Anal Cunt – "I Like It When You Die" (Earache Records – MOSH 169 CD) 1997

It had to happen.....an anal Cunt CD from the age when no-one released a vinyl Lp,and no-one was 'woke'. The dark dark days of the late nineties.

Artwork(?), forget about it, lyrics(?), who cared anyway(?),tolerable surface noise,not with compact disc's maaan...scratch the fucker and its dead.However CD's were very good for that Glitch fad from the early noughties,y'know (author stifles yawn) Oval,and other boring fucking clever dicks like that.Either that or using them to make a novelty clock to win favor with a friend or potential lover.

Anal Cunt sounded like completely fucked CD's long before Wire Magazine excitedly discovered Blectum from Blechdom; and Anal Cunt were also funny without stooping to the two twats and a laptop option.This shit was done with the same instruments the Beatles used!?

The song titles,apart from being vaguely amusing, usually doubled up as the entire lyrics for the tune in question.Iambic pentameter it is most certainly NOT.

Replace the words 'Gary' and 'Numan' from the following piece of constructive criticism last seen in a 1980 copy of Sounds with 'Anal' and 'Cunt',and you may get an idea of the far-reaching influence of this potty mouthed combo:

"Gary Numan (Anal Cunt) has managed to do for music what the Chimpanzee has done for William Shakespeare" (Sounds 1980-ish).

Scanning through the titles one can't help noticing the abundance of profound descriptions of the human condition in three words or less.

It's like Putnam is talking about me!?

You've Got No Friends,You're Old (Fuck You),Ha Ha, Your Wife Left You,You Got Date Raped,are devastatingly reflective...except maybe the date rape one.

Then we have the insightful: Pottery's Gay;Your Kid Is Deformed,Recycling Is Gay, and Windchimes are definitely Gay!?

And the whole French race is adequately summed up by "Your Favorite Band Is Supertramp"

Myself being an ex-european (I'm now British),there are spurious references to colloquial celebrities,of whom I know nothing except for Richard 'President Gas' Butler,who grew up a few junctions of the M1 south away from myself.

This album and concept,on the whole is a challenging work of Art that belongs in a pretentious gallery in East London......but to Seth Putnam that would be far too gay for him.

He died of a heart attack about a decade ago,which, in reference to the album title,gains a new sense of Irony which which one should find enjoyable.Maybe even funny?

I liked it when you died Seth Putnam.......but isn't dying a bit...er...Gay?

Tracklist:

1 Jack Kevorkian Is Cool 0:40
2 Valujet 1:28
3 You've Got No Friends 1:12
4 You Keep A Diary 1:12
5 You Own A Store 0:37
6 You Got Date Raped 0:49
7 Recycling Is Gay 0:36
8 You're A Cop 1:50
9 You Can't Shut Up 0:18
10 You've Got Cancer 0:30
11 We Just Disagree 0:32
12 Hungry Hungry Hippos 0:18
13 You Are An Interior Decorator 0:51
14 Pottery's Gay 0:39
15 Rich Goyette Is Gay 0:53
16 Branscombe Richmond 1:35
17 You Live In Allston 0:53
18 You Are A Food Critic 0:54
19 Just The Two Of Us 0:27
20 Your Band's In The Cut-Out Bin 1:10
21 You're Gay 0:37
22 You Look Adopted 1:17
23 Your Cousin Is George Lynch 0:10
24 You Have Goals 0:22
25 You Drive An Iroc 0:55
26 You Play On A Softball Team 0:57
27 Because You're Old 0:45
28 You Sell Cologne 0:30
29 Being A Cobbler Is Dumb 0:27
30 You Live In A Houseboat 0:45
31 Richard Butler 1:32
32 311 Sucks 0:39
33 Your Kid Is Deformed 0:40
34 You Are An Orphan 1:05
35 You're Old (Fuck You) 0:12
36 You Go To Art School 0:55
37 Your Best Friend Is You 0:53
38 You're In A Coma 1:18
39 Windchimes Are Gay 0:10
40 No,We Don't Want To Do A Split Seven Inch With Your Stupid Fucking Band 0:28
41 René Auberjonois 0:40
42 The Internet Is Gay 0:25
43 Ha Ha, Your Wife Left You 1:11
44 Hootie And The Blowfish 0:38
45 You Went To See Dishwalla And Everclear (You're Gay) 0:22
46 Locking Drop Dead In McDonalds 0:20
47 Technology's Gay 0:25
48 Your Favorite Band Is Supertramp 0:37
49 I'm In A.C. 0:20
50 You (Fill In The Blank) 0:26
51 Kyle From Incantation Has A Mustache 4:10
52 Bonus Track #3 0:09

DOWNLOADING is gay but do it anyway HERE!

John Shuttleworth – "The Yamaha Years" (Chic Ken – Chic Ken CD001) 1997

 Nooooo!...John Shuttleworth ,like the Tooth Beaver, is not real. He is the comedic creation of the artist formerly known as Jilted John,also known as Graham Fellows,the actor who played Gail Tilsley's teenage lover in Coronation street......her husband, Brian,played by one of the finest actors that ever haunted the cathode ray tube(i Jest of Course) Chris Quentin, would have said something like "I'll Flamin' Kill Him!" when he inevitably found out. Poor Brian got knifed in 1989,he was stabbed at 8pm in the Monday episode,but the ambulance didn't turn up till 7.30 Wednesday evening for the next installment......I'm sure John Shuttleworth, second wife Mary,and kids, Darren and Karen, would have been watching those fateful nights in UK Soap Opera history.

