"П​р​и​т​о​н (Den)" + "Live 2018" by Притон (Den) - (Youth Of The North ) 2016/8

Yakutsk Siberia, December 2016, with an outside temperature of around -43°C (-45°F), Притон,or in the king's English,"Den", (so named after a Russian word to describe the dens where drug users and criminals gather...oooer! Mummy!) locked themselves inside their studio to record a self-titled album with a Tascam CC-222 tape recorder. Not sure this would exempt themselves from Putin's medieval mobilisation of anyone with at least one leg,but it should. That murdering cunty mcCuntface,Putin, likely has no idea where Yakutsk is.....but then again nor do we.Ask an American where England is and he'll say that you can drive to it by going north from New York;ask him where Yakutsk is and he'll probably punch you.

Watch out Ukraine Притон are coming!

Digital technology has never sounded so bad.Making the most sophisticated of sound systems sound like its been played back through a 70's telephone receiver. An altogether sludgier, fuzzier, experience than fellow Yakutsk inmates Katiny Slezki, whom we all adore of course....don't we boys and girls?

Proves that not all Russians are genocidal barbarians, child rapists and thieves...just most of them...as far as I know anyway.Indeed, one never knows but its quite possible that as I write this the male members of Den have probably already been forced to kill old men and rape children with their commanding officer making sure they follow orders at gunpoint.All this eight time zones of distance between them and home.In fact i live closer here in France to Ukraine than the residents of Yakutsk do.At least they should be safe from the first tranche of nuclear fall-out,unless they've all been conscripted.

Let's look on the bright side shall we(?), at least there'll be plenty of hardcore stuff to write about for the next album?.....that's if they haven't had their skulls crushed under the tracks of a stolen Russian T-90 driven with alacrity by battle hardened laughing Ukrainians.In which case these are probably the last П​р​и​т​о​н albums for the foreseeable future.....puts a new angle on breaking up I suppose.....those crazy rock'n'rollers.

Tracklist:

Притон:

1. Портвейн 01:05
2. В лесу ебутся кошки 01:05
3. Притон 00:51
4. Сойти с ума от холода 00:57
5. Хэй Рокеры 01:42
6. Танцуй шлюха 00:41
7. Антихрист 01:27

Live 2018 but will they be a-live in 2023?

LIVE 2018:

1. ПРИТОН 00:53
2. АНТИХРИСТ 02:00
3. ПОРТВЕЙН 01:04
4. В ЛЕСУ ЕБУТСЯ КОШКИ 01:46
5. ТАНЦУЙ ШЛЮХА 00:38
6. РОКЕРЫ 02:14

DOWNLOAD some cool from out of the cold with sub-zero effort HERE!

Susan Alcorn ‎– "Evening Tales" (Mystra Records ‎– mystra #18) 2016

On the Jandek in Fort Worth review,one was struck by the strange wobbly Steel Guitar playing,which sounded like an off-kilter pressing of a vinyl album played at 27.5 rpm. Traditionally the guests and the representative himself are never credited on the sleeve.Therefore i mistakenly accused the Steel Guitarist of being either drunk or an imbecile. Then i found out it was none other than serious improviser Susan Alcorn on the strings. Well, i'm so fickle and startstruck by anyone that i'm told is a genius, that I instantly change my opinion to follow the rest of the Hive and saturate the page with sycophantic plaudits.......Oh she's so talented,a genius,unique,no-one else like her etc....especially as she plays alot with that other female improv leg-end, LaDonna Smith ,a mate of the late Davey Williams and the Trans Museq crew.

This album is one of her more tuneful,like some dying Hawaiian guitar record slowly melting near the crater of a volcano whilst being attacked by ants.

She still might be drunk,and why not(?) but she certainly is probably not an imbecile?

Tracklist:

A1 Sapphire 4:26
A2 An Evening Tale 5:38
A3 The Healer (For Diane Keener) 9:31
A4 Lourdes In Marigolds 1:04
B5 Circular Ruins 7:09
B6 Milonga En Re (Menos Menos) 4:48
B7 Allegreto For David 3:41
B8 Tuwhera 1:40
B9 Hino Galego 3:03

DOWNLOAD some tales for a cosy but creepy winters evening HERE!

Mystery Plane ‎– "Still Life" (Color Disc ‎– COLOR LP 04) 1981/2016

This record was originally a demo cassette made in 1981 that was hawked around record labels with a view for release. Color Tapes later released a 100 copies edition.......it says.

Mystery Plane was basically a Modern Art/ Lives Of Angels color Tapes sooper groop, plus a new singer who sounds not unlike an young English Stan Ridgeway at times,american inflections and all.

