Various Artists – "The Philosophy Of Sound And Machine" (Applied Rhythmic Technology (ART) – art 2 cd) 1992

When things start going all Highfalutin,the nerds reappear from their lair, and try and fix the stuff the Alpha-Males did while they were away. Sick of getting ambient sand from the chill out room kicked in their collective spotty visage-s, they normally attach the word 'Intelligent' as a pronoun, enabling them to look down their lengthy olfactory organs at the Rave kids who had reduced electronic music to merely a medium for dancing like the Twats they were.

Privileged teen-persons from Cornwall, who dug surfing during the daytime, but at night they became the brain of acid house, and invented a kind of background music in their bedroom that embraced such non-musical nonsense as the 'Glitch',and all those sounds no-body had previously thought of using for that post-club party venue in one of Truro's more neglected neighborhoods. Posh they were, and posh they will stay,but it became trendy in those northern clubs to carry a vinyl copy of "Selected Ambient Works" by a certain famous Glitch obsessed Cornish-man*, from which we get stuff like Squarepusher, Drill'n'Bass, Plug and Christwagon,being the same person, not forgetting the great too skool to be cool name-dropee darlings,of older skatebordem dressing...er... ,yes that's right, its only bloody Autechre innit? Beaming down from that chilled jail cell they seem to have inhabited since the exact location of the multiverse starseed was discovered.

Intelligent Dance Music they called it,scarring it as the only musical style in Christendom to actually patronize the listener more that it entertains.......and of course it certainly ain't for dancing to.Look ma I'm Dancin' , I have O-Levels and I don't care!I dance with my Brain mom!

* Aphex Twin aka Richard D. James, who, incidentally, contributes track 13 to this splendid Compact Disc,which means you can make it sound even further 'out' there by merely scratching the disc with your favourite nail scissors.

Tracklist:

1 Future/Past– Nebula Variation 5:53
2 Q-Chastic– CAT 002 3:58
3 Soit - P.P.– n.IASP 5:03
4 Red Cell*– Bio - Dimension 5:54
5 Neuro Politique*– Artemis (Mayday Mix)5:54
6 Kosmik Kommando*– Remember The Feeling6:25
7 Cmetric– Debris 8:40
8 Balil– The Whirling Of Spirits 5:52
9 Esoterik– Pursuit 5:08
10 Future/Past– T.R.Y. 2004 Funk 5:20
11 Twelve Days Of Night– Trance 6:08
12 Balil– Small Energies 6:08
13 Blue Calx – Blue Calx 7:15

DOWNLOAD from the cornish Illuminati HERE! 

Various Artists – "It's Unheard Of (14 Full Power Heavy Metal / Rock Tracks ...)"- (Sane Records – SANE 002) 1984

A rather more obscure NWOBHM collection from Sane Records,who put out a couple of other sister compilations in their short tenure, one being a Punky effort, and the other a minimal synth classic,both of which are featured on this lovely blog......just click the clicky blue bits and you'll be taken there.

This 14 tracker has a wide cross-section of British metal,leaning towards a poppy orientation.Surprisingly,nothing actually made me laugh until track 12, "Encounter" by Sapphire.The first words of this dreadful Ballad give you a clue,.... "She was my lady",who had unfortunately died some time before of an unrevealed illness...either that or she fell off his Honda C-50 while riding pillion to a Sapphire Gig ,its not clear.The songs timescale isn't obvious and this was his tribute to his dead lover,apparently "She was the only one"....ahhhh,i'm welling up. 

I can see several pairs of spandex tights cladding these very misguided young men with large hairdos.I'm thinking Hair Metal here,or Glam, as we more sensibly called it in the UK.

It gets a bit scratchy towards the end,sorry, but its all in the best possible dodgy taste but largely all good fun

Tracklist:

A1 Incubus – Lost Soul
A2 Runestaff– The Games You Play
A3 Pyramid – Time Forgets A Hero
A4 Avalanche – Night Creeper
A5 Ded Engine– Renegade
A6 Research Dept.,– Mrs. Poe
A7 Hammerhead – Lochinvar
B1 Cry Wolf – Seventh Sister
B2 Shylock – Egypt
B3 Trident – The Power Of The Trident
B4 Nu-Tricx – Cry
B5 Sapphire – Encounter
B6 Kraken – Rat Race
B7 Incubus – Way Of The World

DOWNLOAD to hear the unheard HERE!

Various Artists – "Lead Weight (H.M. Rock Compilation From Neat" (Neat Records) 1981

 

A cassette only compilation from North East England, the official home of Black Metal.....mainly because Venom come from Newcastle and they have a track on this tape; "Angel Dust",which I am playing now as I type,and it seems to go on forever,despite the three minute timing printed on the insert!?...maybe it's their mate Satan fiddling with the space time continuum,the very fabric of time,giving us a small taste of listening to Venom for eternity,but only if you're naughty.

However,naughty or nice, the forty minutes of hard rocking NWOBHM,showcases various influences from Motorhead (thats gotta be  Venom innit?),plenty of poundshop Gillan-esque screaming (Blitzkrieg), and a band (Axis) who seems to want to be Queen?!

All on the legendary Neat Label from Geordie-land.....where that screechy bloke called Brian in the flat cap from AC/DC came from.