Coronation Street is built on foundations of northern camp humour,and in contrast to its more serious soap rival, was famed for having actors who wished they were comedians,whereas East Enders,the London one, had Comedians who wished they were actors.

In the case of John Shuttleworth, he was very much a case of an Actor who became a comedian,via music,and his most enduring character still is the Redundant Steelworker from Sheffield who reinvented himself as a singer songwriter,and his fabulous Yamaha keyboard.

His tunes are hilarious of course,and here we have a collection of his finest efforts to date,and Yes....it does include "Pigeons In Flight.

Tracklist:

1 My Wife Died In 1970
2 Modern Man
3 Have You Seen My Wife?
4 You're Like Manchester
5 Eggs And Gammon
6 Man Who Lives On The M62
7 Up And Down Like A Bride's Nightie
8 The Christmas Orphan
9 Y Reg
10 500 Bus Stops
11 Save The Whale
12 The Bee And The Wasp
13 Can You Ken Ken?
14 Shopkeepers In The North
15 Mary Had A Little Lamb
16 How To Be Happy In A Sad Sad World
17 From A Father To A Son (The Burial Song)
18 What's A Shuttleworth?
19 Do The Stars Remember?
20 Pigeons In Flight

DOWNLOAD a fine argument for redundancy HERE!

Ground Zero – "Plays Standards" (Nani Records – NCD-201) 1997

There was something about the Nineties that were distasteful in the upmost. Digital recording and the CD's themselves were primarily culpable. The silence of the silences were disconcerting,as was the fact that if you scratched a CD it was fucked instead of just making a click like vinyl did. Also because of the longer running time, the advent of the 80 minute track infiltrated the avant-garde, with albums that never seemed to fucking end. Then we had 'Sampling'......oh gawwd.....from bedroom dwellers with impeccable record collections,and even worse, impeccable taste!

Tony Wilson once said that the kids in Manchester had the best record collections....wrong.....The Japanese did,and its all here on Ground Zero's "Plays Standards CD", which at least keeps the duration down to a manageable 70 minutes.

I hated all this pop music culture in a perfectly recorded raspberry smoothie thang at the time, where the DJ became the centre of attention simply because he had a bunch of jazz records under his arm, and a fucking AKAI sampler in his bedroom.....as we all did in 1997.

Admittedly, the art of scratching or Turntablism can be quite impressive,and in the hands of the correct person, a creative tool. Otomo Yoshihidi could be said to be one of them? Mostly DJ's wanted to thought of as musicians(they aren't!),but here's one very accomplished musician who seemed to want to be a DJ!? 

No-one's ever happy at doing what they're good at are they? 

Although very guilty of the 80 minute long album track when 40 minutes is the limit of an average human attention span, Otomo was the world champ at eclecticism. Everything including several Kitchen sinks were thrown into his digital collages, and all done, with, obviously, thee most impeccable, "taste?";.......like an avant-garde Kenny Everett as the Cupid Stunt of post club art gallery aural aestheticism .

But, alas, as I'm now now also an aging Stunt, i kinda like this stuff in a nostalgic kinda way.....there are, however,some splendid moments of Free improvisation on this rather entertaining album.....and it is, ALL, done in the best possible taste.....YUK!

Those definitely weren't the days, but no-ones doing it nowadays,so it don't give one an 'eadache no more.

The sad thing is I ripped and sold all my vinyl in 2001/2 (see cupid stunt again?) to finance a house purchase.The funniest bit is that now i'm buying it all back with my new trendy turntables....yep plural.

So,I'd better buy my AKAI sampler back too i suppose?

 

Tracklist:

1.El Derecho De Vivir En Paz + Shinoshin 3/4
2.Ultra Q
3.Those Were The Days
4.Folhas Secas
5.Washington Post March + Japan Dissolution
6.Akashai No Ame Ga Yamu Toki
7.Bones
8.Where Is The Police? + The Bath Of Surprise
9.Miagetegoran, Yoru No Hoshi Wo
10.Yume No Hansyu
11.Die Pappel Vom Karlplatz
12.A Better Tomorrow + I Say A Little Prayer (Roland Kirk Version)

DOWNLOAD in the standard way HERE!

Smell & Quim ‎– "Eat Pussy" (Kadef C-20 -Kadef07) 1997

The natural length for a pop album is forty minutes,and I think that 20 minutes is the natural length for Smell & Quim style noise.This is on the softer more palatable end of the noise spectrum,where space is left for some subtlety to stave off the boredom.It's more of an old skool industrial outing for our favourite purile pranksters from oop north,or dahn sarf if you live north of Yorkshire,

My father(from north of Yorkshire) used to gather us children around the fireplace of a winters evening during the power cuts of 1971.....no telly was there?..... to tell us about the time he ate some Pussy. We were transfixed as he described how in desperation, him and emasciated buddies, found, killed and ate a Cat when on the death march in Poland during WW2. It tasted like Chicken he said. "Are you sure it wasn't a chicken?" I inquired in hope,only to find out he ate a Dog too,and some rats! It begs the question as to what would have Vegans done on the death march? Eat Grass and mud?

As my father had been on strike for three months from the Post Office,we kids were wondering whether we would have to eat pussy too, as we were totally fucking skint,and the eventual pay rise won would never make up for the lost wages! If you think things are fucked now, you should have experienced Great Britain during the seventies.That makes Brexit,and co-vid look like a damn fine time that was had by all. These conditions, combined with Yes's "Tales of Topographic Oceans" have been blamed for the emergence of Punk Rock.So what are our brainwashed kids gonna do in reponse to the Co-Vid crisis?