Singer aside, what we're served with is an electronic neo-psych indie pop musical tapas which trys, reasonably hard, to make foot tapping pop tunes for the disenfranchised student type.

Tracklisting:

A1 Telephone
A2 This Is Your Life
A3 Something To Prove
A4 Tightrope
A5 Someone Else
A6 Poor John
B1 Crying Again
B2 Death Sentence
B3 (Do The) Shah Of Iran (Twist)
B4 Still Life
B5 Silence After Midnight

DOWNLOAD if you're still alive HERE!

Jandek ‎– "New Orleans Monday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0822) 2016

It's monday again, so it must be 2009, New Orleans,Jandek,with Piano, in a live setting?
Not much music is as perfect for a Monday than Jandek improvising on a piano for one hour? Ably backed up on,what sounds like a steel guitar,Theremin or some kind of effected electronics by Sheila.
If I turned up for a Jandek gig, and they wheeled out the Piano, I'm sure I would leave the auditorium immeadiately, probably without asking for my twenty dollars back.
The bonus is, we get another photo of Jandek as child,with that classic off-center kodak instamatic effect that dogged everyones photo album in the 60's and seventies. Another piece to force into the Jandek jigsaw puzzle?
Maybe he's a real life replicant (from "Do Androids Dream Of Electric Sheep"),and these photo's were part of the personality implants that gave the androids their feelings of 'self'? That would explain a whole lot, except his longevity.
One things for sure, this fellow certainly enhances ones own existential crisis to an uncomfortable level.

Tracklisting:

1. The Fantasy (59:12)

DOWNLOAD the fantasy that jandek is a pianist HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Houston Thursday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0818) 2016

Jandek Monday stays in Mr Smiths home town of Houston for Jandek Thursday, where we find our hero playing some short improvised Avant Rock numbers for his public.
Well,I think Jandek is good, even if he seems to have sported a Donald Trump hair do and beard combination at some stage in his long life.
One of my bestest favourite groups of all time are 'God Is My Co-Pilot', and Jandek in Houston on Thrsday July 12th 2012 reminds one very much of said group. Short improvised songs that fall apart, both in rehearsal and in the actual concert. With Sterling the  'Representative' on discordant,distorted electric guitar partnered by Sheilas stream of consciousness singing which largely inspires above a largely uninspiring rhythm section of a couple of uncredited found musicians ;who plod along in a standard alt-rock style,juxtaposing the generic with the unclassifiable.
This could be my favourite 21st century Jandek album?......until next week at least.

Tracklisting:

Rehearsal

1 You're Here 2:01
2 Louder 1:53
3 Take It Off 1:38
4 Garage Apartment 2:57
5 Oh Yeah 1:44
6 My Problem 1:20
7 My Heart Beats 1:37
8 Insane Is Too Much 1:32
9 Just A Rehearsal 1:23

Concert
10 My Letters 2:41
11 Emergency 2:28
12 Your Designs 1:45
13 Dallas Bitches 2:01
14 On The Metro 2:23
15 Walk Talk Leave 2:53
16 Asked For A Refund 3:20
17 Can't Hear You 2:24
18 Floor 2:32
19 Chit Chat 2:24
20 Sit On Your Feet 2:25
21 Not Think 2:51
22 Books That I Read 3:03
23 Beholden To You 3:32
24 People Will Talk 3:40
25 Galveston 2:48
26 Glass Boxes 10:00

DOWNLOAD thirsty for jandek on thursday HERE!

Various Artists ‎– "Underground Wave Volume 5" (Walhalla Records ‎– WR011) 2016

Voila! A fifth volume of forgotten Belgian minimal synth from the pre-cambrian waters of electronic pop, unearthed by Walhalla Records for your entertainment.This was from a time,the Eighties, when Technology was our friend not our controller, and didn't spy on our shopping habits, or track our movements.A time when our brains were in our skulls,except when we were on drugs,instead of in a handheld machine that hypnotises our children.Where's Pol Pot when you need him huh?Perhaps thats too extreme?What we need is a form of musical Neo-Luddism to reclaim the job of humanity in the arts Industry? Better still remove Industry out of the arts all together,or even nationalise it all and provide a guaranteed state income?
One thing i am actually proud of from my hometown of Leicester(UK) is the initiation of the Ludditte movement by angry weaver Ned Ludd, when he smashed up two weaving machines in 1779; exactly two hundred years before the automisation of the pop industry began.
Yeah Ok, i am guilty of using technology to 'rob' artists of royalties maybe, but it was technology that provided their work-free lifestyles in the first place.We are helping musicians reclaim the honesty in their vocation by incentivising actually working for a living, like the rest of us,or rejecting the despicable 'music for profit' principle. That's all Ned wanted....an honest days work for an honest days pay. The days of Led Zepplin jetting around like super-rich decadent dandies are well and truly over thanks to the Internet.Major record companies are nearing bankruptcy, and self-releases are now the norm.Exactly what 'Punk Rock' failed to achieve in its short lifetime.Yes kids, technology is a force of Good after all?