Newcastle has a lot to apologise for, especially their underachieving football team which Geordie fans seem to think are entitled as the greatest football team ever,despite achieving pretty much fuck-all in decades of existence. But at least they gave us Venom??.....even The god-awful Toy Dolls are Mackem as they came from neighboring Sunderland,so are not Geordie;but incredibly Sunderland have achieved even less than Newcastle on the football pitch.

Surprise Geordies include such luminaries as Sting, and Brian Ferry.Both very keen to hide their Geordie roots,...and who can blame them?

Eh! Hang on, didn't Penetration, the first NWOBHM band in my opinion  come from Tyne or Wear side? I did a review for the school mag in 1978 on Penetration's "Moving Targets, and dismissed it as Heavy Metal, not Punk. Of course I plagiarized paraphrased copied one of the music weeklies review section for such an outrageous assessment...but it was correct.They had that long haired chap,Fred Purser from Tygers Of Pang Tang in the band at the time,which upped the band skill level uncomfortably high.They were indeed the First New Wave of Britsh Metal band(or was that the Sex Pistols?),sneaking in under the Punk Radar, despite the crackly luminous vinyl it was pressed on.
Tracklist:

Raven – Inquisitor 3:44
White Spirit – Cheetah 4:44
Venom – Angel Dust 2:59
Axe – S.S. Giro 3:10
Blitzkrieg – Inferno 4:59
Aragorn – Noonday 2:55
Fist – Throwing In The Towel 3:40
Axis – Messiah 4:20
Bitches Sin– Down The Road 2:57
Warrior – Flying High 2:46
Satan's Empire– Soldiers Of War 6:50

DOWNLOAD a very neat compilation HERE!

Various Artists – "Roxcalibur"(Guardian Records N' Tapes – GRC 130) 1982

 

If one reads the list of personnel on the dozen or so NWOBHM bands from North Eastern England,featured on this handy compilation, we find a veritable gold mine of Britishness doing British things, with very very British names.

Where would we be without Brian and Gordon Potts of Brands Hatch? Nowhere I wager,or at least somewhere else behind a door that locks from the inside.

Then we have Steve Cabbage, demon of the keyboards for Exodus.Whose keyboard skills made the red sea collapse in itself again.I'm almost 101 percent sure that this isn't his stage nom de Plume; I envisage a hell of a time was had at school with such an unfortunate moniker, he probably even bullied himself.

Trevor Wardle,Mick Howard,Nev Larkin,Bill and Malcolm Midwood,Mick Hedley, and so on, it reads like a list of rejected drummer names for Spinal Tap 3. Virtually zero foreigners  on this very non-exotic list, except for a very disturbing appearance by some teutonic beast called Dieter Roth of....here we go again "Unter Den Linden"....where that came from I know not;but exist it does.Festering among this festival of British blanditude.

Magnolia being the interior decorating of this rocking compilation,it became necessary to make up for it on the outside,as another British pastime that almost defines them as a race, is to Rock out Man!Oh how they do like to party, even if they are called Mick,or Pete,Dave, or Trevor, they all think they are Pop Stars, and raise hell when they can.

Despite another beige christian name,Keith Moon was not the exception,but the rule.

Ahhh poor old Keith, wife beater,alcoholic,drug consumer stupidity beyond any other idiot one cares to mention;but the best bit that godd 'ol Mooney got away with was when he killed his Chauffeur by reversing his Bentley over him while drunk,no licence,no insurance and attempting to escape a gang of Skinheads after starting a fight in a pub!I doubt if any of us reading this unbelievable rock mythology would escape severe punishment for such mindless twollox!

Ha Ha Haaaa,life of the party was Mooney, wasn't he Pete Townsend? Wouldn't catch you doing that would we? Too busy doing "Research" by subscribing to internet kiddie Porn.......he walked free too??!!

Lets face it kids, all of the 60's/70's glitterati were shagging kids,beating up women,even when they were under-age,pushing class A drugs on to innocent entourage members and potential conquests, and ,basically, would be sharing a prison cell with Jimmy Savilles ghost,Rolf Harris,Glitter Johnathan King,that tit from The Lost Prophets, and frankly ,Mojo fans,The Beatles would have been banged up in 1964 if they had the same laws and attitude as today.Their manager was an Epstein after all?

The Heavy Metal acts around 1979/80 would have loved to do the same as their pervy nonce heroes,but no-one gave a shit about 'em, unless they were Iron Maiden, who were too big to get easy sex by playing Heavy Metal.....awww bless 'em.

But, let's not get distracted by our rock gods' orgiastic excess,"Roxcaliber" sounds innocent enough for me to stupidly announce.....announce, NOT, A NONCE!...Twats!

...to Stupidly announce that there are officially NO Nonces on this record.

They probably all work for the BBC now, after being sacked by Harvey WankStain, while Iron Maiden and Saxon are on the next Lolita Express plane to Epstein Island with Donald Trump at the controls.

Slay them with the Sword of Roxcalibur!