The answer is , Fuck All,'cept warble about how their boyfriend has chucked them and get out the autotuner AGAIN!

Tracklist:

A Untitled 10:13
B Untitled 10:05

DOWN(LOAD)some Pussy HERE!

Ivor Cutler - "Peel Sessions 1987-1997" (a DIE or DIY? Compilation)

As Doctor McBrazil-Nuts said to Missus Big Buttons, "take your clothes off and lay on the trolley, then take my temperature!...What does the thermometer say?"
"Made In Venice" says Missus Big-Buttons.
"Receptionist is there anyone else in the waiting room?
"Just Mister Big-Buttons" replied the Receptionist.
If that doesn't contain all you need to know about the Coronavirus #19 crisis then there's a cure for coronavirus HCoV-229E, aka the common cold......for which, after centuries of trying,is still incurable.So the likelihood of a vaccine appearing like magic early next year is pretty un-likely, I'm sure you'd agree.
Very few literary works make complete sense of the world like the work,if you call it work, of Ivor Cutler. Philosophers like Nietzsche thought themselves into blind corners and early graves to work out what the fuck is going on,and still found no answer. Cutler manages this in one short couplet.....there is no sense to existence,and like the abrupt endings to many of his poems, there is only silence. But at least we can laugh at it all while we still can.It's only as bleak as you make it,nothing you do is gonna change anything. Get reday for living with the Virus, like humanity has done for millenia. For want of a better phrase that isn't emblazened on every mug on the planet; "Keep Calm and Carry On".....for fucks sake!? "Language is a Virus",said the American version of Ivor Cutler, William S. Burroughs.

Tracklist:

1. A Romantic Man 09/06/1987
2. The Shapely Balloon 09/06/1987
3. The Clever Night Doctor 09/06/1987
4. The Aggressive Onion Vendor 09/06/1987
5. Me And My Kid Brother 09/06/1987
6. The Perambulating Scottish Colander 09/06/1987
7. A Wag At The Flicks 09/06/1987
8. Glasgow Dreamer ep 11 (Andy Kershaw 21/05/87)
9. Glasgow Dreamer: Episode 8 09/05/1991
10.Beside the Fish 09/05/1991
11.Footsteps 09/05/1991
12.Green Light 09/05/1991
13.The 2 Coy Hinnies 09/05/1991
14.Seaweed 09/05/1991
15.Insect 09/05/1991
16.Glasgow Dreamer: Episode 6 09/05/1991
17.Biltong Croon 09/05/1991
18.A Long Hard Gland 09/05/1991
19.Hee Haw 09/05/1991
20.Doing The Bathroom (Episode 1) 25/11/1992
21.The Lid 25/11/1992
22.25,000 Miles 25/11/1992
23.Part Of The Ground 25/11/1992
24.Between Two Walls 25/11/1992
25.Your Side 25/11/1992
26.Pschawa 25/11/1992
27.Ros Vulgaris 25/11/1992
28.A Dale Song 25/11/1992
29.Two Paracetamol 25/11/1992
30.Doing The Bathroom (Episode 2) 25/11/1992
31.What Have You Got? (1997)
32.Ruby (1997)
33.Open Your Arms (1997)
34.Jam (1997)
35.Ingredients (1997)

DOWNLOAD because ivor got no more HERE!

John Fahey ‎– "City Of Refuge" (Tim/Kerr Records ‎– 644 830 127-2) 1997

No, I don't mind all that plinky-plonky finger pickin' folk nonsense if its mixed up with some noise and dark ambient fuzz.In fact, this is how all that american primitive stuff should sound.Gimmie the tapes of "Blind Joe Death" and lemme remix it......in fact you don't need the tapes as there ain't no rubbish to back up the solo guitaring......I might give that a go during my autumn years.It would sound not unlike this album,but maybe a bit more harsh noise floating to the surface every five minutes or so.
So the 'Godfather of New Age" ,as some deaf person labelled him once upon a time, muat have scanned The Wire magazine after he was re-discovered by some desperate music journalista.For Around '95, 'The Glitch', was heavily lauded by those in the 'Know', so maybe John was just giving the kids what he thought they wanted? Trouble was,those who read the Wire were not young, and were primarily White,White Collar music bores,who slip on some Albert Ayler in the background whenever the phone rings. Or pretentious arty-wannbe cunts like me.Luckily as I dragged myself up from the gutter of council estate thatcherite Britain, I would never be accepted in either group. This 'Freedom' gives me the perspective needed to actually appreciate this fine record in its true light.
And as for the Godfather of New Age, he sums up his feelings nicely in the title and music of Track 7.
.....we'll forgive him for sampling Stereolab, who are firmly entrenched in the 'pretentious arty-wannbe cunt' category. 

Tracklist:

1 Fanfare 5:17
2 The Mill Pond 3:51
3 Chelsey Silver, Please Come Home 4:31
4 City Of Refuge I 20:37
5 City Of Refuge III 6:30
6 Hope Slumbers Eternal 5:04
7 On The Death And Disembowelment Of The New Age 19:27

DOWNLOAD and disembowel the new age HERE!