Tracklisting:

A1 –7 A Nou - Victims 03:25
A2 –RDP - So You 04:05
A3 –Analysis - Gravity Dance 03:21
A4 –No Unauthorized - J'Attends 03:37
A5 –Nacht Und Nebel - Robot Robot 02:50
A6 –Dead Man Industry - Desorientation In Grey 04:15
B1 –Schicksal - Deceived 03:00
B2 –Unidentified Man - Defaced Places 04:03
B3 –Breast Implosion - Galoppin' Gertie 04:28
B4 –Man Without World - All Nymphs Are Volcanic 04:35
B5 –Vita Noctis - Hymn 03:18
B6 –Kunzysteem - Brighter Than Light 03:22

DOWNLOAD from electronic walhalla HERE!

Jandek ‎– "Dublin Friday" (Corwood Industries ‎– CORWOOD 0820) 2016

Its Jandek Monday, and this is "Dublin Friday", for the simple reason that someone asked for this because they were 'there'!
This is my equivalent of 'playing for the kids'. That brown nosed gesture a lot of performers do to please the crowd by playing their greatest hits or, as in this case, requests.
 As i write, Jandek in Dublin is playing, and he just exhaled the line, 'The Cacophony Of Gesture', which i think places brackets rather cosily around my sycophancy.
Something Jandek never does, but of late he does ,unintentionally ,occassionaly, gives them what they want.
Live at The Douglas Hyde Gallery, Dublin,  June 13, 2008, the representative gives the 'kids' classic old school Jandek; without any hanger-on avant garde musicians to ruin the beauty. Meandering detuned ascoutic guitar, and stream of consciousness vocals under the working title of "He Said Nothing";of which there are eight long parts.

'He's just making this up as he goes along', they say....well......yes, thats usually how the creative process occurs. For me, as well as our esteemed Corwood representative.

There's some polite applause, art gallery style, from the audience in between each part. One can only imagine the modest crowd sitting in silence for each 8 minute part, staring passively at the spectacle in front of them;some feigning an intellectual connection with the ginger one (Check out the keen applauder who clapped the longest after part eight!...Lol!). Mostly waiting patiently for,an end, thee end,any end. Trying not to check their wrist-watches,or be seen to leave early........a bit like life?......very Jandekian.

Tracklist:

He Said Nothing
1 Part One 8:47
2 Part Two 7:18
3 Part Three 8:36
4 Part Four 8:17
5 Part Five 8:10
6 Part Six 7:18
7 Part Seven 5:42
8 Part Eight 8:24

DOWNLOAD jandek in dub (lin) HERE!

Half Japanese ‎– "Perfect" (Joyful Noise Recordings ‎– JNR183) (2016)

Yeah, Mick Hobbs of 'The Work' fame, has been a member of Half Japanese for 28 years,since 1990!
Which is the reason for posting a modern, David Fair-less, 1/2 Japanese lp. The music is fair-ly radio friendly american Indie Rock, with an abnormally subdued Jad Fair providing the singing.....maybe he misses his brother? It doesn't stand up to their earlier wild untutored standards, but this always happens when a version of a classic group get back together, minus certain key-members; the same thing happened to Pere Ubu,who also resorted to radio-friendly Indie, probably to fulfill some offers to play a few Avant-Rock nostalgia shows to earn some belated income from the upwardly mobile. This is happening more and more with those bloody awful festivals choc-a-block with dancing dads freaking out to alternative groups with one original member 're-forming' after a 20 year lay off.
I can see it now, Half-Japanese and Pere Ubu playing at the Dingleberry Festival alongside Dolly Parton and Neil Diamond.The swelling crowd of 50-something baby-boomers paying 200 quid a pop, to sing-a-long to "30 Seconds over Tokyo" and "Forever in Blue Jeans"......rock is definitely very DEAD!

Tracklist:

That Is That
We Cannot Miss
You And I
Perfect
Hold On
Man Without A Shadow
Here We Are
Listen To Your Heart
We'll Go Far
That's Called Love
In Your Spell
A New Beginning
That's Right

DOWNLOAD but its far from perfect HERE!

