Thursday 12 November 2020

Ask Dr. Stoopid - "Mommy, What's a Krautrock?"


 I'm trying to keep myself amused during my Co-vid confinement,and also combat a spell of apathy about blogging.....so......having watched three and a half seasons of "Ren and Stimpy"(the greatest TV show ever made!?),my mind is sufficiently out-there/damaged to ask Dr. Stoopid what Krautrock really is shall we?
Dr. Stoopid says:

"Basically, Krautrock was a low grade version of 'Prog Rock', but for people who couldn't play musical instruments.....and specifically for anyone who lived in West Germany who couldn't play a musical instrument;even more specifically,anyone who lived in West Germany who couldn't play a musical instrument between 1969 and 1975.
The main Krautrockers,who actually 'Rocked',and these fellows were in a minority, were Ash Ra Tempel,Amon Düül II.....but NOT Amon Düül I,who were psychedelic hippy primitivists......and Guru Guru. These chaps were the rock element of it all,preferring Jimi Hendrix-style freak outs to wanting to be Pink Floyd at the UFO in 1967. Of course, no real musical talent is needed to play an impression of Jimi Hendrix,who was an innovator on the six strings rather than a fantastic technician.
The large majority of German hippies wanted to be Pink Floyd,who weren't too hot on the musician front themselves. The Syd Barratt Live era from 1966 to 68 was a huge inspiration on the 'Freak Out' front,where the boundaries of Rock traditionalism were completely broken down into free-form freak rock. Then the next era of Pink Floyd,post Syd, was even more influential on the nascent Kraut Rockers.They used syths,and floaty effects.The Space Rock era Floyd.
Being Outsiders, the Krautrockers were, by default, given free reign artistically,because they thought nobody beyond our mates are gonna be interested in this shit? Surely? Never mind buy the records?
How wrong were they?
They didn't count on the endless ingenuity of 'The Record Collector' to create a market to inflate the prices,creedence and obcurity of any second rate genre to boost their kudos in this musical version of Trainspotting.In this world, Obscurity and rarity ruled over musical excellence or innovation. The same thing happened to Soul music in the cess-pits of north western England in the seventies with 'Northern Soul'.....which was really the 'Crap Soul' that nobody bought.These things were rare for a reason,and for the vast majority of Krautrock it was the same.
Naturally there was some genuinely great and innovative music to be dug up, like Neu!,Can,Cluster and,maybe, Faust,but, com'on,most were poor facsimiles of Anglo-prog.There was even a Krautrock band who wasn't even German; the Canterbury style bunch of Brits called Nektar,who incidentally could actually play their instruments.
The best stuff to come out of the Krautrock era was the electronic stuff,which should really be referred to, not as rock,but Das Kosmiche Musik, or, space rock with out the rock bit.Again this didn't require any great musical expertise,but ownership of a vast bank of modular synthesisers, and a couple of Terry Riley LP's.We're talking Popol Vuh, Cluster,and Tangerine Dream here fella's.....and it is only Fella's who listen to this stuff.The ladies are less inclined to listen to anything that may enhance their stature in the tribe,and go for mostly stuff they actually like.
It's debatable whether Tangerine Dream should actually be associated with the rest of Krautrock/Kosmiche musik,as they seemed to exist apart from all that,and would have made the charts in the UK no matter what. As for Kraftwerk,they binned off Krautrock altogether to nobley try and invent some futuristic Pop that also charted in the UK. CAN also existed in that hinterland of accessibility that overlapped Roxy Music territory minus the songs.
For me, there was only one Kraut act that sounded like nothing else that went before,and that was ,of course, Neu!.This was one of those 'What The Fuck Was That' moments that are all too rare in the rock'n'roll era.
Doesn't that drummer play the same pattern on all of the tracks?...er...Yes. Where were the fills,the paradiddles,the 7/5 time signatures? This was NOT Prog!
Probably the greatest influence Krautrock had was not the music, it was the inclusivity of the musicianship.Wait a minute I can play Bass like Holgar Czukay,play drums like Klaus Dinger,and guitar like that bloke from Guru Guru, said the impressionable youth of 1973,having just pilfered the 'European Rock' section of the local record store.
The Euro Rock section was still there in 1978 when i first bought into the Krautrock legend,after endlessly hearing my Post-Punk hero's name-dropping CAN and Neu.Sadly "Tago-Mago" wasn't there, so I got the terrible "Soon Over Babaluma",which was, let's face it...Shit.Although,there will certainly be comments alluding to the opposite. Luckily I fell upon an original pressing of "Neu 1",on Brain Records, in a subterranean hippy record store in Leicester called "The Very Bazaar",from which i spent most of my dole money in in the early eighties. The Euro-Rock section was in Revolver in Leicester market place,which was renouned for its genre spanning sections;the other notorious section in Revolver was the "New Wave" section,where you could find anything from The Drones to The Door and The Window residing there.
When David Bowie was looking for Idea's, as he was inclined to do,often mistaking 'looking' for 'Stealing',he was pointed in the direction of The Motorik section(as in the Neu/Motorik Beat) of the Krautrock genre by fellow 'Ideas' harvester,and fellow non-musician,Brian Eno,or 'Eno', as his mother calls him (Eno,yer dinner's ready!).So...er... Eno,with sidekicks Bowie and Pop (iggy),would hang-out with Harmonia,Cluster,Conny Plank,and the Dingers casually usurping their style for a series of rather unremarkable albums to enhance Bowies legend,including the terminally awful "The Idiot" by Iggy Pop...who wants us to know he,or David's read some Dostoevsky.Luckily,as no-one had heard of Neu or Harmonia in the Anglo-Saxon arena,or even in Germany for that matter;this watered down Motorik influenced Kosmiche Pop was attributed to the Great David,who to his credit would often drop these groups names subtly,to the deaf ears of the Anglo-American public.
Most of it is,like every other genre,over-rated and dross, valued for its obscurity over content. Leave a copy of the admittedly rather good,"Golem" by Sand on your coffee table,and you'll score many obscurity points with the envious eyes that your geek friend Eamonn would cast upon it...That's the Eamonn who changed his name to Aemonn Düül in tribute to his favourite Band.Then of course, there was his quieter namesake, Aemonn Düül Too,who was Aemonn Düül One's shadow world. If these people don't exist there is a need to invent them.
So to close this contentious article on German musik at the start of the seventies,its a Geek tradition to have a Top Five list innit?

