Paul Kelday – "Worlds Apart" (Integrated Circuit Records - ICR) 1982

He may strike a passing resemblance to David Koresh, but Paul Kelday made better ambient electronic lunar landscapes than the long deceased leader of the Davidian cult in Waco could manage inbetween impregnating as many female followers as possible, and writing misspelled gospels for the US Customs. Not to say, that Paul Kelday didn't have any ambient groupies himself, but we'll probably never know.Especially as any fact finding mission would be severely hampered by the sad truth of Paul's untimely death.Which leaves the intriguing possibility that Dave and Paul could be jamming with Jesus on stage in heaven's infinite concert room at the end of the multi multiverse beyond the end of the wormhole that Paul always seems to capture the sound of, electronically,on many of his self-released C- ∞ cassettes.

Yes it does sound like the soundtrack for the Forbidden Planet,or Tangerine Dreams first album,as any possible melody is lost under a boiling ocean of analogue effects.....but what's wrong with that?

So, if You want more Kelday? Click on de Paul Kelday Label at de bottom of de post.Rrrrasta Far Out!

DOWNLOAD keldays departed world colliding with another departed world HERE!

Mark Stewart – "As The Veneer Of Democracy Starts To Fade" (Mute – STUMM 24) 1985

Them Sugar Hill Gang bangers got everywhere in the 80's didn't they? Here replacing Grandmaster Flash with erstwhile lead screecher from The Pop Group, Mark Stewart. No subtlety here from absent lovers rock producer Dennis Bovell, who dubbed up The Pop Group's debut LP "Y" six years earlier, not with Adrian Sherwood at the controls there ain't. It's all there,distorted max feedback tape echo, Keith LeBlanc's thudding and crashing electro-industrial style drum samples, William S. Burroughs croaking his  control data parables, and Mark himself spouting his sixth-form Politics of paranoia. An alternative left-field classic spouting some forgivable soap-boxing, and various things of the Pissed-Off variety.

There was even a time that I would even suggest that this was my favourite album!?...but tech fatigue, and a strong miners strike allergy, forced me to look elsewhere for my mashed up dance rhythms.....but... HEY!....don't let that put you off. Nowadays this stands out like a shiny beacon of joy in these post-music days. Everything produced since the turd of the century is at best pointless, and at worst, totally human free, shat out by robots for a blank generation breast fed on very similar sounding short meaningless bursts for (south)Korean-a-like clones with zero rated attention spans dancing to their own AI chosen algorithms. 

Mark Stewart would explain it all for you, but he's Dead. The best I can do is post this LP as the veneer of Democracy fades to shit to the sound of the Auto-tuner.

Tracklisting:

1 Passivecation Program
2 Bastards
3 The Resistance Of The Cell
4 Untitled
5 As The Veneer Of Democracy Starts To Fade
6 Pay It All Back
7 Hypnotised
8 Slave Of Love
9 The Waiting Room

10 Hypnotised (remix)

11 Dreamers

DOWNLOAD to veneer your ears HERE!

Keith LeBlanc – "Major Malfunction" (World Records – WR 005) 1986

Keith LeBlanc was the only white boy in the Sugar Hill Gang Village, hence the name. So to win the respect of the majority Black members of America's premier Hip-Hop collective Keith had to show off his technologically enhanced and Electro-influenced Drum style.

Just as Robin Hood and Little John fought each other in a sickening display of male machismo flailing staffs over what i can only imagine was the 12th century River Trent?

Like two medieval rappers free-styling their way towards a state of mutual appreciation ....sickening I know, but thats what they do innit.

Naturally LeBlanc gained their respect, and he, Doug Winbush, Skip MacDonald from the Furious Five,and Tackhead,ran off to the UK and joined up with pasty-faced mad Dub Professor Adrian Sherwood, and together took all that Electro hip-hop and turned it into something altogether more dark and Industrial to lure more pasty-faced White kids in long overcoats towards something they could at last tap their German army dead stock para-boots to.

This release being, allegedly, a Keith LeBlanc solo album.

Whose beats are heavy, dubbed up and distorted,and included a few tunes that appear elsewhere over many of those Tackhead Sound system records. It all sounds so dated these days, with W.S. Burroughs analogue samples,jousting with all the kinda stuff you expected from "My Life In The Bush Of Ghosts"

or a Holgar Czukay solo album around that time.

Funnily enough The Eno/Byrne/Czukay stuff has dated far better than the On-U-Sound stable,mainly because of LeBlanc's drums I hesitate to suggest.

However it does have a certain Industrial charm about it all,as no-one makes music like this anymore,.....except for a laugh.

Tracklist:

1 Get This

2 Major Malfunction
3 Heaven On Earth
4 Object-Subject (Breakdown's Not Enough)
5 I'll Come Up With Something
6 Move
7 Technology Works Dub
8 You Drummers Listen Good

9 Einstein Mad Dub

DOWNLOAD to function HERE!

Boards Of Canada – "Old Tunes Vol. 2" (Music70 – CANCAS003) 1996

Wow!? this Duo must have invented everything chill room infesting and bedroom festering one could care to imagine, it says 1985 to '96 here!? Not that it sounds like it was recorded on one of those cassette four track portastudios which I assume they must have used, with a noise reduction system that can only have been left behind by fleeing Aliens.