Harmonia ‎– "Documents 1975" (Grönland Records ‎– CDGRON152) 2016

Long lost and forgotten recordings of Harmonia in actionin 1975,as archived by Berlin School electronicist Asmus Tietchens, who provides the liner notes.
He mentions, Beckett's play "Krapps Last Tape", which is appropriate, not as a reference to using recorded sound as memories, but as a testament, or a document, to the fact that this tape isn't Krap, with one 'P'. In fact its some of the best Harmonia on record,and some thanks for this goes to Mani Neumeier(drums)of Guru Guru who adds some much needed looseness to the proceedings, and therefore,strays somewhat from basic 'Motorik' principles.
As always with Moebius and Roedelius, some of the keyboard sounds remind one of the presets on a Casiotone, as a juxtaposition between muzak and the avant-garde; always an interesting place to inhabit.

Tracklist:

Tiki-Taka At Harmonia Studio In Forst 6:28
Live At Onkel Pö In Hamburg 9:12
Proto-Deluxe At Harmonia Studio In Forst 4:30
Live At Fabrik In Hamburg 11:38

1: Tiki-Taka at Harmonia Studio in Forst (1975)
2: Live at Onkel Pö in Hamburg (1975)
3: Proto-Deluxe at Harmonia Studio in Forst (1975)
4: Live at Fabrik in Hamburg (1975)

2+4: Culled from the tape archives of Asmus Tietchens.
1+3: Culled from the M.R. tape archives in Forst.

DOWNLOAD harmoniously from 1975 HERE!

The Pop Group - "The Boys Whose Head Exploded (live 1979-80)" (Freaks R Us FREAK20LP) 2016

File under Post-Punk.

This is post-punk with zero per cent progressive content, thirty-three and a third funk and soul.A sprinkling of free Jazz and Dub,you name it, its in there.Which I guess is a definition of 'Post-punk' after it was released from the straitjacket of its rocky predecessor.

The preachy nature of the Pop Groups manifesto like lyrics tends to get on ones proverbial tits, and the dance-ability irks somewhat as a nod towards the commerciality they allegedly detested.

Then, the cherry on the top, they go and reform as slightly rotund middle-aged blokes, to earn some dough.....ironically they still play "We Are All Prostitutes" but now in the style of a Haircut One Hundred tribute band.

What we have here are ten live cuts from 1979 to 1980, all of which verge on the cusp of total chaos.

Bruce Smith (the drummer), has the particular distinction of playing in two of the worst reformed groups from this specific epoch; namely The Pop Group, and PiL. They both should take a leaf out of This Heats book of how to do things;starting with make good music , and then call themselves 'This Is Not.... The Pop Group'.In the case of PiL, they should have used the prefix 'This Is Not...' from about 1982.

Tracklist:

We Are All Prostitutes (Live Milan 1980)
Justice (Live Cologne 1980)
How Much Longer (Live Cologne 1980)
Blind Faith (Live Sheffield 1979)
Forces Of Oppression (Live Cologne 1980)
There Are No Spectators (Live Cologne 1980)
Feed The Hungry (Live Cologne 1980)
Rob A Bank (Live Milan 1980)
Shake The Foundations (Live Cologne 1980)
73 Shadow Street (Live Helsinki 1980)

DOWNLOAD the boys whose waistlines expanded HERE!

Prutsers - "Volume 3" - (Year Zero Records YEAR040) 2016

You want more hopelessly obscure Dutch DIY dabblings from the eighties do you?
Thankfully Year Zero Records has cobbled together a Third(?)  volume of lunacy from Rotterdam nutters The 'Prutsers'.

Jan and Henk engaging in some light reading before an evening in front of the Television

Henk, Jan and Robo, bring you the usual,and the very unusual, madness from the squatlands of Rotterdam in the early to mid 1980's.
Robot voices mix with accordions,toy instruments, cheap samplers, and pots and pans, as The Residents get blended with Danny and the Dressmakers in a broken sonic liquidizer, then poured slowly into your ear.

Jan and Henk relaxing at home

Just think with a moments horror, what would have happened to Prutsers if they were rich, had top of the range equipment; then got put into a recording studio with a top Producer......you'd end up with something like Westlife probably, instead of Pondlife.
For sheer inventiveness alone this is worth the price of a FREE download!....surely.....its funny as well!