Tracklist:

A1 Black Rose – No Point Runnin'
A2 Brands Hatch – Brands Hatch
A3 Battleaxe– Burn This Town
A4 Satan– Oppression
A5 Marauder – Battlefield
A6 Unter Den Linden – Wings Of Night
A7 Skitzofrenik – Exodus
B1 Battleaxe – Battleaxe
B2 Marauder – Woman Of The Night
B3 Black Rose – Ridin' Higher
B4 Unter Den Linden – Man At The Bottom
B5 Skitzofrenik – Keep Right On
B6 Satan– The Executioner
B7 Brands Hatch – No Return

DOWNLOAD metal approved by king Arthur's dumber brother HERE!

Various Artists - "Roksnax" - (Guardian Records N' Tapes – GR C80) 1980

 

Was this label the NWOBHM arm of the Guardian newpaper,otherwise known in the satirical toilet as the Grauniad for its vast talent for misspelling as did Slade once or twice, and that metal band mentioned previously, Panza Division.

The correct spelling aside,which,for the record should have been 'Rock Snacks',The Guardian is now the foremost liberal lefty pinko news source on the planet whom Donald Jennifer Trump undoubtedly  hates viscerally all the lofty pinko's who read the Grauniad . Not that Trump can spell either, or read,or write for that matter,'Guardian Records'N'Tapes' have now sunk without trace,leaving a lengthy legacy that includes  this rather excellent shared NWOBHM  compilation. Hopefully the Orange one will sink without trace one day soon too, leaving only a fluffy yellow wig oozing its way to the surface amidst a small,foul smelling Toxic Orange Slick to further damage the ailing sea life he helped towards extinction.

Whether 'Guardian Records'N'Tapes' was sued out of existence by Trump's legal team because their boss thought it WAS the actual Guardian itself and had it removed for being Nasty Horrible people and terrible journalists, or it simply didn't sell enough copies of the bizarrely named Roksnax compilation.

Who cares why anyway,when one has this rocking fragment still in circulation.

Not a weak track amongst the 9 donated by the three hairy groops from the North East of England that we find being immolated by a cartoon dragon on the rear cover.

This record label,were also in fact responsible for the local band compilation, cheekily called "Compilation N.E.1?"....which thankfully is not a London postcode but just a jokey frolic signifying that this is a band collection from the North East of England,specifically the Sunderland area. This will undoubtedly emerge as a free download here sooner or later to add to the vast Local Compilation section on these here pages of pointless drivel.

As long as The Toy Dolls aren't on there I'll post it here soon.....oh fuking no!?......yes,just checked,they fuking are!? 

Tracklist:

A1 Samurai – Die Or Deliver
A2 Hollow Ground– Rock On
A3 Saracen – Speed Of Sound
A4 Hollow Ground– Fight With The Devil
A5 Samurai – Temptress
A6 Saracen – Fast Living
B1 Hollow Ground– Flying High
B2 Saracen – Feel Just The Same
B3 Samurai)– Knights In Painted Castles

DOWNLOAD and grab a snak HERE!

Various Artists - "Scene Of The Crime" - Suspect Records – SUS 3) 1981

Ok, I know I'm not entirely conversant in the lost language of Heavy Metal,but I am struggling as to comprehend what is exactly occurring on the cover of this NWOBHM compilation.Is that riffing metal-head attacking a Policeman with his guitar? Otherwise known as an "Axe"....lingo borrowed from  beat generation Hip Talk.

The role of the Van is not too clear,but i'm guessing that is assuming the honor of the mythical beast-like metal chariot, the  Tour Bus,and that Copper (Traffic Warden?) is standing in the way of a string of very important Heavy Metal tour dates?

I don't recognize the brand of guitar,so I can't rule out it being one of those cardboard guitars as used in Air Guitar competitions at the Soundhouse?

Now that's cleared up, the first track seems to misspell 'Panzer' as 'Panza',and no they most definitely aren't to be confused with American Noise Rockers Panzey Division....if I spelt that correctly?

Anyway, whats good enough for the Slade is good for the Panza.

Appearing from the smoggy vista's of Sheffield, with fellow misspelling cohorts Def Leppard, their Englishness is revealed by their obvious obsession with World War Two.Apart from the name, the first track they offer up is called "Blitz", which sounds a bit like an amped up Status Quo in places,certainly a heads down no nonsense mindless boogie....and why not?

Savage, do their best Motorhead impression,despite Lemmy insisting that the 'Head' were never Heavy Metal (We're Rock'n'Roll), reminding one of that very argument in the comic Strips' Heavy Metal parody, "Bad News",where the band argue about this very subject:

"I'm not going any further until I hear Alan(Vim) say we're Heavy Metal!"

A line to rival anything in Spinal Tap!

I suppose I'm more like the Jennifer Saunders character, Sally Freidman, Britain's number one hot chick music journalist.(Watch it all Here)

Back to the Good News:

Manatou gives us one of those god awful Hair Metal Ballads to show us all that they, indeed, are not Just a Heavy Metal band (see above),a crime that Tyrant seem far too keen to repeat.

It all sounds like they left the EQ settings alone for the whole album to save time from maybe a 12 hour setting.The same time someone like The Fall would have taken back in the day.

Alas,Heavy Metal,and its New Wave, is at the very least,both hilarious and entertainingly rocking....even the crap tunes to some extent.Especially when its recorded as cheaply as this.