John Fahey ‎– "Womblife" (Table Of The Elements ‎– 37 Rb) 1997

You have to give him his due respect, John Fahey carried on regardless despite what opinionated gobshites like me say.
This fan-losing experimental late-life comeback album from the nineties,when the man was a name-droppers dream.
"Have you heard the latest Fahey album......NO!??......it's fantastic; but then again i've been a fan since the early eighties,.....wot????..... you've never heard of him?.....oh dear,you don't know what you've missed"....!
Well,we do know what we've missed thanks,and most of it we wish we had.....rather harsh,but the object of todays scything attack are Record Snobs,especially ones who get their tastes from tasty muso-zines like "The Wire", who, in the mid-nineties, were busy championing John Fahey.By 1997,i had binned off my subscription to this magazine, with its endless articles on the "Glitch" and members of Tortoise talking about really early jungle as a influence.
It was the start of music journalism becoming nothing more than a portal for uncritical star worship,no matter how underground or unstar-like were its victims.John Fahey was one of these poor unfortuate artistes whose canon were unduly elevated to godlike status,and now the public wanted MORE!?
To artists with a realistic world view,this can be a distasteful end to a long ignored career.Now you can put out any old crap and your new trendy fanbase will laud it.
So, Fahey scores plenty brownie points avec moi as he alienates his original fanbase with this distinctly un-folky ambient jandekian guitar driven erazerhead soundtrack experiment,that would also confuse his new 90's fanbase......neither of which included this gobshite, but I am a fan of John as the pain in the arse person I suspect he was.John 'the man'.
Its up there with "Metal Machine Music", OMD's "Dazzle Ships",Scott Walker's "Tilt" and PiL's first and third album's, as one of the best fanbase fuckers ever made?

Tracklist:

1 Sharks 9:20
2 Planaria 9:54
3 Eels 6:13
4 Coelacanths 7:28
5 Juana 12:34

DOWNLOAD or abort HERE!

Derek Bailey, Keiji Haino ‎– "寄り添い合いし 秩序と無秩序の気配かな = Drawing Close, Attuning - The Respective Signs Of Order And Chaos" Tokuma Japan Communications ‎– TKCF-77017) 1997

No, this isn't two chimps playing deulling banjo's on guitar!
Its Keiji Haino in yer left ear and Derek Bailey in yer right ear,or the otherway round depending on which direction you placed yer earphones.
Derek Bailey,as you know,was thee pioneer of the free jazz guitar, and Keiji Haino was....well.....Keiji Haino!? They both wear glasses,one of them perscription, the other off the rack shades that seem permanently sellotaped to his head.
Both have a tendancy to flesh out Chaos Theory on the six strings of a guitar,but without conventional chords,notes, or technique.
This was their first collaboration, or abberation, depending on your point of view,and I personally find it inferior to their second, called,ironically,"Songs", which you can find HERE!
I dunno, maybe this really is actually two chimps, and we've read too much into it,which is basically an artistic statement within itself?

Tracklist:

1 Untitled 1:19
2 Untitled 2:15
3 Untitled 1:47
4 Untitled 3:58
5 Untitled 9:40
6 Untitled 26:01
7 Untitled 30:28

DOWNLOAD some order from the chaos HERE!

Loren Mazzacane Connors, Jean-Marc Montera, Thurston Moore, Lee Ranaldo ‎– "MMMR" (Xeric ‎– x 99.5) 1997

Although the sight of the names of the two most prolific Sonic Yoof Bores emblazened across the cover would put anyone off this record, it's actually one of the better Mazzacane Connors collaborations.
The MMR vaccine scandal, in which one doctor said it gives your kids Autism, therfore no-one on the entire planet vaccinates their kids against anything anymore,has nothing to do with this record.But if you play it long enough to any 'Anti-Vaxxers', while forcing them to watch clear evidence that MMR has fuck all to do with Autism, it could well,potentially, save 1000's of kids lives every year. So this album is potentially an anti-MMR aural vaccine......lets call it the 'MMMR' vaccine.
Loren Mazzacane is probably over powered by the 'experimental tuning twins' Renaldo and Moore, so it's mo(o)re their album than his. Whereas Mazzacane's solo work is more Novacaine than Mazzacane, here we are treated to much scrapping and banging, and doubtless, the two eternal teenagers with record collections on the album, would have whipped out their drumsticks to abuse their wildly customised guitar collection,and show off to their avant garde chums.
The first track is the more tunful, and mannered of the three,and is ,by coincidence(not),the track where the Sonic Yoofs are strangely abscent!
I'm only jealous.....its a great record, and I love Sonic Youth really........I think!?
Lets ask John Fahey,Grammy award winner, guitarist, avant-folk legend from beyond the grave, what he thinks eh?

"This is great improvised music. It is beautiful and complex and, most importantly, it breathes. As good and as moving as anything you'll hear this year."
John Fahey
Tracklist:

A1 Mazzacane Connors / Montera 11:11
A2 Mazzacane Connors / Montera / Moore 10:07
B  Mazzacane Connors / Montera / Moore / Ranaldo 20:35

DOWNLOAD and vaccinate HERE!