Jan and Robo enjoying some spare time

Track Listing:

1 In Den Beginnen
2 Love is the Drug
3 Modern Ridderverhaal
4 Mijn Naam Is Hector de Computer
5 Als u Het Niet Aanzien Wil
6 Let's All Chant
7 Wouterje
8 Der Buurman
9 In Mijn Huis Woont een Spook
10 Ein Stuck Von Mir
11 Prutsers but made by ton van Hammond
12 Foggy Days Are Here Again
13 Ontevreden met het Heden
14 Hobabaloeka
15 Kleuter Medley
16 In Perfect Evenwicht
17 Paperclip Polka
18 Pecos Bill
19 Struisvogel ei
20 To The Point
21 Zware Kost
22 Heartbreak Hotel

DOWNLOAD a third volume of drug crazed dutch weirdness from the eighties HERE!

Scouts Of Uzbekistan - "Hate is Our religion" (Year Zero Records YEAR039) 2016

In keeping with the current theme of 'Hate', its only fitting that we feature the latest Scouts Of Uzbekistan album. A parable for these uncertain times.
At last, after 6 looooong years, we have the new album from Scouts of Uzbekistan!!!!?.....the long awaited follow up to "Fun Lovin' Muslims" (YEAR001).
The trademark Scouts sound of improvised drums and Bass, combined with speech samples and Noise is very much still their raison d'etre.A kind of Post-Post rock?
This time with an extended line-up.
Mark carolan drums and Guitar, J.Zchivago Bass, guitar, Noise and samples, Christophe Medina Drums and Percussion, and Nadine Aleman, Korg MS20.
Dedicated to Donald J. Trump.

Track Listing:

1 Nude tuesday (4:42)
2 E.T. Phone Homophobe (4:53)
3 The Perception Of Doors (12:11)
4 She Came From Lincoln (5:50)
5 Portable Slave Toilet 5:35)
6 Release the Kraken (8:56)
7 And So Cometh The Christ Android 6:00)
8 Five Reasons To Love Me 6:01)
9 Hansel and Zombie (4:38)
10 I Am The Alter-Destiny (5:54)

DOWNLOAD Hate as your religion HERE!

ZOG - "Thee First Commandment Of ZOG" (Year Zero records YEAR038) 2016

Free improvised Jazz/Noise Rock from deepest France. Featuring former Electric Buttocks anchorman, Christophe Medina on drums and vocals, Blind Man Walking Phil Allison on Tenor Saxophone, erstwhile 'Outsider' Nadine Aleman, knob twiddling on the Korg MS10, and Sampler, with Jon Zchivago clawing his own raw path on,what can only be described as a, Bass Guitar.
All music is improvised in one take,with no rehearsals or discussion beforehand,and only the minimum of editing afterwards. Like a Dogma 95 for music.
ZOG channels every dead or dying musician's soul from the last 60 years of popular music, as if remote viewed from one of the plusher corners of purgatory. If this doesn't excite you, you're dead already.
For terrestrial references, think Archie Shepp fronting Can's better half of Suzuki and Liebezeit , with a dash of Hawkwind, and Jean Jacques Burnel gene spliced with Bootsy Collins; a sort of funkier version of John Zorn's Painkiller without the boring dub bits. 

PS...ZOG is avaiable for gigs,festivals,bar mitzvah's and children's partys. Leave any possible leads in the comments section.

Track Listing:

1 - The Smell of ZOG
2 - ZOG brings World Peace
3 - Kneel Before ZOG!
4 - Horses In Love
5 - Faster ZOG, Kill, Kill!
6 - O'Dowd's Spunk Bucket Hostage
7 - Sexyback by Timberlake
8 - Man Bites ZOG
9 - Raining In My Brain
10- ZOG 3:16

ZOG commands you to DOWNLOAD it HERE!

"Dilly Ding Dilly Dong: No-one Listened To Our Songs (a Die or DIY tribute to Leicester City FC) " - (a DIE or DIY? mixtape No.9)