Just listening to this stuff makes me smug enough to lie about how many O-Levels i got in 1983,or is that a Dostoevsky in your pocket or do you like Intelligent Dance Music?

What these Scottish chum bums were doing making music like this in the mid-eighties has ones middle finger resting firmly on the 'dubious' button and another finger up each others arses.

As Pre-post-Club as this may seem, fill in the blank space,(_______).It is this partially inflated,dryly punchline shy, self-indulgent and occasionally clever-clever, attempt to be the Pet shop boys without any Pet Shop boys, does massage ones own 'I was there first' Dorsal vein enough to claim to have been listening to 'Intelligent Dance Music' before Aphex Twin was even born.

I used to say these things about The Fall,but have now cut it down to just preferring the 'Early Stuff'? Which is no doubt what Autechre fans say about Boards Of Canada.

Track List:


A1 We've Started Up 5:39
A2 Jimbo Rehearsing 0:35
A3 Staircase Whip 2:14
A4 Statue Of Liberty 1:52
A5 Dave (I'm A Real Traditionalist) 1:50
A6 Peace/Tony/Devil 0:18
A7 To The Wind 2:30
A8 Iraq Says 0:38
A9 Nine-Rubber Wisdom 1:20
A10 On A Rolling Sea 1:34
A11 Iced Cooly Beatnik 0:36
A12 David Came To Mahana'im 4:39
A13 Sir Prancelot Brainfire 2:51
A14 North Sea Arbeit 1:12
A15 Mushyz 0:35
A16 Heysanna Hosanna 0:59
A17 Fly In The Pool 0:51
A18 Mukinabaht 5:05
A19 It's A Whole 'Nother Year 2:00
B1 Kiteracer 2 2:29
B2 BMX Track 5:05
B3 Hiscores 3:38
B4 Geometric Piss 0:51
B5 Zander Two 3:59
B6 Magic Teens 3:00
B7 Apparatus 0:33
B8 Music For Pylons 1:12
B9 Alpha Rainbow 1:12
B10 Northern Plastics 1:55
B11 Buckie High 5:16
B12 I Love My New Shears 3:11
B13 Solarium 0:22
B14 Breaking Nehushtan 2:41
B15 Orange Hexagon Sun 2:22
B16 Lick 2:39
B17 Powerline Misfortune 1:15

DOWNLOAD bored in scotland HERE!

Boards Of Canada – "A Few Old Tunes" (Music70) 1996

 

Hands Up anyone who thought Boards of Canada were from Canada?

Ah......only me it seems!?

Two smart-arsed Scottish brothers....no not Black Scottish, they were actually proper brothers,as in genetically brothers from the same mother.

Well that's as Funky as it gets i'm afraid, as we are gently lulled to sleep by a myriad of rejected downtempo leftfield LP fillers recorded from 1991 to 1995. If you made it through this without going into a coma, then I shall hold back on the Bored of Canada quips.

Nah, i'm just being rude, its the perfect background accompaniment for a bored game such as Dungeons and Dragons,which boasts a twenty sided dice,while side two has a two sided cassette of fifteen tracks a side.

And like D&D, it is played and listened to by home dwelling geeks nerds and further education technophiles, who have an undiagnosed need to be thought of as Intelligent.Hence this disdainful post club glitch-fest and its even more Disdainful genre, laughably monikered IDM, or, Intelligent Dance Music......not that Geeks and Nerds, or anybody, actually Dances to this awkward Electronica,by Bored of Scotland.

The stoopider sections of society can in fact dance to anything,aided by the stoopid person's super-power.....a total lack of self-awareness, or get off yer Tits on drugs.

However, good to see those Aphex-a-like kids still embracing the freedom of DIY to put out yer own material on cassette,and photocoping up a hand scribbled insert,without the need of no record company man.

Tracklist:

A1 Spectrum 2:19
A2 Light, Clear Hair 0:41
A3 P.C. 0:48
A4 Trapped 3:52
A5 Rodox Video 1:19
A6 Happy Cycling 1:49
A7 House Of Abin'adab 1:55
A8 Finity 5:00
A9 Forest Moon 6:35
A10 Skimming Stones 2:12
A11 Carcan 1:50
A12 Devil 0:14
A13 Mansel 5:36
A14 She Is P 1:42
A15 Davie Addison 1:15
B1 Sac 1:23
B2 Blockbusters 0:40
B3 I Will Get It Tattooed 1:37
B4 The Way You Show 2:56
B5 I Love U 1:41
B6 King Of Carnival 4:18
B7 M9 3:32
B8 Original Nlogax 1:11
B9 Sequoia 4:49
B10 Boqurant 1:43
B11 5.9.78 4:14
B12 Wendy Miller 0:32
B13 Paul Russell's Piece 0:53
B14 Up The March Bank 3:24
B15 Nova Scotia Robots 1:47

DOWNLOAD almost intelligently HERE!

Various Artists – "The Philosophy Of Sound And Machine" (Applied Rhythmic Technology (ART) – art 2 cd) 1992

When things start going all Highfalutin,the nerds reappear from their lair, and try and fix the stuff the Alpha-Males did while they were away. Sick of getting ambient sand from the chill out room kicked in their collective spotty visage-s, they normally attach the word 'Intelligent' as a pronoun, enabling them to look down their lengthy olfactory organs at the Rave kids who had reduced electronic music to merely a medium for dancing like the Twats they were.