Dogliveroil ‎– "Tamagotchi Nappy* Rash" (Vigilant ‎– VIGILMC002) 1997

When one veers over towards nineties style harsh noise cassettes,it begins to sound a lot like Groundhog Day. Which is appropriate because,this being 'Groundhog Day'(wot?) I just watched.....open-mouthed I may add......a live news feed of the 'Groundhog Day' ceremony in some white only backwards backwater called 'Punxsutawny, in Pennslyvania. It seems that a bunch of members of the fucking illuminati, decked out in creepy victorian outfits, ask a Groundhog called 'Phil', what the weathers gonna be like in the coming year!? You couldn't make this shit up!? No wonder Trump* got voted in, he seems normal compared to these , male only, relics from some obscene secret society.Trump and Putin are highly likely to be members.
So, as to avoid a Groundhog Day version of Harsh Noise, I've gone for a more articulate, nuanced Noise, from 'Dogliveroil' based in the grim hole that is Stoke-On-Trent. Possibly the Punxsutawny of the black country in ye olde england.The place that gave the world Discharge and D-Beat, if not an actual bodily discharge of the puss variety, or Vomit at the thought that actual intelligent lifeforms live there!....I say intelligent, but this place did also give us Robbie Williams, which is a crime that deserves the place to be wiped from the face of the Earth and turned into a country park.
Rather than Phil the Groundhog Dogliveroil has a another Phill,as in Phil Todd, of the 'Betly Welcomes careful Drivers'label and 'Ashtray Navigations', as an integral member.
The noise ,thankfully, is not a constant barrage of unplugged TV white noise, but has space in between the grinds, scrapes, and frying circuitry.This lends quality to the horrible sounds dribbled hence.
So, this Phil (Todd), is predicting a very noisy February, and a throughly miserable coming year.
On a more Positive note, Phil the Groundhog has predicted a 'Beautiful Spring'????.....he did also say that The Beatles 'Rock!', so this prediction is currently under intense scrutiny.

*Note for Americans who accidently were brought here by googling 'Groundhog Day':

1/ A Nappy is a Diaper
2/ A Bog-Seat is a toilet seat.
3/ Trump is your president!!!!????
4/ Trump is also an anglicism for 'Fart'

Tracklisting:

A Mounting The Bog-Seat* To Oblivion 17:58
B Bucket Without A Shadow 18:46

DOWNLOAD again and again HERE!

Birchville Cat Motel ‎– "Birchville Cat Motel": (Celebrate Psi Phenomenon ‎– #9) 1997

I don't post much on here from the nineties, but The Birchville Cat Motel is an exception.Especially for his prolific DIY-ness, and the fact that he fits in nicely to conclude our brief visit to the shores of New Zealand.
Campbell Kneale, aka BCM, started churning out his special brand of ambient drone noise based post-industrial soundscapes in '97, on the then futurist medium of CD-r...early versions of which are highly likely to have self-destructed by now. He has hundreds of releases strecthed over the last 20 years,but this was the first, to my knowledge anyway.Its a kind of mellow version of Merzbow, and therefore infinitly more listenable.

Tracklist:

1 Cast Iron Teether 8:07
2 So Sad Doll 10:52
3 Rimrider 11:54
4 Allandale Triple Culvert 10:36
5 Twelve Roses High 14:44
6 Transparent Soul Fragment 6:54

DOWNLOAD a reservation HERE!

Jandek ‎– "I Woke Up" (Corwood Industries ‎– Corwood 0764) 1997

It's the conspiracy theory that is 'Jandek Monday' again.
I used to like a nice conspiracy Theory but now "I Woke Up".
Of course, "Wake Up" is a favourite phrase of those suffering with the latest God replacement therapy  of Global Conspiracy Theories ,which has many sects....such as...... Chem Trails, Anti-Vacc, the approach of Planet X/Niburu, Flat earthers, 9/11 Troothers, alien abductees,......the list goes on.
Like the inmates of organised Religions, they have an inpenetrable talent for dismissing facts and evidence  harmful to their delusions as Lies from the secret government, and that anyone who believes the 'Official' line is either brainwashed or a government 'Shill'....whatever a 'Shill' is?
Its a special kind of madness to which Jandek is the perfect soundtrack for. All are products of the modern information age, where nothing can be truly believable,except that which cannot be disproved, Jesus-style......even when faced with overwhelming evidence to the contrary, they can argue that the evidence isn't in itself proveable, which is correct.Nothing based on imagination and superstition can be disproven,or proven 100%. The best I can do on the existence of Planet Niburu is say that according to current scientific evidence Planet Niburu almost certainly is not coming towards the earth and so far there is little evidence that such a planet exists in our solar system.
The Flat-Earthers are the best ones for this. The simple mountains of evidence that the Earth is spherical,is literally undeniable......but they still deny it. Its all a cover-up isn't it? And we need to "WAKE UP"! Well I woke up anyway, and have no need to fill the empty void inside myself with either a God or silly theories about how we're being controlled.......of course we're being controlled, there's no news there,it just depends on how to cope with this fact......and it ain't nothing to do with Planet Fucking Niburu either!!!!!We do it it to ourselves.
Maybe a Jandek LP can get them to "WAKE UP" but its doubtful?
Anyway, this record will either wake you up with its startling anti-musicality, or send you deeper to sleep with Jandek's moaning croons about hopelessness and loneliness.

Tracklist:

1 First Awake Moment 2:26
2 Alone On That Mountain 3:53
3 I Can Not 4:03
4 Get Back Inside 3:00
5 Long Long 3:47
6 Joab 2:40
7 Equaled In Life 2:16
8 Star Of Zenith 3:55
9 Take It Easy 2:09
10 Just Die 3:53
11 Pending Doom 1:15
12 Sleepless Night 2:22
13 Today 1:26

DOWNLOAD and wake up HERE!

Jad And Nao ‎– "Half Alien" (Sakura wrechords ‎– C-08) 1997

Two living legends of DIY outsider otherness, Jad Fair of Half Japanese and Naofumi Ishimura of Yximalloo , got together to make a triptych of albums in the nineties and noughties.
Picasso said, and i've quoted him before in these unhallowed pages:
"It took me four years to paint like Raphael,but a lifetime to paint like a child."
Now these two 'Artists',and they ARE indeed 'Artists', had one up on Picasso,and missed out the Raphael part.While dreary unit shifters like Marc Knopfler spend a lifetime trying to play like the musical equivalent of Raphael,whoever that could be(?).Jad and Nao came out of the womb already painting and playing like a child,but had the good sense to stick with it for a whole lifetime.
This, the second of a series of three (so far?),has more of a hint of Jad Fairs work rather than Nao's;but thats mainly due to Jad's singing spread all over the 40 tracks,not to mention his reasonably proficient drumming.I could in fact prefer this collaboration to either one's nineties solo work.