An achievement that was ten times more unlikely than the discovery of the Loch Ness Monster has happened! The People's Champions have been crowned.Leicester City strike a blow for the common man, and raise a rigid middle finger to the Murdoch controlled Football mafia.
Where,exactly, is Leicester (pronounced less-ter, or Less-toh in the slovenly local dialect)? 
Its located in the geographical center of jolly old England,at junction 21 of the M1 motorway,40 miles east of Birmingham,and 20 miles south of Nottingham.Home town of such luminaries as Englebert Humperdinck,David Icke,Dickie and David Attenborough,joking Joe Merrick aka 'The Elephant Man', and Roy from Coronation Street.Not forgeting that Richard the Third was buried in a car park there until recently; who's rediscovery and subsequent re-internment  seemed to be a catalyst for a change in the City's international profile.Culminating in 2016's unlikely Premier League triumph for the Local Football team,Leicester City FC;aka 'The Foxes',formerly 'The Filberts' after previous home ground Filbert street got demolished.
As a Foxes supporter of nigh on forty years,the unlikely story of my favourite Footy team winning association Football's most coverted trophy has stirred some deeply buried emotions over the past year or so. Yes, i've made inexplicable journeys to Middlesborough on a tuesday evening to join 500 other sad adults watch our lads get beat 2-0 at Ayresome park; one of the planets worst sporting cess pits.Or endure the six hour round trip to Newcastle to see us lose 7-1,while being 'entertained'(?) by Lindisfarne celebrating their promotion.
If you've ever been 'coined' by the human animals of Millwall at Cold Blow lane, as I have, on a freezing boxing day; while your team loses 2-0 again? Then maybe you will understand,and allow me a tear or two, as my torturer's actually win something 'important'....and with comparative ease to boot!?
I'm old enough to remember when Football (Soccer to our American readers), was a working class pastime rather than a Plutocrats playground. It was an era when any club could win the championship purely by teamwork, tactics, and developing young talent. It wasn't dictated by how many stolen billions some half interested Oligarch ploughed into his new boy toy. Clubs from the arseholes of the UK got to win the main prize quite often, like Derby County (Boo!), Nottingham F*#@+t (Boooo!), and Ipswich Town.
No longer do the little people of the slave classes get to have any simple joy, as the slave owners have bought all their places,and replaced the terraces with soundproofed (?) executive suites,for Champagne business lunches during the games.
The teams too are populated by strutting millionaire preening peacocks; the lowest paid of whom earn more in a week than the excluded underclasses can earn in five,or more, years.
The clubs themselves determine their own success by how many millions they spend on these narcissistic intellectual minnows. Thus crushing the ,so-called, smaller clubs ambitions to merely hoping for survival.
Leicester City FC once tried to compete with the upper echelons by splashing the cash that they didn't have; prompted by then Manager Martin O'Neil, who moaned constantly about New Stadiums, and increased wages.The club provided everything he had asked for, only for the cunt to fuck off to Glasgow Celtic?????....why?) Frequently heard from the supporters was the beyond dumb inquisitory grunt of "Where's the Muneh(local accent for the word Money) gone?"; there was even a 'fanzine' called "Where's the Money Gone?".
Where did the money go? 
Into the pockets of the increasingly swaggering Leicester City first Team squad, and the bank accounts of the Construction companies naturally.The 'fans' could never understand why Pele,Best,and Cryuff never played for Leicester City.This pressure,of course led to bankruptcy and administration, only to be saved by grinning local Leicester footy superstar and legend, Gary Lineker, with support from Serbian 'businessman' Milan Mandaric. 
I suppose we did win a couple of minor trophies in the early noughties (League cup x2),but nearly Lost our football team in the process.
Then in walked our saviours, the Duty-Free kings of Thailand; listen carefully, I shall say this only once: the Srivaddhanaprabha family;inflictors of the horrendous 'King Power' brand name.
Swiftly they brought in Buddhist monks to pray for success, paid off all debts,and bought back the 'Walkers Stadium', then promptly renamed it the, gulp, 'King Power Stadium'.
From here began an unprecedented run of success, rising from the third tier back into the premier league as relegation favourites in 2014/15.
Oh how the bloated cheats of the 'Big' clubs smugly smirked as we(LCFC) propped up the table for two thirds of the season. Then, apparently doomed, we started to win ALL of our games, and survived to struggle another day......except we didn't struggle, we continued to win all of our games in the following(this) season; including highlights such as destroying the most bloated billionaire club of them all,the Shiek's plaything Manchester City, at their own ground.The very club who were the template of 'How to Buy Success',what a bunch of wankers they are!? (just to wind up the geezer who writes the 'Bleak Bliss' blog).
Then amidst all this enduring success we've had to endure the patronising verbal vomit of football 'Pundits', who, for the last year and a half have predicted Leicester's impending collapse,in between sickening references to 'Football Fairytales'. This is no 'Fairytale',they won the premier league trophy because they were the best team, no Fairydust,or cash, required. A carefully balanced formula, of solid defense, lightening fast counter-attacking,played by an organised team of motivated journeymen and bargain buys that moulded into this well-oiled machine.
This, admittedly, may not have any great longevity however. I can sense ,PFA Footballer of the Year, Rihyad Mahrez has thoughts of that big money move to Barcelona written all over his performances,as he virtually disappeared from the game for the last five matches;designer Chav and top scorer, Jamie Vardy, has developed the beginnings of a swagger that could lead to his ruination.Also, that fearless brand of pacey counter-attacking football has turned into dour Italian style defense,grinding out cleansheets.
But so what? Leicester City winning the League Crown just once, is worth all the titles those big money boys have ever bought, all put together in one shiny dustbin.Yes i'm bitter,but who cares,Fuck 'em!
As the unlikely,and loveable, Genius that is ,team manager, Claudio Ranieri put it so succinctly:
"Dilly Ding Dilly Dong! We're in the Champions League Man! What's wrong with you?"