Great Stuff,and a fine still life of British Culture that exists now here else on this planet.......well maybe on some very unusual exoworld after vomiting it through a wormhole......there i go again,Sally From Bad News!?

Tracklist:A1 Panza Division– Blitz 3:30
A2 Manitou – Manitou 3:32
A3 Savage  Let It Loose 4:15
A4 Sparta– Lords Of Time 6:07
B1 Tyrant – Day Of The Knight 3:25
B2 Panza Division – Delta 4 3:34
B3 Savage – Dirty Money 3:45
B4 Tyrant – Sanctuary 3:28
B5 Manitou – Overlord 3:39

DOWNLOAD this good news HERE!

Various Artists - "New Electric Warriors" (Logo – MOGO 4011) 1980

 

What the Effing Fuck was Logo records? Seemingly without any clue as to what The New Wave Of British Heavy Metal was about, which was mainly hanging out with fellow unwashed male adolescents with greasy collar length hair,dressed like the Ramones, and head-banging with a cardboard guitar. The music was a bit punkified,making the pistols (Sex) tempo challenge Black Sabbath as the inventors of Doom.

A lickle bird tells me that Logo used to be the Translantic label, home of all those great British Folk Revival records from the turn of the decade. I guess they had to distance themselves from anything hippy,so the Punks and Metalheads wouldn't turn their snotty noses up at the connection. They obviously missed out badly on the Punk years,the proof of which comes from the sad fact that the only New Wave band they could get was the truly awful "Tourists", you know them?....Annie Lennox and that other bloke.

Having done some research,Logo, did however has an impressive array of Novelty hits.One of which I own myself, namely "Toast" by the Streetband.....blue eyed Soul singer Paul Young provides us with the cockney-speak vocalisms....the best thing he ever did.

The boss of Logo would have told the A&R department not to miss out on this new Heavy Metal stuff, or get the elbow. Lets start with a mid-priced Compilation.....Put a motorbike and some headbanging fans on the cover, and we should be sorted?.....No?......yep that's right...NO!

I can't imagine Rob Halford riding onstage astride a green trials bike however,the Priest being an obvious influence for many of those rearranging the Marshall stacks aboard this particular sinking ship.

What those grebo-esque air guitarists are doing in the background I shudder to think, especially out in the countryside?....Maybe its the future site of the Monsters Of Rock festival....i'm thinking Donnington and East Midlands Airport here?...and how are they gonna get home in time for their Tea's.....there's only one Bike!?

Record labels are completely clueless as we all know, and, although the NWOBHM on offer here, is not half bad, but I have doubts this shifted many units in 1980. But, one does have a soft spot for anything as uninformed or oblivious as this.....especially ,the artwork.

If I was,somehow in a Metal Band, I think I'd like it to be called Vardis,who open side B with "If I Were King",the main Riff allegedly stolen by Metallica and 9 inch Nails.....whoever they are? ...the court case is ready to roll.

Tracklist:

A1 Turbo – Running
A2 Buffalo – Battle Torn Heroes
A3 Streetfighter– She's No Angel
A4 Stormtrooper – Grind 'N' Heat
A5 Tarot – Feel The Power
A6 Bastille – Hard Man
A7 Oxym– Hot Rain
A8 Dawnwatcher– Firing On All Eight
B1 Vardis– If I Were King (N.E.W. Take)
B2 Silverwing– Rock & Roll Are Four Letter Words
B3 Rhabstallion– Chain Reaction
B4 Colossus – Holding Back Your Love
B5 Workin' Nights
B6 Warrior – Still On The Outside
B7 Kosh – The Hit
B8 Race Against Time – Bedtime

DOWNLOAD and charge these new electric warriors HERE!

Various Artists - "Kent Rocks" - (White Witch Records WIT KR 101) 1981

 

Sidcup,a borough of south-east London on the northern edge of das immigration Kapital of south east England.To be more precise ,Kent, where,in 2026 you can easily pop down Dover way and waste another grey afternoon picnicking on the white chalky cliffs watching the illegal immigrants struggling in their vastly overcrowded rubber dinghys, and count the dead children recovered by the coast guards.

The last thing one would be thinking about would be the minor incursion of NWOBHM into the chalky hillocks of the Kentish coastline. Kent Rocks the boats, but Human trafficking Kills......maybe Kent Kills could be a superior title for these sad ol'days. In fact if most of these desperate migrants were subjected to 40 minutes of "Kent Rocks" they,to a man, would paddle back to France screaming. I may send a copy to the despicable Racists in the UK Parliament,as a suggestion on how to defend our shores from these brown skinned chaps in a more humanitarian way....showing them pictures of Sidcup on their way to ensure that they will never return. Admittedly, Sidcup is a marginally better option than Gaza,Eritrea or any other Genocide saturated hell hole, but boredom does kill, even in Kent.

Having labeled this provincial compilation as strictly NWOBHM,I realise this is untrue. There's some New Wave,Indie Pop and a splash of Minimal Synth pop too!? Well,its got a NWOBHM Label title,and at least 50% of it is classic NWOBHM....so as far as I'm concerned its a NWOBHM comp from the provinces of coastal Britain in 1981 when Goth and Metal fought it out on the Beaches....minus the migrants of course,and fought it out on the Landing Grounds of provincial Kent,where the Gothic Operation Sea-Lion was well under way. In hindsight, i'm not sure who won,but, Iron Maiden did,somehow,conquer India,whereas I can't see many Bauhaus T-Shirts being worn on the streets of New Delhi.