1. Neu - "Neu!"
2. CAN - "Ege Bamyasi"
3. Cluster - "Zukerzeit"
4. Harmonia - "Musik Von Harmonia"
5. Guru Guru - "UFO"

All pretty obvious selections,but Obscurity in itself is not a guide izzit?
I assume you've all got these albums? Si I'll provide a download of Sand's "Golem" album......which you've probably all got as well,but its more obscure than my Top Five,and is therefore more 'Krautrock as a result.

Epilogue:
Ok, Yeah Jaki Liebzeit was an incredible drummer,and NO, Einsturzende Neubauten was not a Krautrock band,even if they did steal banging metal junk and using engines from Faust.That's immitation not innovation.And no Ash Ra (Tempel) didn't invent Trance."

Sand  ‎– "Golem" (1974)




Tracklist:

1.Helicopter 13:40
2.The Old Loggerhead 8:20
3.May Rain 4:30
4.On The Corner 4:30
5.Sarah (10:40)


42 comments:

Anonymous said...

Penis

rex said...

And "kraut" is an offensive term. That would be like calling
Merzbow, and Acid Mothers Temple Gookrock. Somehow, there was never any uproar or push-back. I guess because that was before hashtags.

Jonny Zchivago said...

Acid Mothers is often called Jap-Rock, and Merzbow Jap-Noise.
Yeah i get ever so offended whenever someone calls english music Limey-Rock...not.
Krautrock is a ridiculous term anyway as not much Krautrock actually Rocks. But it stuck and krautrockers Faust did a song using this offensive word.