Privileged teen-persons from Cornwall, who dug surfing during the daytime, but at night they became the brain of acid house, and invented a kind of background music in their bedroom that embraced such non-musical nonsense as the 'Glitch',and all those sounds no-body had previously thought of using for that post-club party venue in one of Truro's more neglected neighborhoods. Posh they were, and posh they will stay,but it became trendy in those northern clubs to carry a vinyl copy of "Selected Ambient Works" by a certain famous Glitch obsessed Cornish-man*, from which we get stuff like Squarepusher, Drill'n'Bass, Plug and Christwagon,being the same person, not forgetting the great too skool to be cool name-dropee darlings,of older skatebordem dressing...er... ,yes that's right, its only bloody Autechre innit? Beaming down from that chilled jail cell they seem to have inhabited since the exact location of the multiverse starseed was discovered.

Intelligent Dance Music they called it,scarring it as the only musical style in Christendom to actually patronize the listener more that it entertains.......and of course it certainly ain't for dancing to.Look ma I'm Dancin' , I have O-Levels and I don't care!I dance with my Brain mom!

* Aphex Twin aka Richard D. James, who, incidentally, contributes track 13 to this splendid Compact Disc,which means you can make it sound even further 'out' there by merely scratching the disc with your favourite nail scissors.

Tracklist:

1 Future/Past– Nebula Variation 5:53
2 Q-Chastic– CAT 002 3:58
3 Soit - P.P.– n.IASP 5:03
4 Red Cell*– Bio - Dimension 5:54
5 Neuro Politique*– Artemis (Mayday Mix)5:54
6 Kosmik Kommando*– Remember The Feeling6:25
7 Cmetric– Debris 8:40
8 Balil– The Whirling Of Spirits 5:52
9 Esoterik– Pursuit 5:08
10 Future/Past– T.R.Y. 2004 Funk 5:20
11 Twelve Days Of Night– Trance 6:08
12 Balil– Small Energies 6:08
13 Blue Calx – Blue Calx 7:15

DOWNLOAD from the cornish Illuminati HERE! 

Biff'um Baff'um Boys – "Bombers Over Baghdad" (G-Force Records – YIKES 997T) 1990

Nothing's fucking changed has it?

No its not another posthumous release by Muslimgauze,but some politically aware Rave Techno by a group of persons who clearly grew up on a diet of Industrial Funk, such as Tackhead, 400 Blows,23 Skidoo and the like, along with other spin offs therein...like...er...Muslimgauze?

This could easily be rearranged to read Bombers over Tehran, and hopefully predicts a future of Bombers over the East Wing Ballroom,while a certain Ginger Cunt is surveying the stairways that go nowhere, and rooms you can no longer get into. An errant hi-jacked Bomber with a full payload could do good taste a massive favour by flattening the illegal structure before the Washington DC City council does it them selves.....with, of course, the ginger minger becoming collateral damage like the thousands of children the fucker has on his International Court Of Justice charge sheet along with his Bum Buddy BiBi,who very frankly should be hung on live TV.

Tracklist:

A1 Tarmac Tension
A2 Five Minutes
AA1 Bombing
AA2 Chemical Weapons

DOWNLOAD the friendly bombs HERE!

Various Artists– "Street Sounds-Electro 10" (Street Sounds – ELCST 10) 1985

Did I say Don't Mention The WAR!??

Is this record a warning from History, or did a Hip Hop Nostradamus write these dope lyrics?

"Star Raid" is an obvious reference to ballistic missiles passing through Space in a sub earth orbit raining down on Europe's civilian Infrastructure.....its all so clear to me now.

OMG! aka Oh.My.Allan, we're all gonna DIE.....AGAIN!?

Of course, Allan's radical Hip-Hop Cleric Brother from another mother ,has no father,has no Halo in a coat of many colours. The parthenagenecally created Divine D.J. Born Supreme Allah, is destined to be the Iranian lead monkey to actually press the GO! button that carries all that notorious,hiding, WMD-grade 60% pure Uranium sellotaped to the back of one of those imaginary long range missiles aimed at Diego Garcia, destroying 25% of the US Fleet in the process, and causing enough Fall-Out to bleach the Maldives clean of all foreign interference....for good!

After all,original prophecy-boy himself,D.J. Nostradamus, predicted a 7 month War in the Middle East.....can't see that happening can you?.....then comes the predictions greatest HIT,Rivers of Blood....pull the other one Nosher.....and then....Oh No!..a swarm of Bees....which is an obvious reference to the Drones.....no not the bandwagon jumping Punk group 'The Drones' from Manchester,UK, '77;...i'm talking weaponized Drones here, the ones that have been pummeling everyone east of the Mason-Dixon line, or Poland, since the start of the Ukraine war.

This is all a Proven FACT!......ask Donald Trump, He's known all this since way back before The Trump University started taking students money.

Well, it's gonna Kick Off innit.....OUCH! there goes my bone spurs again!