The Raison d'etre of this diatribe is to celebrate my birthplace's moment in the spotlight by remembering some of the missing pop groups who populated the Leicester music scene's seedy underbelly.
Better Known for annoying faux-cool fodder like Kasabian, Cornershop, Gaye Bykers On Acid,and grebo crud like Crazyhead(Nearly included a Family track, but they were Hippies weren't they?).Forget that nonsense,they are the Martin O'Neil era equivalent of Pop. What we want is the Brian Little era clumsy losers of noise. Making the sonic doppelgangers of the Leicester v Derby 1994 Play-off final, where the foxes put three centre halves in attack beating a slick and skilfull Derby team with brute force and ignorance. I can still see human donkey Gary Coatsworth's 50 yard diagonal ball, into Derby's penalty box,smeared over the goal line by a brutal Steve Walsh to score. Gary Coatsworth really was worth his body weight in coats. He never played another game.......just like many of the bands featured on this compilation.Beautiful losers with a route one musical approach that ultimately works.(I must apologise to Derby Fans for 1994,probably thee worst football Leicester ever played)

TRACK LISTING:

1/ The 1974 LEICESTER CITY SQUAD -"This is the Season For Leicester"

A very appropriate single released in 1974 in the vane hope that we went on to win our FA Cup semi-final against Shankly's Liverpool....we lost. A single literally 42 years ahead of its time!

2/ The SINATRAS - "Happy Feeling"

Peel touted post punk indie on the uber-trendy Dining Out Records from 1980. Very accurate vibe.

3/ STANDARD ISSUE - "Living in Leicester" (Live at Scamps 1980)

An autobiographical number by Atonal DIY post punk combo Standard Issue. The Charlotte crew mentioned would be the usual suspect who hung out at Leicesters premier muso-pub the Princess Charlotte.You can find the Hind (sans Crew) opposite the railway station if you are so inclined....unless its been demolished that is.

4/ DRAGON OR EMPEROR - "Your Success"

Avant-Rock collaboration from Aaron Moore(Volcano the Bear) and that bloke from Black Carrot who sounds like that bloke from Pere Ubu. Had to think twice about this as Aaron inexplicably supports West Ham????? The title says it all for the lads.

5/ FARMLIFE - "Susie's Party"

Another one from Dining Out Records by Farmlife, better known as The Bomb Party in years to come. It's the nearest tune I could get to Jamie Vardy's Party.

6/ DISCO ZOMBIES - "Top Of The Pops"

The legendary Disco Zombies are hear to remind everyone who's Top of The Football Pops, with a hefty slice of punky power pop.

7/ MC PITMAN - "Witness The Pitness"

Although officially from Coalville,which has the unfortunate affliction to be near 'The North', so has imported the yorkshire slang word 'Mi'Sen', meaning myself. Otherwise spoiling a near perfect example of the Leicester accent as presented here by Rapping Coal miner MC Pitman.

8/ YEAH YEAH NOH - "Cottage Industry"

John Peel favourites and poor man's Smiths, Yeah Yeah Noh, epitomise the cheapness of everything Leicester.

9/ METAL DOUGHNUT BAND - "Laura Norder"

Some horrific n-n-n-n-nineteen style sampling on this one.
The Maggie Thatcher sample "We will never compromise with Violence", makes this a perfect theme tune for Robert Huth (uncompromising Leiceter center-Half). The Doughnuts were a danceable version of the early to mid eighties fad for junk metal percussion, who like to perform naked......tut tut tut.

10/ DEEP FREEZE MICE - "A Ten Legged Beast (Or an eight legged beast with feelers)"

Prolific proto-indie DIY tunesmiths Deep Freeze Mice almost describe LCFC. Maybe 22 legged beast is more appropriate....or 21 legged beast as Mahrez only has one foot.

11/ MIDNIGHT CIRCUS - "Survivors"

DIY Cassette leg-ends pay tribute to last seasons great escape from almost certain relegation.

12/ BARRON BALLS - "Stoke"

Early eighties bedroom combo Barron Balls and some unhinged nonsense about Stoke, who did the foxes no favors when they shouldered arms against Spurs a few weeks ago! Twats!

13/ BARRON BALLS on WFMU radio.