Jonny Zchivago said...

Hi anonymous,i bet you've been sitting on your inflatable
hemorrhoid cushion,in front of your computer, twiddling thumbs in between wanks for 10 days to type 'Penis' on my next post. Within a couple of hours you were there, like a shit stain you can't wash out.

Anonymous said...

Hi JZ,
Great Top 5...hard to disagree with. However, 'the terminally awful "The Idiot" by Iggy Pop'..wow, that's a massive call. One of the greatest for me!
Keep up the good though. Love the blog, always entertaining and thought provoking.
PB

mikey said...

I read this article, infected with COVID, sitting in my living room wearing an Ash Ra Tempel t-shirt like the poseur that I am. That Sand album is indeed very good. Nice write-up. Cheers from the States

rex said...

I should have put wuotes around "offensive". I agree with you. Faust was smart to do that. Is that why David Lowery called his band "Cracker". Also despite your peremptory warning to not defend Babaluma, I suddenly realized how much I like the last cut, "Quantum Physics". It's the edited improvisation that was probably just a continuation of their recording of "Chain Reaction". And I like those same bits in Chain Reaction. You can hear where the edits are made, making it even better.
Penis, my good man.

Luca said...

Big fan of Sand,also one of the members were in a really great band called Alu(again, memory doesn't serve me well here)but I know that the Licht album was great(in my opinion anyway).

PS what the fuck is with the whole Penis thing?!

Jonny Zchivago said...

Hey, Mikey with Co-Vid....i guess you're one of the post election lame duck Co-Vid wave that's sweeping the states right now. I dunno if you can buy Ash Ra Tempel face masks,but that may be an idea? Get well soon,and feel proud that you're doing your bit for Herd Immunity.
Keep up the posing.

Jonny Zchivago said...

Hi PB, i may revisit The Idiot as i haven't heard it with fresh ears since i formed my opinion....but i hated it when i played it. Ian Curtis's last played record gives its some poignancy i guess?

Jonny Zchivago said...

@Rex...I don't think Babaluma is that bad,just a bad place to start if you wanna get into CAN. As i bought it when i was a penniless teenager, i did persevere with it,and now i have a nostalgic twang when i play it....but not representative of CAN's best work at all, like a different group.
Penis indeed.

Jonny Zchivago said...

@ Luca...maybe Penis is a great lost Sand album yet to be unearthed?...not heard Alu however...will correct this glaring ommision.

Bambi said...

Great article, and I agree with most of what you say. I'll have to check out Guru Guru. Thanks for the Sand, unknown to me, will enjoy checking it out.
Keep on doing what you're doing, I cannot understand what is wrong with anonymous, but there is something wrong with him (and it will be a him), maybe he is a really disturbed and sad individual.

Bambi said...

also thanks for Guru Guru, UFO too, 2019 link still active.

tsanakas said...

BEST KRAUTROCK ALBUMS ARE THE

FAUST (1)
AMON DUUL II WOLF CITY
KRAFTWERK TRANS EUROPE EXPRESS
CLUSTER 71
CAN EGE BAMYASI
CONRAD SCHNITZLER CONAL & CON 3
POPOL VUH VARIOUS SOUNDTRACKS
ROEDELIUS VARIOUS SOLO
MOEBIUS VARIOUS SOLO

WORST GROUPS

NEU!
ETC. ETC.

CHRISTOS TSANAKAS

Jonny Zchivago said...

hahaha Wolf City?/?
Like it or not, Neu are thee most influential group in Krautrock.
And universally Zukerzeit is the most influential Cluster record...personal teates aside this is a fact.
Glad you agree on CAN. All Kraftwerk's albums are debatable as for their originality and influence....but mostly Nothing to do with Kraurtrock whatsoever.
Kluster however gave birth to Industrial music..that is beyone dispute.
Faust?...relevant in 1972,due to budget virgin releases,but now it sounds shit...especially the albums that followed.
Howvecver be as obscure as you want, the top five i gave is IT!.
I'm pissed amd my mate had brought more beer so laters.

tsanakas said...