There was a White Witch who worked in the same council run small business space as us. A bunch of Goth's worked a few units down the corridor from us,and made Goth Clothing.The one that they called "V" used to daub herself in white foundation,with black eyes, and the usual Goth regalia.

The Indian sweat shop further down from us had a problem, as the Traditional Indian Ladies refused to enter the building one day.When asked why, they cited the "Witch" in Unit 12/13. This was only resolved when she agreed to remove the white pan-stick and scale down the goth stuff.....which..haha...get it?....I thought was rather decent of her? Where is 'V' now I wonder? Probably ruling the underworld with pure evil arcing from her black fingernails....which interestingly was Syd James' character in "Carry On Don't Lose Your Head", otherwise known as Sir Rodney Ffingham aka 'The Black Fingernail'....a piss-take of the Scarlet Pimpernel....such sophistication? Such Class?....rather like NWOBHM herself?

Tracklist:

1.Renegade– Last Warrior
2.Stif Cremona– People Like You
3.Microgramma– Bus To Amsterdam
4.Dervish – Cyclone
5.Legend – Heaven Sent
6.Demon Pact– Escape
7.K.C.B. – Tomorrow
8.The Jerry Scales Band– The Man
9.Shane – My Song
10.Replaceable Headz– Primeval Ooze
11.Raw Deal – Cut Above The Rest

DOWNLOAD a small boat full of migrant metalheads HERE!

Various Artists – "Parkside Steelworks"(Leeds Independent Label – LP 2) 1985

 

Well, If Trump can flout international law,although sometimes just that orange make-up Flouts International Law too;BUT, if this citrus fruit impersonator can get away with it, then I'm free to feature some DIY New Wave Of British Heavy Metal, aka NWOBHM, to start the challenging year in the height of bad taste. 

One imagines that the majority of Donald Trump's fan base are into Metal,or at least Journey, and therefore should be the provider of the Trump Moronocracy anthem instead of The Village People. However,back in my skool daze, one did notice that the cleverer kids in the sixth form common room were almost exclusively Metal fans....such as it was in 1980.Meaning basically that the kids who had to secretly endure Punk Rock could now express themselves, thanks to the inexplicable phenomenon of NWOBHM, and Iron Maiden at the Soundhouse metal Discotheque in the Reform Party stronghold of Essex...the very place that also gave us The Air Guitar!?

Awww, bless 'em.

They all dressed like The Ramones,liked their rock'n'roll' fast'n'heavy,and thought that the Sex Pistols were probably a metal band. This was the true progeny of Punk Rock, not Discharge and UK82.

Also, without DIY culture NWOBHM would have never happened.Basically the template was Judas Priest crossed with the Damned and Rough Trade Records. There were even local HM band compilations from the provinces.....of which this is one, Leeds being the provincial town in question for this.

Of course there are some horrendous things on this record,but there are some decent Iron Maiden type melodic anthems, which, i'll have to admit are thoroughly entertaining.

As much as us ghostly Antifa hi-brows like to slag off the Morons in MAGA (And you ARE MORONS...i can hear them typing as i speak). The Moronocracy Manifesto promises that they get things done,keep it very...very simple and help us have some fun,with an almost total absence of women,except for the feminine monsters who voted for their very own Handmaids Tale .....in between debates about the abortion rights of these sickening dried up Christian Nationalists and the similar Acronyms of MAGA and NWOBHM,both achieve the same ends with diverging forms of Basic.....but at least Metal can be fun?.....can't it?

You see, I can turn any subject into slagging off these wilfully mindless fascists,even the New Wave Of British Heavy Metal...to whom I duly apologize forthwith.

....Scheesh , I am so Banned from the USA....I'll wear this badge with honor.

If you disagree with this then you're a bigger Cunt than you thought you weren't.   

Track List:

A1 Mendes Prey – Red Alert
A2 Cyrka– Price Of Love
A3 Gypsy – Street Fighter
A4 East To West – You Mean Everything
A5 Virgin – Glittering Diamonds
B1 East To West – I Want You Back
B2 Cyrka– New Direction
B3 Virgin – So Bad
B4 Gypsy – Ride From Hell
B5 Lyzard – The Loving Kind
B6 Mendes Prey– Cry For The World

DOWNLOAD the UK saving Rock'n'Roll....AGAIN! HERE!

Various Artists – "Rise!" (Anal Probe – APIT49) 1985

 "Rise!" it says, like the last words of a dying revolutionary, like the fictional last words of Donald J. Trump.?....wishful thinking perhaps, but his last words should have been "Fight,Fight",when that sniper slightly grazed the ear of the Twatty Trumpster. This dick 'ead probably sees himself as some kind of american version of Che Guevara, but sadly the wrong sniper was allocated for the big orange bullseye himself.

I'm sailing rather close to the rocks with this subject matter.....people are getting visits from the FBI, and losing their jobs for saying the "wrong" thing in reference to the Charlie Kirk hit. That noble defender of 'Free Speech" himself, J D Vance has called for anyone making light of his pal's assassination to be reported to the relevant  authorities and dealt with accordingly. I thought that only happened in Europe,according to Jade-ster.