You better start Praying to his holiness the godlike'D.J. Born Supreme Allah' NOW!....or you will miss out on that coveted Martyrs death and, more importantly those 72 Virgins a martyr entering the kingdom of a christian free Heaven will receive. What happens to those innocent Lady-creatures I dread to imagine.....but Wait a minute!!!!?... aren't Virgins as shit in Bed as you are boys????

Come kindly nukes and rain down death and misery on the Oval Office.

Tracklist:

A1 Tricky Tee– Johnny The Fox
A2 Roxanne Shanté– Bite This
A3 The Dynamic Duo - Ft Knights Of The Turntables
A4 19th Fleet– Star Raid
B1 Run-D.M.C.– Together Forever
B2 M.C. Craig "G"– Transformer
B3 D.J. Born Supreme Allah– Two, Three, Break
B4 Freestyle– Don't Stop The Rock

DOWNLOAD! for the tenth time I said DOWNLOAD!....HERE!

Various Artists - "Street Sounds - Electro 9" ( ELCST 9) 1985

Like hunter gatherers these Crate Diggers scoured the used records section of junk stalls,and thrift stores looking for new breaks from the forgotten failures of the recent past.As if searching for fresh meat beneath the rotting vegetables of a throw away society.

Most junk vinyl has at least one nanosecond of interesting noise to repurpose. And back in the halcyon days before E-fucking-Bay ,sickeningly sussed 'vintage' vinyl peddlers, and fucking Discogs! All this stuff is no longer refreshingly cheap!? One Jazzy album,any Jazzy album,now goes for the price of a Roland TB303. 

Some of these sought after breaks often found themselves bought, or destroyed en masse by 'top' Rap acts and their management (the CIA) if only to stop their rivals getting to them first 

The 'Tech' gear of the early eighties is another accidentally timeless factor in the creation of this nu genre, whom some would suspect was the new Kontrol music created by the security services of the planet. Lets face it, all the Top Rap acts were and are got at by Ep-stain , filmed in flagrente-delicto with a 13 year old girl,which is highly illegal.....like Putin has on Trump, including the Pee-Pee party, where he was pissed on by a Putin supplied sex worker. This is what P-Diddy was doing too by the way.......its all proved...honest.

Well, this early generation of the Hip-Hop epoch, didn't rely on basing their childish rhymes on top of an obvious sample to carry the tune,they spent their spare time emptying the junk shops of rejected solid state Tech that White Guys didn't want, and made it work. The DMX, TR808,third hand Technics turntables and the aforementioned uber squelchy Roland Bassline. Simple but effective,and it made the Kids dance.......bloody Kids!!!

Tracklist:

1 Doug E. Fresh & Get the Fresh Crew– The Show
2 Bad Boys– Bad Boys Ft K-Love
3 D.St.– The Home Of Hip Hop
4 Kid Frost– Terminator
5 World Class Wreckin' Cru– World Class
6 Mantronix– Needle To The Groove
7 Fat Boys– The Fat Boys Are Back
8 Rock Master Scott & The Dynamic Three– The Roof Is On Fire

DOWNLOAD to avoid another invite to a p-diddy pee pee party HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 8"(Street Sounds – ELCST 8) 1985

Don't have much to say about this one, which includes slagging it off, so by elimination this must be a good one?......right?

It's,if anything, a bit Disco-Lite and his slaggo-lettes, with most of the tracks displaying a preposterous preponderance for old school Rapping, lashings of vocoder abuse,early sampler misuse,vinyll-ill treatment and DMX maltreatment with some inappropriate gated digital reverb.

It is certainly of its time,which is why we like it innit?

Tracklist:

A1 Sparky D Vs. The Playgirls– The Battle
A2 Davy DMX– The DMX Will Rock (Rap Mix)
A3 Aleem– Confusion
A4 D.E.F. & D.J. Three D – D.E.F. Momentum
B1 Marley Marl– Marley Marl Scratch
B2 The B Boys– Girls
B3 Papa Austin +The Great Peso– Wrong Girls To Play With (Dub)
B4 N.Y.C. Cutter– D.J. Cuttin

DOWNLOAD keepin' it alive since 1985 HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 7" (Street Sounds – ELCST 7) 1985

Post Elvis,1985 was once looked upon as the official worst year of music evah! Live Aid happened,and the possibilities of world corporate mass control of young peoples personal taste became very real.....meanwhile on the streets of the five boroughs no-one had heard of "We are the World" by the bloated morons of superstars immodest bleatings about saving poor African children like the Gods they thought they were.None of them thought about trying to save the poor american children from Never Land,and a glass or two of 'Jesus Juice'.

Wacko Jacko did,after all, receive the child-like lyrics channeled from God almighty himself, after a suggestion from his Holiness  Lionel Ritchie of course.Well, God can't be good at everything can he?

The Uk's charity single's words weren't much better....so "Tonight Thank God it's Them Instead Of You"...oozed Bozo...i mean Bono.You couldn't make that up!

Now, what the kids on the city street were actually doing,without interference from any Gods, Mortal or otherwise, was filling their empty lives and empty bellies dancing in dat new Breakdancin' stylee.To an abstract version of Kraftwerk and other European synth-pop acts,weaved in with all those Japanese electronic toys that no-one wanted.

No need for Gods, or Poop stars, who feel it worthy of themselves to save us all from ourselves.