Tracklist:

1 Absolute Pure
2 Blue Horizon
3 It's Mot Fair
4 A Real Mix Up
5 Do You Know A Secret?
6 The Crown Of Love
7 Snakes
8 Star Trick
9 Demon Monster
10 Her Hair Was Red
11 Hawaii
12 Is It A Great People?
13 Muslc
14 Sea And Sand
15 Mickey Mouse
16 T.V. Monster
17 Cupid
18 Fortune Teller
19 Ice Cream
20 Jimmy
21 Big Money
22 Bunny When Hop
23 Gentleness
24 Television
25 So It Is Written
26 Pancake Box
27 Valentine
28 Half Robot
29 Roll Over Beethoven
30 Attchi Muite Hoy
31 Monkey In Tree
32 Candy Land
33 Pretty Princess
34 Cowboy's Life
35 Bread And Butter
36 All You Gotta Do
37 Big Fat Monkey
38 Radio City
39 Only One You
40 Tonight

DOWNLOAD two halves of the whole HERE!

Rudimentary Peni ‎– "Echoes Of Anguish" (Outer Himalayan Records ‎– BOOBOO6) 1997

Rudi P goes metal......but it's good metal. Simple riffs, no boring solo's, short tunes, and intelligent lyrics......but it' ain't no 'Death Church'.
Mark E. Smith once said that Punk Rock was just 'badly played Heavy Metal'; well this version of Punk Rock is well played Heavy Metal, that doesn't sacrifice intelligence for power, both of which it has in spades.

Tracklist:
A1 The Flame Of Insanity
A2 In Memory Of Pain
A3 Dissolution
A4 Only Death
A5 Womb So Scorned
A6 Time Passing
B1 Echo
B2 Voice
B3 Stone
B4 Trial By Separation
B5 From The Heart
B6 Your Secret Life

DOWNLOAD echoes of once great group HERE!

Bodycocktail - "Didn’t The World Ask For This By Name?" (ZH27/Bodycocktail#45) 1997

No, the world didn't ask for this by name, in fact no-one did,but maybe they will in the future,or on another world.Although the search for intelligent life in other parts of the universe isn't going too well at the moment,and it really could be a possibility that all the factors needed at one time for Life to evolve into an intelligent species are far rarer than we first imagined.Then they have to survive themselves,which is undoubtedly even rarer,given that Nature rewards the most violently ruthless with genetic domination. The search for Intelligent life on Earth is also continuing unabated ,and is looking even more fruitless.One of the biggest hopes lies in the works of Bodycocktail.
This one has a promising ghostly organist in some ruined church,playing a looping mantra against a droning GM synth module on  Tambura setting.Then come the terrible GM Tablas,which disappear for Zan's eighties style, gothic crooning, swimming clumsily among the swirling ambient waters;only for the Tabla's to return for the outro about 15 minutes later.File under 'Other'.

Track:

1 - "Didn't the world ask for this by name?"

DOWNLOAD this cassette by name HERE!

Bodycocktail - "Toss Me In The Air,I'll Pay!" (ZH27 - Bodycocktail #44) 1997

Bodycocktail's pop odyssey continues with tape number 44 of 177, and counting,albums. Like most of Zan Hoffman's projects, an album consists of one long track on a single side of a C60,and this is no exception.
A horrible 90's synth hammers out a disjointed riff for the first seven minutes, while Zan gives an accurate impression of Stan Ridgeway (that bloke from Wall of Voodoo) in a padded cell at the funny farm. The track devolves from there, into a chaotic mash up of Pop melody and heavily effected noise(provided by Minoy).
One can imagine a Throng (or whatever the collective noun is?) of Pop consumers, hearing this and getting angry,unreasonably fuming! Maybe then they'll understand how it feels for lovers of non-product art to have the rapist manifesto's of Robin Thicke ,or the paedo propaganda of Miley Cyrus inflicted upon them!?
 

Track:

1 "Toss Me in The Air, I'll Pay!" (30:38)

DOWNLOAD then toss yourself in the air HERE!

Thee Outside - "Deaf Disco" (Year Zero Records YEAR002) 1997/2010

Did someone say Drum'n'Bass? This gives me the opportunity to plug this D'n'B ignored underground classic from 1997; re-released in 2010 on Year Zero records.Bizarre dark Drum'n'Bass stylings with a splash of Black Humour. Still sounds remarkably fresh, maybe because it isn't yer bog standard Drum'n'Bass format. Fused with Electronica,with a dash of Exotica,found sounds,noise samples, crossed with a drop of only the best in Elevator Muzak.You could even dance to this if you were so inclined and on drugs.Probably the most commercial record on Year Zero! Think Luke Vibert, Aphex Twin , Squarepusher and U-Ziq as musical references.

(This is now the fully restored and remastered version as of 08/10/2020) 

Tracklisting:

1. Testcard (3:24)
2. Sectioned (4:58)
3. Empty Mind (5:48)
4. Intruder (5:33)
5. Instructions From God (6:33)
6. Its After The End Of The World (8:55)
7. The Grey Room (The Deaf Disco) (3:11)
8. Towers Open Fire! (14:36)
9. This is Your Saviour Calling (7:28)
10.In the Beginning (5:28)
11.Wormhole (3:53)
12.A Short Song About Death (9:54)  

DOWNLOAD a piece of thee outside HERE!

