a modern ballet for this,and it being devoured by an audience of bespectacled ,shaven headed, art critics,nodding knowingly to each other......if only they really knew?

Tracklisting:

1-1 These Things 13:45
1-2 Cure For The Toolbox 8:22
1-3 Turn To This 7:51
1-4 Wild Places 12:37
2-1 Next Monday 7:35
2-2 One And Only 6:57
2-3 Where I Came 6:13
2-4 Black Cotton Chair 8:40
2-5 It Burned Down Nice 4:42
2-6 My Body 5:06
2-7 Edge Of Time 5:56

DOWNLOAD jandek for the ballet rambert HERE!

Various ‎Artists – "The Whispering Trees (A Compilation of Belgian Cold Wave and Post Punk 79-86)" (Walhalla Records ‎– WR013) 2017

They call it 'Cold Wave' nowadays. The art of angst ridden soullessness delivered with a chilled passionless passion. Joy Division has a lot to answer for; but we are eternally grateful for this legion of copycat miserablists preserved on the end of a rope for this collection of happy-go-lucky Belgian depressives from the beginning of the 1980s.
So,shut yourself in your funerial-themed bedroom and enjoy the sparce, sombre, delights of some vintage low country Cold Wave from the arse end of the cold war era.

Tracklist:

1–Secret Life - Passing Day 04:36
2–Siglo XX - Dreams Of Pleasure (Live Bilzen) 05:36
3–Vibø - Clinical Death 04:00
4–Die Rote Fabrik - Murder 04:57
5–Nausea - No Conversation Between People 04:01
6–Struggler - The Other Side 01:59
7–Onderbronders - Vlaamsche Deerne 03:11
8–Trefoil - Tata 03:32
9–Rank Z'Heroes - The Storm 03:49
10–O Veux - A Face A Mask 02:56
11–Entrée En Gare De La Ciotat - In My Arms 02:43
12–De Brassers - Geluiden Tegen Gezag 03:34
13–10 Kleine Snobs - Zomerhit 02:38

DOWNLOAD some belgian whispers HERE!

The Manchester Mekon ‎– "No Forgetting (The Album)" (Discos Transgénero ‎– TRANS-3) 2017

Sticking in Manchester,we got the Manchester mekon,who,as members of the manchester musicians Collective, appeared on the "A Manchester Collection" compilation,on Object Music....as previously featured on these pages.
During the 'Punk Rock Revolution',there was always the visible prescence of flare wearing long-hairs who seemed to carry on as if nothing had changed.....which made them more 'Punk' than the legions of denim and leather clad sheeple that destroyed it all.

The Manchester Mekon was made up of several of such persons,who preferred King Crimson to Eater, and Frank Zappa to Slaughter and the Dogs.

Prog tendancies are indeed revealed on a few of these mostly unreleased tunes;but also a nod in the direction of fey 'indie' style songs that wouldn't have been out of place in the 'C-86' era.

Be yourself, was the mantra during the 'Punk' years,but so few actually did.

Over a period of five years (1977 - 1982) the Manchester Mekon played about fifty gigs in and around Manchester, released seven tracks on local labels and rehearsed once a week. This album covers their entire career, contains the full range of music they played and includes live recordings, studio recordings, home recordings and even rehearsals. Two tracks were previously only available on Manchester Musicians' Collective compilation albums. Some were never released, until this Cd surfaced a couple of years back.

(Check their sole EP HERE!)

"A small but brilliant body of home-spun, humbly-recorded pop and experiment that feels, to these ears, like one of the ultimate representations of the warmth and generosity of the UK DIY era."
- Jon Dale(the bloke who wrote the sleevenotes)

Disco Transgenaro bandcamp link for more stuff click here!
They 'work hard' apparantly!?..see comments

Tracklist:

A1 The Note 3:17
A2 The Idle Gnome Expedition 3:58
A3 The Cake Shop Device 4:57
A4 San Sebastian 2:46
A5 No Forgetting 2:54
A6 Approaching A Russian Caravan (Part I) 1:38
A7 Girl Games 2:31
B1 Book Of Toads 3:30
B2 Must Have More -> Wheels 3:19
B3 Film Music 5:06
B4 Soft Soap 3:00
B5 Ignorance Of The Crunds 5:15
B6 Jonathon Livingston Seafood 3:25

Don't forget to DOWNLOAD it HERE!