"Its a choice we're making, we're saving our own lives!?".....it's all Me Me Me innit? The malignant narcissists of the poop charts; want us poor people to donate to other starving poor people while the brutal dictators of the targeted desert areas of famine, spend it all on new weapons to recruit those very same African children into the Peoples Army.All this goodness, while Lionel and Michael allow us to bathe in their magnanimous and Holy light.

 

Tracklist:

A1 Egyptian Lover - Girls (remix Long Version)
A2 The Unknown DJ– 808 Beats (Club Mix)
A3 Knights Of The Turntables– Fresh Mess (Jam ... Your Radio)
B1 Roxanne Shanté– Queen Of Rox (Shantë Rox On) (Street Version)
B2 The Fearless Four– Dedication
B3 Chris "The Glove" Taylor– Itchiban Scratch
B4 The B-Boys– Stick Up Kid

DOWNLOAD and thank god its them instead of you HERE!

Various Artists– "Street Sounds Electro 6" (Street Sounds – ELCST 6) 1984

 

"The Roxanne Wars", as these call and response rap songs on side one are known as,featuring a 14 year old Female old school Rapper called....you guessed it "Roxanne".She took it on herself to challenge UTFO's hit tune "Roxanne, Roxanne".Of which there were over one hundred response Raps by Herself and various pseudonymous artists.Likely to avoid the authorities causing problems over Roxannes's tender age.Almost a concept albums worth of fem-rap featuring a teenage rapper trying her best to avoid sounding like a kid on Sesame Street doing a rap about the number 'Nine' and the letter 'A'......something I think would enjoy almost as much as her cutesy battles with UTFO.

This one's one of the better releases in the 'Electro' series.

The Rapping doesn't get on yer Titz, plenty vocoder, Human Beat Boxing ,Scratching, gated Reverb, and even some early Bleep-core deep in the mix.

"All the Freaks come out at night" says Whodini......except Roxanne who was too old anyway for Trump,to protect her from Geoffrey Epstein......if you're reading this years later, Epstein was a human trafficker who supplied young ladies for the Rich,Stupid and Powerful,which brought down the Trump administration when some formerly redacted files were found to have photographs of President Trump in Inflagrante delicto with several teenage girls...not Roxanne I'm pleased to say(I Hope anyway!),....and one young boy,who,who was clearly being sodomised by the Orange Monster himself.....cus that's what his Daddy ,Freddie, did to him when he was a little innocent Moron.....as alleged by Donald's Sister Mary Trump.......it's true of course. 

Tracklist:

1. UTFO–Roxanne, Roxanne
2.The Real Roxanne With UTFO–The Real Roxanne
3.Capt. Rock– Cosmic Blast
4.Roxanne Shanté– Roxanne's Revenge
5.Whodini– Freaks Come Out At Night
6.Egyptian Lover– My House (On The Nile)
7.Bobby Broom– Beat Freak
8.Dougé Fresh– Just Having Fun (Do The Beat Box)
9.Dougy Fresh– The Original Human Beat Box

DOWNLOAD for roxanne's green light HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 5" (Street Sounds – ELCST 5)1984)

Unfortunately ,there's too much of that 'old Skool' rapping that sounds like a Caucasian office worker getting down with the groove at the office Christmas Party, not unlike David Brent doing some street dance for charity in The Office...original version. Fusing Flashdance with MC Hammer Shit yeah? (David Brents words not mine!)

But at least its quaint and not the kind of hate speech that passes for Rap during the last three decades.

There be a half decent Arthur Baker tchoon,that's fitting for a former New Order collaborator,it just lack's a Peter Hook.

We also got some proto-turntablism from the Knights of the Turntables for your Dad to shape some breaks to.

Some nonsense from Capt Rock's bordering on Novelty Track status,with more of that Office Party style Rapping again.

Ending with the best track on the whole disk, "B Boys Breakdance" by The High Fidelity Three.

Tracklist:1.Great Peso & Mr. Nasty– It's Time To Rock
2.Dr. Jeckyll & Mr. Hyde– Fast Life
3.Knights Of The Turntables– Techno Scratch
4.The Egyptian Lover – Egypt Egypt
5.Arthur Baker– Breakers Revenge
6.Captain Rock– Capt. Rock To The Future Shock
7.Aleem– Release Yourself
8.Fantasy Three– The Buck Stops Here
9.High Fidelity Three– B Boys Breakdance

DOWNLOAD some flashdance and MC Hammer shit HERE!

Various Artists – Street Sounds Electro 4 (Street Sounds – ELCST 4) 1984

Oi! Careful who you calling a sucker you Cheeky Fuckers!

I'll piss on your fucking silly Trilby's 

Run-DMC had the,... not-so....,Bright idea of fusing Hip Hop with white Rock.

At the time (1983) I was blissfully innocent of Aerosmith's existence and the pure liquid evil of their frankly Fucking awful sub-Zep rip off of Led Zep.Who the fuck was that dick breaking through the wall on the set of the "Walk This Way" video. This Cunt was allegedly exceedingly famous on American FM (stands for Fuck me!) radio.Nestling, all cosey-like,in the sweaty armpits of Page and Plant.In between shagging under-age girls,and bumming a few easily impressed male American idiots.