Sutcliffe Jügend - "We Spit On Their Graves" (Come Organisation 1982 / Cold Spring – CSR18CD ) 1997

So Whitehouse is unlistenable morally bankrupt shit music is it? If that's your belief then this should make you even more livid.
Containing one Kevin Tomkins , sometime collaborator with Whitehouse, the charmingly monikered Sutcliffe Jügend, made this sonic misinterpretation of Danté's Inferno in 1982.This disc consists of recordings from the 10 hour cassette box set originally released on the Come Organisation label in 1982, and remastered in the Spring of 1997. A nasty, god awful racket, of distorted oscillators, screaming, and skin peeling squealing, that would make even the most open minded muso gag.
Insulting  smug musicians is a noble cause, no matter how tasteless the subject matter is.
Although, why anyone would want to idolise, albeit in a self-challenging listener baiting way such as this, anyone who looked like Oddbod senior(p.Sutcliffe) from Carry on Screaming, I'll never understand.

Peter Sutcliffe

Oddbod

There were a few classier assassins out there to choose,if there was ever such a thing.
Even in the name of "art" one has to respect the feelings of those who might be involved in the subject matter.
Of course what the creator of these atrocities to music want us to do is Spit on the graves of the Peter Sutcliffe inside all of us.......if that isn't their aim then I spit on their own sad little adolescent graves, and that of the bearded comedy monster P.Sutcliffe.
And just in case someone points it out ,yes Jügend alludes to the 'youth' bit of the Hitler Youth.If you want subtlety, musically this isn't the record for you , but perhaps the message behind the madness is? Cue comments by people who know better..........

Track Listing:

1 Ripper Victims I
2 Ripper Victims II
3 Ripper Victims III
4 Ripper Victims IV
5 Ripper Victims V
6 Ripper Victims VI
7 Ripper Victims VII
8 Ripper Victims VIII
9 Ripper Victims IX
10 Ripper Victims X
11 Ripper Victims XI
12 Ripper Victims XII
13 Ripper Victims XIII
14 Tortures I
15 Tortures II
16 Tortures III
17 Tortures IV
18 Tortures V
19 Tortures VI
20 Tortures VII
21 Necro-Sadism
22 Whores' Endlosung
23 Menta
24 Human Disregard
25 Sex Beast
26 Hammer Death (Ripper Attack)

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The Conet Project - Recordings of Shortwave Numbers Stations (Irdial Discs 1997)

SPY DIY!
Accidently, during the cold war, spys made the weirdest music ever! Sounding like the fuzziest lo-fi electronic musique concrete this side of the berlin wall.
A short synopsis of what is contained on the four discs of this collection,is basically,the coded transmissions from various intelligence operatives from allover the world,which usually consist of repeated phrases,spoken number sequences,and looped passages of classical music.They used shortwave frquencies because they could be received using a normal transistor radio,and not attract suspicion.....spooky.
From the booklet : "For more than 30 years shortwave radio has been used by intelligence agencies to transmit secret messages, by hundreds of 'numbers stations'. They (and by inference, spies) are as busy as ever. Why is it that in over 30 years, the phenomenon has gone almost totally unreported? Why are the eastern European stations still on the air? How is it that they are allowed to interfere with services like air traffic control and shipping?"
The project's name comes from a mishearing of the Czech word konec, or "end," which marks the end of transmissions on the Czech numbers station.

A favourite instrument of the early DIY scene was always the shortwave radio, as it was quite easy to tune into something weird; little did we know we were listening to spy transmissions from some unscrupulous czech agent somewhere shadowy. This,along with W.S.Burroughs' tape experiments,was obviously the main influence for Cabaret Voltaire's basic sound.
Download and prepare for an erie and etherial experience.Basically this is fucking WEIRD!

Disc One:
CD1-01 (G2A) The Swedish Rhapsody
CD1-02 (G5) Counting
CD1-03 (E14) Counting ‘Control’
CD1-04 (E10) Phonetic Alphabet - NATO
CD1-05 (G13) 5 Dashes
CD1-06 (E3) The Lincolnshire Poacher
CD1-07 (G3) Gong Station / Chimes
CD1-08 (G14) DFD 21
CD1-09 (E1) Ready Ready (15728)
CD1-10 (S2B) Bugle
CD1-11 (S10) 5 Note Version ‘Czech Lady’
CD1-12 (G4) Three Note Oddity
CD1-13 (V13) New Star Broadcasting
CD1-14 (V5A) Counting Station (Spanish)
CD1-15 (E17) English Lady / 00000 Ending
CD1-16 (V2) Attencion / 3 Finals
CD1-17 (G8) 4 Note Rising Scale
CD1-18 (V1) Ciocîrlia
CD1-19 (S10) Czech Lady
CD1-20 (G16) 2 Letter ‘YS’
CD1-21 (G16) 2 Letter ‘EL’
CD1-22 (G13) 5 Dashes
CD1-23 (E16) 2 Letter ‘RK’