......from Leechester says the DJ.Ah Bless.

Various Barron Ballers at Wembly 1992...er....we lost!

14/ MODERN LIVING - "Drink Is A Drug"

Wobbly post punk incompetence about the dangers of too much booze.

15/ THE AMBER SQUAD - "It's a Replay "

No Replays for the big four in the league i'm happy to inform them!
Power Pop from the mean streets of downtown Oakham.

16/ KEVIN HEWICK - "Plenty"

Yeah, that bloke who hung out with the Factory Records lot.Once touted as the potential Ian Curtis replacement after said singer topped himself.

17/ VOLCANO THE BEAR - "Planetary Bethlehem"

The Residents of the east mids. Dada-esque combo with members who were once in a hardcore band called 'Scalpt' with a 'T'. Artistic types, with Painter Aaron.....as in Painter and Decorator.
I suppose the KP Stadium is a kind of Bethlehem equivalent for us fans of the Filberts.

18/ THE ROCKIN' BASTARDS - "Dog Song"

The opposite end of the intellectual scale, either at the top or the bottom, depends on which way you want to see it; are The Rockin' Bastards. Upon revisiting this magnum opus, vocaliser Butch Clarke said "(it)sounds like people being murdered with angle grinders in a Victorian lunatic asylum."......I can't disagree....but murdered in a good way.......a bit like this song?

A Rockin' Bastard  Guitarist (Toffo) at Wembley 96

19/ PROLAPSE - "Every Night I'm Mentally Crucified (7000 Times)"

Featuring Leicester's only professional Scotsman.
The title is evocative of many wasted 90 minutes i've spent watching Leicester City.......it all seems so worth it now.

20/ SCOUTS OF UZBEKISTAN - "The Dilly Ding Dilly Dong Song"

Specially remixed, and unreleased track from Scouts Of Uzbekistan,in praise of Claudio, from their forthcoming ,and long awaited LP, "Hate Is Our Religion" on Year Zero Records.

21/ DJ tells us about the Scouts.

22/ THE BLIND MAN WHO WALKED PAST THE SUPERMARKET - "Keith"

Impossibly obscure weirdo's pay tribute to Leicester Legend Keith Weller when he played on a cocktail of Alcohol and 'shrooms.That must have been the game he wore the famous tights?

23/ FUTURE TOYS - "R.C.U."

Doon't no nuffink baht these Fookahs.....Future Toys....just like the footy clubs who haven't yet been taken over by foreign capitalist gangsters....y'know, The 'Sleeping Giants', like Wolves for example?

24/ NEW AGE - "Livin' For Now"

Another Dining Out band, who quickly slid down the New Romantic helter skelter to hell.
I'm Livin' for Now, because I probably won't ever see my footy club win another bean.

25/ THE BANGERS - "Blue Army Blues"

I have horrific memories of this tune echoing in my addled brain in the coach to Wembley in '94, when i had a hangover by half time.....oh the pain. A gentle reggae tinged run through the sink estates of Leicestershire, sung by some awful career Hooligan,who thankfully I don't remember the name of. Probably got knifed up shortly after this.

26/ SHOWADDYWADDY - "Blue Moon"

No Leicester compilation is complete without these celebrated chocolate box Teds. One of their sons actually played for the Foxes, Scott Oakes I believe.......New Faces had a lot to answer for, not only these anti-matter rockers, but Lenny Henry as well. These crimes easily puts the Third Reich in the shade.

Zchivago(Front Right) and Van Hellman of the Barron Balls(Front Left) with Super Steve Claridge , and unknown strangers after he shinned the winner at Wembley against Crystal Palace in 1996.

But, the only Leicester Band ever to be re-imagined as Leicester City players on an album sleeve was Family, with this charming depiction which adorned "The Best Of Family" album in about 1973

Great cover, boys,sorry you didn't make it on the Compilation. The "Weavers Answer" is a great tune anyway.
Back in the (Eyres)Monsell, where I wuz brung up.There was a couple of hippies living in a grotty council flat,one in a wheel chair and cowboy boots; wheeled around by an hippie in a cowboy hat and an eyepatch. Turned out the one in the whell chair was the one and only Ric Grech of Family,Traffic and Blind Faith! Ravaged with drink and drugs and broke,he was reduced to living in the council estate that he came from, to die. Let that be a cautionary tale to you kids who are flirting with the rock'n'roll myth. Don't do drugs and Alcohol or you'll end up in Eyres Monsell with renal failure!!!

DOWNLOAD "DILLY DING DILLY DONG" BY CLICKING THIS HANDY LINK HERE!!!!!!!!!