I Humbly apologize to America that four English sex abusers were allowed to come over to your fine land and wreak such unforgivable havoc......er...well....on second thoughts, i'm not sorry at all actually.They can all go Fuck themselves,which they probably do.

Remember this is the land of Harvey Wankstain and Geoffrey Underpant Stain after all.Not forgetting Human Trafficker and honorary american idiotesse Jisslaine Max Swell.....most of whom were arrested for....wait for it....handling Swollen Goods;-)

So RUN-DMC are indeed the inspiration, if inspiration is the appropriate word for the downright blight on humanity for such unholy Hybrids as Funky Metal,Rap Metal,Limp Biscuit and the Bestiality Boys early years...Just think, no Fred Durst!..(sigh)...I hear no apology,or invoking of the fifth amendment right to silence on the grounds that Donald Trump may incriminate himself.. I wish someone had invoked the Right To Silence when Aerosmith came through that cardboard wall back in '86.

Apart from the unfortunate influence of RUN-DMC.....what are they doing on this comp anyway?.....we get three of yer DJ's standard stunts, three times,....yes the MEGAMIX! One of 'em done for us by none other than the godfather's cousin's best mate of Electro himself...Herbie Handoncock.

This one,Electro 4, sounds a tad more charty than the others in the series,but certainly still gets those toes-a-tapping.....if you're drunk enough.

Tracklist:

A1 Steps Ahead– Radio Active 6:45
A2 Pumpkin & The Profile All-Stars–Here Comes That Beat! 6:50
A3 Herbie Hancock– Megamix
DJ Mix [Megamix] – D.ST.
DJ Mix [Megamix] – D.ST. 6:18
B1 Run-DMC– Sucker M.C.'s 3:15
B2 Key-Matic– Breakin' In Space 6:16
B3 The VHB– Beethoven's Fifth (Street) Symphony 7:03
B4 Cybotron– Techno City 6:55

DOWNLOAD wankstain epstain and dorsal vein, solicitors of underage sex HERE!

Various Artists - "Streetsounds Electro 3 (Street Sounds – ELCST 3) 1984

 

More from the Cambrian Oceans of Old Skool Hip Hop,from before they....the Rap-Singers ....regularly called out the Female of this species as "Ho's" and "Bitches".I'm almost done analyzing the role of the Internet in creating this phenomenon of the INCEL in modern day society.

If you didn't know already, INCEL, the acronym, stands for Involuntarily Celibate.These Icel's ,to say the least,don't hold the Sisters in very high regard,mainly for denying them as much sex as they can get,without so much as a 'Thank You young lady. They then blame the ladies for this, and I have a strong suspicion that 21st century Rap Singers are indeed involuntarily and ,yes,...celibate. The cause of this is the unnatural habitat of the Internet ,where these frustrated rappers congregate in facebook groups,and worship such dickweeds as Andrew Tate.They never had this problem in the Old Skool of Rap,they got all the voluntary sex they needed,and as a consequence lacked that modern need for violence, both passive, and  aggressive to prove their manhood through a general display of unbridled Misogyny. None of that shit in the Old Skool......well....not much anyway.....in fact lets just say there was Less of that back in the day.Also a less liberal use of the N-Word.

I suppose we could call this glaring difference between the two 'Rap' epochs, charmingly Innocent,or naive? 

I have little or zero interest in post 1990's Hip-Hop and Rap.Basically it had reached its very low bar for creativity by the mid-90's.Bores the Shit out of me.

Personally, I prefer the tracks that don't have a Rapper...careful how you spell that one. "You've seen 'em,on the top of the pops, the Rapers,you know,you've seen 'em about,down by the multi-story, round the back of the corn exchange?.....the Rapers?......No?"......the Rap Singers.

Tracklist:

1.DivineSounds–Dollar Bill 7:50

2.Imperial Brothers– We Come To Rock 5:03
3.Newcleus– Jam On It 6:57
4.Boogie Boys– Zodiac 6:06
5.Pumpkin– King Of The Beat 4:17
6.Davy DMX– One For The Treble (Fresh) 5:17
7.Fresh 3 MC's– Fresh 5:38

DOWNLOAD some charming naivety with a beat HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 2" (Street Sounds – ELCST 2) 1983

Got some stone cold classix on this one,including the radical re-arrangment of Hip-Hop godfather Herbie Hancock's seminal electro prototype "Rockit"by the B-Boys.You know, the one that MTV refused to play because it had a Black Man in it, so to get around this blatant racism,Team Hancock, made the classic human-less video with the dancing mechanical mannequins.....its a good one albeit slightly disturbing.Hancock himself is restricted to a few appearances on a portable TV stage left.The second black artist to (Not)appear on MTV, following Peado Jackson's "Billie Jean " video.

The samples in "cuttin' Herbie, were suitably subtle,and enjoyed some co-operation with the Herb himself,which cannot be said to be the case with Grandmaster Flash and Melle Mel's "White Lines" which had clear chunks of Liquid Liquid's Cavern used by the Sugar Hill Records house band without proper permission or attribution.Moan as much as they could,the Liquid's must admit if they weren't sampled,royalties paid or not, they would have been long-forgotten today,instead of still touring since they reformed in 2008.

I notce also that Two Sisters also use the Liquid Liquid bassline, no-one seems to be bothered about that particular infringement of copyright law....and so they effing shouldn't!