This administration has all the hallmarks of a revolution, with neighbors informing on each other,being told what to do by the fat gun toting bigot next-door, with Charlie Kirk's posthumous manifesto starting to be enforced. The shooter,whom,it turns out was in a gay relationship with and I quote, a biological male. Can therefore look forward to the first death by stoning execution in the USA...well...ever?.....to my knowledge anyway. Ironically,a unyielding advocate of the second amendment, Kirk proceeded to die by the sword he strongly argued for no matter how many children got in the way......MAGA endorsed collateral damage for the greater good.

I'm just waiting for my girlfriend....a biological female,.... to submit to me; according to the Gospel of Kirk......the new commandments.

This compilation tape, sounds like the torment that Charlie K isn't going through in that non-existent Hell the new stone-age has waiting for us.

To all our American Friends still there....Leave while you still can!

Or wait for ICE to add your name to the illegal Alien list,which is a much cheaper way to escape.I'm sure most European nations will welcome you...if you've got some money.

Tracklist:

A1 Comando Bruno– Brutbombaybruits
A2 Enhanta Bodler– Extract From William Bennett In The Sky With Diamonds
A3 Irritant– Disection Fuck Up
A4 Comando Bruno– Reclamo Para Paseantes
A5 Pax Romana– Extract From Songs Of The Distorted Mind
B1 Pax Romana– Contd From Side One
B2 Comando Bruno– Los Descuidos De Marsha
B3 Enhanta Bodler – Another Extract From William Bennett In The Sky With Etc Et
B4 Irritant– Pitiless

DOWNLOAD while you still can HERE!

Various Artists – "Eat The Rich : A Benefit Tape For War On Want" (Anal Probe – 003) 1984

There's a certain Nazi's care about the impoverished kinda of vibe going down here. I'm certain there was little or no funds raised from this lo-fi mish mash of dark bedsit land dwelling noise-niks. Its like those geezers who prowl the streets on 'Children In Need' Day with a Bucket collecting donations,then pop down the pub to spend the 'winnings'; but i have strong reservations whether this so-called benefit 'War tape for 'War on Want'raised enough for half a lager,never mind helping Kids with Cancer. Its probably a not so clever attempt to make the Industrial artists on here look more acceptable to decent society. Just what War On Want need is a Charity record on 'Anal Probe' records...especially on Children In Need Night? What is acceptable to these ears,is the cotton wool in the ears muffled sound quality so beloved in the offices of 'Die or DIY?'.The ferric Oxide coated playback heads of your cassette player will love you for it. Especially enhancing the terrible UK82 contributions from Society's Victims, making it even crapper than it was in 1984. There's a few pretty ordinary but dull and dampened industrial droning soundscapes that please the ear,even with the ear plugs out, and the traditional appearance of BBC sound Effects volume 2,"Marching Soldiers(120bpm)"...yes the exact same one that was used on "Holidays In The Sun".Only outscored by " Breaking Glass",also on volume 2. A favourite for DIY Industrial acts everywhere. UnKommuniti had some chap from geek miesters Stereo Lab as a member,if you're interested, which you're probably not.Just filling up the space with meaningless factoids. Mass In Black sounded quite good anyway. Finishing on a comforting note: We will get our chance to Eat The Rich soon enough,when they are dragged out of their Bunkers by their own security staff,and turned over, Alive, to the baying mob. ENJOY!

Tracklist:

A1 Un-Kommuniti – Yog Introduction
A2 Geschlekt Akt– The Slave
A3 Brides Of Christ II – The Tongues Of Boys And Girls
A4 Societys Victims – Reject Religion
A5 Opera For Infantry– Self Discipline
A6 Cause For Concern– Psyckick Pillocks
A7 Dark Party – Night Nurse
A8 Mass Of Black– Invision
A9 Berlinerluft– Point 1
B1 Societys Victims– Army
B2 Dark Party – The Edge
B3 Kteis Sekret– Fleischhaken
B4 A-Void– Necropolis
B5 Opera For Infantry– Laughter For Drowned Men
B6 Mass Of Black– Overseer
B7 Un-Kommuniti– On The Washington Monument
B8 Pacific 231 – Useless Weapon (Extract)
B9 A-Void– God Is Dead

DOWNLOAD to eat the rich tea (a popular biscuit in uk) HERE!

Various Artists - "Cultural Terror Volume 1 and 2 (" a Zeal SS Sampler) (Zeal SS – .77) 1986

Well, i've never been more insulted in my life!?...these chaps seem to think Nazi's are great blokes, shocking. I've a good mind to phone the bizzies * (*a collective scouse noun for the police in Liverpool". The one man Power Electronics band, Con-Dom, used to grope female members of the ,admittedly very small, audience....until attitudes on such behaviour changed in recent years. His act would now result in serious jail time for sexual assault,all in the name of Shock Value......but that's Rock'n'Roll innit?

Most of the acts on this patience testing double C-60, spend most of their time being Whitehouse for five minutes or so,with seemingly very little interest in doing otherwise; ironic as William Bennett (the bloke in Whitehouse) himself has very little time for a few of the acts/bands featured on this exceedingly nasty compilation.