Disc Two:
CD2-01 (V12) NNN
CD2-02 (G11) ‘Strich’
CD2-03 (G14) DFD21 / DFC37
CD2-04 (S2) Drums & Trumpets
CD2-05 (E12) NNN
CD2-06 (E17) English Lady - 00000 Ending
CD2-07 (G12) NNN
CD2-08 (S6) The Russian Man (‘D-va’ Northern Russian Voice)
CD2-09 (E10A) Phonetic Alphabet - NATO
CD2-10 (V6) Spanish Lady
CD2-11 (E11) ‘Strich’
CD2-12 (G16) 2 Letter ‘NU’
CD2-13 (G11) ‘Strich’
CD2-14 (S8) YT
CD2-15 (E13) 5 Dashes
CD2-16 (G19) German Man
CD2-17 (E6) English Man
CD2-18 (S7/G7) English Man + German Lady
CD2-19 (G6) German Lady
CD2-20 (V) Chinese Numbers
CD2-21 (V6) Spanish Lady
CD2-22 (E16) 2 Letter ‘MD’
CD2-23 (E6) English Man
CD2-24 (G6) German Lady
CD2-25 (E10A) Phonetic Alphabet - NATO
CD2-26 (E10) Phonetic Alphabet - NATO
CD2-27 (E15) Nancy Adam Susan
CD2-28 (E14) Counting ‘Control’
CD2-29 (E15) Nancy Adam Susan (Male Voice)
CD2-30 (E4) Cherry Ripe
CD2-31 (S21) Russian Lady
CD2-32 (S6) Russian Man
CD2-33 (E12) NNN
CD2-34 (E15) Frank Young Peter
CD2-35 (S12) Cherta
CD2-36 (S14) Russian Counting Man
CD2-37 (S16) OLX
CD2-38 (X6) 6 Tones
CD2-39 (XPH) High Pitch Polytone
CD2-40 (XPH) High Pitch Polytone
CD2-41 (XPH) High Pitch Polytone
CD2-42 (XPH) High Pitch Polytone
CD2-43 (V9) Oriental Language

Disc Three:
D3-01 (E1) Ready Ready
CD3-02 (E3) Iran / Iraq Jamming Efficacy Testing
CD3-03 (E5) English Lady
CD3-04 (E5) English Lady
CD3-05 (E6) English Man Version 1
CD3-06 (E6) English Man Version 3
CD3-07 (E6) English Man
CD3-08 (E9) Magnetic Fields
CD3-09 (E9) Magnetic Fields
CD3-10 (E11) Oblique
CD3-11 (E12) NNN
CD3-12 (E13) 5 Dashes
CD3-13 (E16) 2 Letter ‘KG’
CD3-14 (E21A) 4 Figure Counting (10 Rough Tones)
CD3-15 (E17A) 2 Voices In One Transmission
CD3-16 (G1) Tyrolean Music Station
CD3-17 (G4) 3 Note I.S.
CD3-18 (G5) 10 Rough Tones
CD3-19 (G7) Achtung!
CD3-20 (G8) ‘A’
CD3-21 (G8) Voice Sample (1-10)
CD3-22 (G8B) Rapid Dots
CD3-23 (G11) Strich
CD3-24 (G14) Hier Ist DFC Sieben Und Dreizig
CD3-25 (G15) 2 Letter ‘PN’
CD3-26 (G16) Sample Count
CD3-27 (G16) 2 Letter ‘VO’
CD3-28 (G16) 2 Letter ‘HK’
CD3-29 (G16) 2 Letter ‘DM’
CD3-30 (G18) 8 Note Rising Scale
CD3-31 (G20) Spruchnummer 1
CD3-32 (G20) Spruchnummer 4
CD3-33 (G21) Random Pop
CD3-34 (G22) Nomer 101
CD3-35 (S3) Okno Okno Okno
CD3-36 (S4) Nomer 198
CD3-37 (S5) 723 Papaqui
CD3-38 (S6) 298
CD3-39 (S6) 815
CD3-40 (S6E) 167
CD3-41 (S7C) Moscow Coup Attempt

Disc Four:
CD4-01 (S7) Russian Man Complete
CD4-02 (S8) YT
CD4-03 (S10A) 555 Konec
CD4-04 (S11) Preska
CD4-05 (S12) Cherta
CD4-06 (S13) Count In Russian
CD4-07 (S13) Count In Russian
CD4-08 (S14) 1-10 Announcement
CD4-09 (S14) 1-10 Announcement
CD4-10 (S) Counting in Polish
CD4-11 (S17A) Konec Konec
CD4-12 (S19) Pozor
CD4-13 (S21) Russian Lady Test Count And Message
CD4-14 (S25) Russian Man
CD4-15 (V2A) Spanish Lady (2 Finals)
CD4-16 (V5) Spanish Counting
CD4-17 (V5A) Spanish Counting
CD4-18 (V7) Spanish Man
CD4-19 (V6) Spanish Lady
CD4-20 (V6) Spanish Lady
CD4-21 (V8) Eastern Music Station
CD4-22 (V8) Eastern Music Station
CD4-23 (V) Unidentified Chinese Station
CD4-24 (V12) NNN
CD4-25 (V18) NNN
CD4-26 (V19) Whiskey Tango Veinte Y Uno
CD4-27 (XC) The Crackle
CD4-28 (XM) The Backwards Music Station
CD4-29 (XF) Faders
CD4-30 (XW) Workshop
CD4-31 (XX) The Pip
CD4-32 (XB) The Buzzer
CD4-33 (M1) M1 (197)
CD4-34 (M1B) M1B (463)
CD4-35 (M2) M2 (712)
CD4-36 (M3) M3
CD4-37 (M3) M3
CD4-38 (M3) M3
CD4-39 (M3) M3
CD4-40 (M3) M3
CD4-41 (M3) M3
CD4-42 (M3A) M3A
CD4-42 (M3B) M3B


DOWNLOAD some numbers HERE!