Its the same argument I have to face regularly for writing this Blog.

I just cannot stand hard done by whinging Musicians,or, even worse, Music 'Fans' of whinging Musicians!Thanks to Hip-Hop culture vast amounts of forgotten and ignored music still lives on(unfortunately so does Aerosmith!),enabling the 'artists' to earn a decent living actually working for a living playing Live.Whinge Whinge Whinge, Fuck Off!

Volume 2 does however contain one of the greatest Electro numbers of the pre-House era in Hashim's "Al-Naafiysh (The Soul)", this rocks the beat enough to open the white boys' ears enough to realise that Electro wasn't invented by New Order, although Blue Monday,is a fine tune,and sold a thousand times more copies than Hashim's influential chunk of electronic grooviness.

Just like MTV,you gotta be pasty faced to get in the Charts.Systemic Racism by proxy.(usually whenever I sound as 'Woke' as this,certain conspiracy nuts and MAGA supporters awake from hibernation to hurl insults and abuse in my general direction.

Ironically "Blue Monday" was where i got off the Joy Division Bus...I thought the fuckers had sold out artistically, as well as shifting thousands of units in a loss making popularity venture.

Allegedly each copy of Blue Monday lost 5p due to the fancy cover.

Silly buggers.

Tracklist:

1.The B Boys– Two, Three, Break 5:01
2.The B Boys– Cuttin' Herbie 4:36
3.Xena– On The Upside 5:53
4.Hashim– Al-Naafiysh (The Soul) 6:06
5.Rammelzee Vs. K-Rob– Beat Bop 10:10
6.Two Sisters– B-Boys Beware (Club Mix) 5:50
7.Grandmaster & Melle Mel–White Lines(Don't Don't Do It)7:33

DOWNLOAD what joy division could have been HERE!

Various Artists – "Street Sounds Electro 1" (Street Sounds – ELCST 1) 1983

There ain't nuffink more Do It Yerself than a bunch of black kids in the ghetto with a Boom Box, a turntable, an Oberhiem DMX, a mike for the MC plus some Herbie Hancock and Gary Numan records.

As vinyl was the recognised Electro media of choice,these same kids would have a record pressing plant in their living room,while us whites stuck to the humble cassette......you can't scratch a cassette.

Me being one of those white kids,and from England, who dug Punk Rock and Industrial musick, i never even knew this shit existed,even if Malcolm Maclaren did,somehow(?), make some electro hits in 1983.....I looked down my nose at it all as merely chart fodder innit? It was totally alien to me,especially as it involved ...er...Dancing(?),which was its raison d'etre.

But, one didn't need any instruments to make it? Rather like Old Skool Industrial didn't? Could all this be the afro-american version of Throbbing Gristle? If so why does this Electro stuff sound so fucking joyful, yet the stuff I listened to was so miserable? Are whites really so disconsolate and whinging?..well..yes they,forward slash, we, are??..Hell kick my honky Ass we are,Sheeeeet mother lickers. As a previous Girl Friend suggested that I have No Joy,I'm beginning to think she may have been right?

In the post House era, I began to frequently notice records like this popping up in charity shops,as all the kids were luved-Up on those incredibly dull House style four to the floor beats. The first one i shelled  out 50p for was Electro 2, but it makes sense to start at the beginning does it not?

Lots of Scratching,lashings of Vocoder, under pinned by Akai samplers,and a Roland TR808. What more could you desire tech-wise?

Ah yeah,i should have warned you....there's some very shit Rapping on a few of these tracks,otherwise,instrumentally, its smoking HOT

Tracklist:

A1 The Packman– I'm The Packman (Eat Everything I Can) 6:35
A2 Newcleus– Jam On Revenge (The Wikki-Wikki Song) 7:49
A3 West Street Mob– Break Dancin' - Electric Boogie 5:02
A4 C-Bank– Get Wet7:52
B1 K-9 Corp Featuring Pretty C– Dog Talk 9:35
B2 G-Force – Feel The Force 7:24
B3 Project Future– Ray - Gun - Omics 6:40
B4 Captain Rock– Return Of Captain Rock 8:23

DOWNLOAD and get down HERE!

Napalm Death / Civil Defense – "Punk Is A Rotting Corpse" (Non Label-Bootleg) 1982

 

On the inauguration of the USA as an official Roque state.I feel it fittingly appropriate that one does a vicious rant about the Great Orange mistake itself,but couldn't think of anything Death Metally as an introduction.

So,I thought,hmmmm How about something appropriately fraudulent like a bootlegged Napalm Death fake Demo cassette,without any actual Napalm Death on it,except three tracks by an American Hardcore band no-ones ever heard of....or as Trump would say,a Beautiful american Hardcore band that no-ones ever heard of before"....in this case some fuckers called Civil Defense (note the american spelling). 

An early incarnation of Napalm Death were incidentally also called briefly, Civil Defence (note correct spelling),which is why the fuck up of having three tracks by Civil Defense happened.The bootleggers obviously thought this was Napalm Death? The actual Napalm Death track was stolen from Bullshit Detector 3,and is track 1,the snappily titled "The Crucifixion Of Possessions".

Above all that,the lads from Napalm,never released anything called 

"Punk Is A Rotting Corpse",especially NOT in 1982.