Strobe Talbot ‎– "Funland" (Moone Records ‎– MR032) 2017

I've got a headache from a weekend of excess and too much spring sun,but what did I find in my inbox this morning?.....only the most recent LP from Strobe Talbot!
Headphones on,headache gone.
Jad,Mick,Benb,and notable chums return after a short gap of 14 years as if time didn't exist.
Jad Fair continues to speak in a kind of tongues that bypasses the strait-jacket of adulthood ,ably backed up by the ever inventive Mick Hobbs, and the tumbling stickwork of Benb Gallaher.
There ain't many records from 2017 i'd happily post on this blog, but there are obvious exceptions, this being one,and anything I'm on of course (New ZOG and Scouts of Uzbekistan coming up in 2018).
Whats more is that this fine record was released in a strictly limited edition of 100, pressed on very attractive (is that marbled?) blue vinyl, and allegedly is the first LP to be pressed with a 'Morphing Hollogram'?....see this phenomenon in action HERE!

The news is that a second edition of 300(!) is now ready to relieve you all of the contents of your piggy banks,for only 25 bucks plus shipping from Moone Records. A beautiful thing it is too.
I suppose this is an advert?....but its for a worthy cause I guess?

Tracklist:

A1 On The Go
A2 Forever
A3 Superstar
A4 Werewolf Of The Timberland
A5 The Awakening
A6 All At Once
A7 Made That Way
A8 Alien Dead
A9 With Sprinkles
A10 1-Letter Alphabet
A11 Hunger
A12 Evil Of Frankenstein
A13 I Don't Know
A14 I Love You
B1 Poetic Heart
B2 Blame It On...
B3 The Token Waltz
B4 A New Day
B5 Pretty Flowers

Usually i'd offer it up for free downloading, but I guess they wanna sell 'em to break even,so............Place your order HERE!

This Is Not This Heat - "Live @u Cent Quatre, Paris- 15/03/2017"

I often complain about groups reforming to earn a bit of dough,and in the process tarnishing a legend that was best left unblemished.
This is not the case with 'This Is Not This Heat' however, who have respected their former groups legacy by recognising that certain members are no longer with us, and therefore this is something quite different. A kind of tribute,and reinvention of their past group rather than a nostalgia trip for cash.Hence the title of the project ensures that we know that this is definitely not 'This Heat'. A lot of other groups who reform around one or less members should use that epithet, like This is Not Dr Feelgood, or This is Not Bucks Fizz.
This Heat's legend has grown immeasurably in the 21st century, and inevitably the demand for some kind of product was bound to result in some kind of reincarnation by the remaining members,although the late Gareth Williams' replacement Trefor Goronwy is absent (i suppose this carries on the welsh connection still further?).
The two Charles's, Hayward and Bullen, are augmented by a number of 'guests' to plough through the This Heat back catalogue,including the traditional improvisation, and sound as if they had never left us.
All recorded in the highest quality you've ever heard these songs captured live in (The first time ever in the case of "24 Track loop"/Repeat!).Fantastic.
I love this group and I have no problem with them trying to get some meagre recompense for their monumental legacy. They can do anything they want to do, and more to the point they are more than capable of doing it, which is also rare in these delicate cases.

Track Listing:

1- Testcard (0:25)
2- Horizonatal Hold (7:19)
3- Not Waving (6:17)
4- Improvisation (1:08)
5- Twilight Furniture (4:49)
6- Music ike escaping gas (4:56)
7- The Fall Of Saigon (6:09)
8- Independence (5:14)
9- Cenotaph (7:44)
10- SPQR (3:28)
11- A New Kind Of Water (5:36)
12- Paper Hats (2:46)
13- Makeshift Swahili (part one)(5:17)
14- Makeshift Swahili (Part Two) (5:34)
15- Sleep (2:36)
16- Introduction of the Guests
17- 24 Track Loop (6:29)
18- Health and Efficiency (9:45)

This IS a DOWNLOAD HERE!