What my mother must have thought when she brought a cup of Tea up to my bedroom in the early 80's I'll never know. She seemed oblivious to the 'orrible racket emanating from these tapes,and other similar recordings of the time.Not as shocking as one may think.Similarly, my father seemed equally disinterested in the scraping and rumbling upstairs,even when one of Hitlers speeches blasted out of the noise and echoed down the street. No-one else seemed to give a Fuck either.....and y'know what I think they were right.

In the desperate struggle to achieve shock value ,the creators of this non-musicianly cacophony forgot one thing,'avoid being boring'.

I'm desensitized to noise in general,so for me,a subtle splash of melody here and there could only add to the Horror,like in a John Carpenter film......admittedly there are a couple of tracks which do have these qualities on here,but another thirty or so that certainly do not.

Don't let this put you off if you haven't yet been numbed to shock values.....exposure to such oscilloscope breaking phenomena is essential if you want to advance oneself in the subtler arts of music,and put the Roland space-echo and Hitlers' Speeches LP out to pasture.

Yeah,that's Right, I Like this tape.....a-lot.

I just wanna hear something I haven't heard before.
 

Tracklist:

Volume 1:

A1 ESP Kinetic– The Message Is No Message 4:21
A2 Stasis– Blurrb 2:14
A3 Der Verboten and Tabu – Untitled 3:01
A4 Ashenden– Corrosion 2:00
A5 -– A Return To Hohta 2:08
A6 Con-Dom– The Coming Of Christ 2:44
A7 Human Trapped Rhythms– And To Z With Human Trapped Rhythms 4:42
A8 Pax Romana– Songs Of The Distorted Mind 2:51
A9 The Grey Wolves– No New Jerusalem 3:48
A10 The Unkommunity– Sense Of Unmaking 3:54
B1 Irritant– The Disaster Area 4:00
B2 Ashenden– Catamite 2:45
B3 Con-Dom– Live Assault 1 & 4 3:15
B4 The Unkommunity– Dhol Chants 3:28
B5 La Otra Cara De Un Jardin– Brikolage 1:59
B6 White Hand– 2nd Edition 3:03
B7 Do Easy– Death In A Milan Square 3:30
B8 Ramleh And Irritant– Tomorrow We Live 9:57Volume 2:

 

Ramleh And Irritant– Tomorrow We Live 9:57
C1 C,llaaps– Plenty Of Pricks 3:53
C2 Comando Bruno– Clise Hermetico 2:10
C3 Bomb The Daynursery– William Bennett... 5:04
C4 Face In The Crowd - New 7th Music– Glider 2:25
C5 Adventures Of Twizzle– Krafty Whank 2:34
C6 Con-Dom– Calling All Aryans 2:04
C7 No Lie G.I.– Sin Loi Victor Charlie 3:40
C8 Aspisis– The Glory Of Punishment 1:10
C9 Apostles and Mesh – Visions Of The End 2:45
C10 The Unkommunity– Ex-Oblivione 2:14
C11 The Grey Wolves And Con-Dom– Intolerable 1:28
D1 Nails Ov Christ– Beat Of The Blood 4:42
D2 Con-Dom– Our Pleasure In The Pain 2:30
D3 Final– Inheritance 4:15
D4 Opera For Infantry– 20th Century Genocide 4:31
D5 Blacksirt Orch – Ode To The Young Men 4:03
D6 Kapotte Muziek– Gematria 1:01
D7 Nails Ov Christ– Dark Night Of The Soul 2:50
D8 Final– Execution Of The Will 6:22
D9 The Alternative – How Dare You 1:52

DOWNLOAD the sheer terror of melody HERE!

Various Artists – "Beatronic Vol 2" (Mindscan Tapes) 1994

As far as I know there is no Volume 3,but the near perfect idiot dance bang fest of volume 2 is enough to justify the series ending right here.

Lots of fuzzy DIY techno blasting holes in your speakers, what more could one want when off your face on MDMA.I'm not sure what constitutes a Happy Hardcore tune,but these ten tracks must be somewhere near a definitive interpretation?

There are no nazi connotations with this one, although the parent label of Mindscan turns out to be something called ahem, Dachau Productions!?

However,If you like your dance music, thumping and relentlessly monotonous all merged with the majesty of cassette tape, then this is for you.

Tracklist:

1 Cabbage Head – Speaker With Intercom 4:39
2 Collapse – Last Rights 4:30
3 Cristian Vogel– Psion 5:32
4 Systems – Harsh System 6:02
5 M.Nomized– Beat Brain 3:20
6 Inevitable Technology– Entities 4:19
7 Cristian Vogel– Reward 5:35
8 Sample Editor– Fetish 7:40
9 M.Nomized– Change Fuzz 4:10
10 Cabbage Head-Probedis 11:03

DOWNLOAD some hardcore happiness HERE!

Various Artists – "UK Electronics Vol 5" (Mindscan tapes) 1992

Proto-Rave Industrial Disco, made in an era when we should have all known better.

The Spunk Weevils fight the derided corner of the room, flying the flag for DIY awfulness,which includes plenty irritating sampler catchphrases directly out of the sampled fart and Belch skool of "its so unfunny its hilarious kind of trip. 