At least we can change the title for our own purposes,and rename it "Trump will be A Rotting Corpse".....hopefully soon eh?

Behold! The festering carcass of American Rot shoved into an ill fitting suit: the sleaze of a con-man, the cowardice of a draft dodger, the gluttony of a parasite, the racism of a klansman, the Sexism of a back alley creep, the ignorance of a bar stool drunk, and the greed of a hedge-fund Ghoul. All spray painted Orange and presented like a prize piggie at a Redneck country fair . Not a president, not even a man or just a mammal,the world's worst human,and the worlds worst Mammal wrapped up in one. Just a vile diseased distillation of everything America says it isn't but always has been and will be forever more.Arrogance dressed up as exceptionalism, stupidity passed off as common sense, cruelty sold as toughness, Greed exalted as ambition, and corruption worshiped like the gospel Donald is so blissfully unaware of.

It's America's darkest shadow made flesh, a rotting pumpkin shaped halloween idol.Proving that when a nation kneels before money power and spite,it doesn't lose its soul, it shits out this bloated obscenity and calls it a leader!?

Tracklist:

1 Napalm Death– The Crucifixion Of Possessions
2 Civil Defense– Don‘t Bother
3 Civil Defense– Enough
4 Civil Defense– Dysfunction

DOWNLOAD this rotting corpse HERE!

Carcass – "Flesh Ripping Sonic Torment" (Self-Released ) 1987

 Ahhh, some Death Metal from the home of the Beatles(Liverpool for gen Z),which sounds like Helter Skelter fed through a cheap distortion pedal and cement mixer......except this ain't Death Metal is it? It's Grindcore innit?

Chief Grinder, Bill Steer, was in Napalm Death for one album....."Scum" I think.So, the relevance of this post was to make a connection between Carcass and the early disemboweling grind of Napalm Death.

However, Bill Steer, was to leave and missed Napalm stalwart Shane Embury joining, like ships in the night,after leaving Warhammer,whom we featured in the previous post.

Most of the musicians....musicians???....in these groups were interchangeable, so no determinable difference was made, and a smooth transition was easily achievable.

The Thesaurus for this entire genre is but a slim volume,concentrating mainly on technical Autopsy references, and different,but the same, forms of putrefaction. Poetry it ain't,but it does convey rotting meat as some kind of alternative Flower representing the horrific ugliness of humankind....an image best represented by a naked Donald Trump....of you can imagine that without losing your mind?

I did also have a pint with Napalm Death,at Leicester University....of course i asked for an autograph for my children,so I provided a Fag Packet and Mick Harris dutifully wrote "Salamanderrrr Autopsy Doss, from Mick Harris". I sold them on Yahoo auctions (remember them?) as part of a package I made up, with The Napalm Death Peel Sessions CD, which skipped like a fucker.....a bit like this tape!? More fun facts>>> This tape was recorded in 22 minutes,but still managed to sound better than the debut album, "Reek Of Putrefaction.

PS isn't "Die in Pain" actually shorter than " You Suffer"? if you remove the count in on drum sticks?

PPS : Check out Stewart Lee on going Orienteering with Naplam Death

Tracklist:

A1 Genital Grinder 1:19
A2 Regurgitation Of Giblets 1:29
A3 Festerday 0:14
A4 Limb From Limb 1:01
A5 Rotten To The Gore 2:51
A6 Excreted Alive 0:56
A7 Malignant Defecation 1:54
A8 Fermenting Innards 2:31
A9 Necro-Cannibal Bloodfeast 1:41
A10 Psychopathologist 1:26
A11 Die In Pain 0:02
A12 Pungent Excruciation 3:01
A13 Face Meltaaargh 1:12

DOWNLOAD your orienteering map with all the boundaries crossed off here!

Warhammer - "Abbatoir of Death" (Self-Released cassette) 1985

 

Future Napalm Death members' short lived but seminal UK Death Metal combo Warhammer ,guide us through a sonic Abbatoir of Death,as opposed to an Abbatoir of happy moo-cows,and fluffy bunnies. 

Meat is Murder,but there ain't nothing nerdier than a bunch of depressed Incels who play ear bleeding variants of the metal genre. One of my recent obsessions is male disambiguation, creating a portmanteau for self-loathing involuntary celibates,who stoop to admiring Misogynist Terrorists and in some cases,when pornography isn't enough, become such a frustrated bum hole as to bludgeon any unfortunate woman who spurns their awkward advances to Death, or in this case Death Metal.

So instead of blaming, objectifying, and denigrating women and girls as a result of their inability to 'pull a bird' some involuntarily celibate young men are now turning to the cathartic cleansing power  of Death Metal noise, which these special unkempt young men,usually metal-heads, can now use to replace anti-fem feelings of repressed hatred with the purging potency of a Heavy Metal variant.

I guess it doesn't help to be an active fan of such a genre that has so very few members of the fairer sex participating within. Maybe try to go a bit Indie, or dancey and you WILL get laid.Leave the Death metal for private moments, in between the wanking.

Tracklist:

A1 Halloween
A2 Blood On Satans Claw
A3 Satans Angel
A4 Carnal Lust
A5 Prophecy
A6 Abattoir Of Death

DOWNLOAD and get hammered HERE!