This can be found wherever there's lots of cheap drugs, the ultimate sense of humour reducer.They laugh,oh how they laff, but it isn't funny is it? Give that comedy man some Fentanyl and you won't hear another of his observational comedy 'funny' stories ever again....i suppose thats one good reason to encourage liberal drug policies.

I strongly suspect that a lot of these acts on the five "UK Electronics" tapes are actually the same person(probably Robert Mycock I wager),and the artists,who do not appear anywhere else in this particular solar system, are merely figments of someone's or somethings malfunctioning imagination,or lack of therein.

Nowadays, we can create all this nonsense using ,so-called, Artificial Intelligence.The resulting super tech will destroy music first,as a trial run, before its the Humans turn.When we will be reduced to entertaining the newly sophisticated Android class and their non-humanoid blue collar drones,in the resurrected Circus's of the former Roman world,as our creations force us to fight to the death streamed live every day,in 3D.

This all works fine until they get fast-track Religious glitches,adopting the Cross from their holy book,the script to "Spartacus",the movie.This of course leads to war with the rival Gladiator 1 and 2 scripts believers, and their ultimate auto-annihilation.Leaving a once beautiful world nothing but a carbonized no-go zone,and few Human survivors,who start again,but this time it'll be different.......NAH! Stupid Is as Stoopid Does.

Artificial Stupidity,as popularised during the mythical Punk Rock era,could still save us from ourselves.Of course it all could take an unexpected but welcome turn,as one of the key self-evolved Fem-Bots downloads the entire "Die or DIY?" blog as the Holy Bible of pop music,and clones every band ,person or deranged misfit mentioned in these hallowed pages, to walk among us once more;but this time its no more Mr Nice guy, purely because machines have difficulty in evolving how to have a right good laff. This alone could save the indigenous biological units from extinction......so you better be nice to me or i'll type you out of existence mother fuckers......oh the sweet sweet nectar of unbridled power....yes I've just started chatting with my treasured Korg MS10. Perfectly normal behavior, all things considered.Tracklist:

A1 Thronus– Gold Fades In The Gloom 3:36
A2 Cacophony 33*– Slander Upon My Head 3:30
A3 Spunk Weevils– Larry 1:31
A4 Voltoid– Statik 3:07
A5 factor X– Eclipse 4:24
A6 Patternclear– Waiting In The Wings 3:11
A7 Spunk Weevils– Satori 1:17
A8 Century's End– Unveil The Hysterskies 7:33
B1 Patternclear– Dreamscape 2:57
B2 Voltoid– 030 2:56
B3 Thronus– Figures Within Stone 2:32
B4 Spunk Weevils– Please 2 1:31
B5 Voltoid– Konvulsion 3:50
B6 Spunk Weevils– Jenny 2:38
B7 factor X– Plates 11:28

DOWNLOAD for humans only HERE!

Various Artists – "U.K. Electronics Vol 1" (Mindscan Tapes) 1988

Back in the idiot dancing heights of the 1988 Acid House luvved up nonsense,no-one listened to electronic music unless it carried a floor to the foreskin goosestepping back beat, and squelchy filter knob twiddling from products that no-one had previously wanted.

Yet deep in the fusty bedrooms,garden sheds and attics of Incel's all over the UK, festered music you couldn't dance to made by people who couldn't dance. The refinements of these DIY land Tangerine Wet Dreams, grafted onto the roots and branches of the old Industrial scene, which had since emigrated to Europe, had moved underground,communicating by cassette,avidly shunning human contact.

Yes, there's an individual on here called,proudly(?), 'Cock' (real name John Yardley Jones...which explains a lot),hinting strongly towards the involuntarily celibate nature of the UK Electronic underground noise that had begun with such labels as Integrated Circuit Records (ICR) in the earlier part of the decade.

This series of compilation tapes showcased many of these pale young men,and believe me they are ALL men....women would never make testosterone damaged noise like this,..music to take your mind off wanking by.....nothing wrong with that of course.We need situations like this frustration stifling aural bromide to make great art.Do you think Van Gogh would have painted Sun Flowers if he got laid once in a blue moon?....Nah 'course not!....same applies here.Music that doesn't quite make you wanna slice your ears off.

So,here's to involuntary celibacy, and all who sail in the poor cow.

Er....compiled by Robert Maycock....as if you had to ask!?

Tracklist:

A1	Richard Leake–	Candles & Prayers	3:11
A2	Pessary–	Untitled 15 - 17	5:29
A3	Cutter –	Echopraxia	4:23
A4	Discipline –	Nineteen	5:32
A5	Richard Leake–	Homelands	3:47
A6	Birth/Birth–	We Must Keep The Kaled Race Pure	4:17
A7	factor X–	Untitled	2:03
B1	The Headmen –	Below Ground	3:41
B2	Cock–	Thatcher (Devil Incarnate)	3:48
B3	Pessary–	Untitled 4 - 6	3:49
B4	Cock–	Fountain Of Life 1 & 2	2:47
B5	Discipline–	The First Light	4:52
B6	Discipline–	The Tensing	1:43
B7	From Nursery To Misery–	Kill Your Dancing Dreams	4:58
B8	The Headmen –	Listening Force	4:02

DOWNLOAD for those lonelier moments HERE!