NEU! is, at least, the worst group I have ever encountered in my whole long synth-life!
They always serve the nothing as something. EVERY SINGLE MINUTE of their stupidity
is a waste of time!

Jonny Zchivago said...

Cheers Bambi, My german friend in France drove into a tree and died, and at his funeral his sister told me that the drummer of guru guru tried to get in her pants. I said UFO was my fav German album...not true,and it didn't allow me in her pants. But at least we could talk about how good tHe Pentangle were instead.

Jonny Zchivago said...

@ tsanakas synth-life..or death...says it all....if you were a muscian or even a non-musician, you'd understand. Careful who you call 'stupid'

tsanakas said...

So fake NEU! - NO NEW/NO NEWS AT ALL in their music,
that subhuman kind of dead stupids' soundshadow, pretending to be
orgasmic (ha ha ha) "rock"(ask Chrome or SPK or Nekropolis to know what neu-rock music is about. This fake-new NEU!-thing triend too much to pretend that this cheap, uninspired and mindless music was indeed... music and, what a germanik fanfare, a NEU one (LOL).

badgerstump said...

First off ... Neu! as the worst band? Hallogallo is one of the highest peaks of human achievement ffs. Wolf City as one of the best LPs? At least he didn't try to defend Tangerine Dream I suppose.

Fuck me, the brain is wasted on some people and clearly Trump is to blame for so much more than I ever suspected. Please can somebody pass that person a pillow and a strong human prepared to press it down onto his face for a sufficient and necessary period of time?

Now to the next self-evident truth ... Ren & Stimpy is the best TV show ever made. It just is. Sorry ... IS!

If it was a top 10, I'd be throwing in Amon Düül's "Paradieswärts Düül" and "Psychedelic Underground" in that order ... different styles to your top five but really good (and much better than the later Amon Düül II stuff ... although the first two are pretty good). The first two Ash Ra Tempel LPs are really good but "Join Inn" is on a different planet. I could make a case for Popol Vuh's "In Den Gärten Pharaos" and "Affenstunde". Guru Guru's "Hinten" is nicely fucked up and the first Faust LP is very WTF but probably works better if you don't hate Mothers Of Invention but c'mon who does (but tbh everything Faust recorded up to 1973 is essential and then you can take your pick). The first two Kraftwerk LPs are great but after that? Jog on! The rest of it isn't Krautrock ... it's pastiche and marketing or people who went to the German equivalent and wished they could be in Yes.

Oh sorry ... top five you say ... I got distracted.

badgerstump said...

Oh ... and can I just add: Penis

Thanks, I've not felt the need to add my penis to anything for a long time and I'm grateful for the opportunity.

Softshoebanana said...

There's me thinking that it was a joint made out of toilet paper....thank god for your explanation.

Anonymous said...

Dear Mr Z,

yes, the Ren & Stimpy Show is definitly one of the best Tv programs ever, next to the Avengers, (classic)Star Trek, Raumpatrouille Orion and the Prisoner.

Back in the late ninties I was in this record shop in Camden Town looking for vinyl prey when they played the complete Tago Mago Album at full volume. That made me feel welcome and I felt even better when, by the time we got to the track called "Aumgn", these guys looking in the Brit Pop compartment finally lost their patience and quietly cursed the staff for playing this "fucking noise".

I always wondered how the term Krautmusic came up. Obviously it wasn`t meant to be flattering. It astonished me that critics in the Uk took notice of german Pop music at all. One might find the term Krautrock offensive, but it could have been worse. How about Hunsrock? :)

I quiete like Babaluma except for the horrible last track on side one. I love Quantum Physics. It sounds though as if they took an extended excerpt of rhythm improvisation, looped it and then added the keyboard.

Neu were great, though I think the invention of the so called Motorik Beat was not an artistic descision but a lack of skills. But, who cares, combined with the great non Rock/Blues guitar of Michael Rother it gave us timeless beauty. Coincidence plays an important part in art.

You can find the almost complete oeuvre of Alu in the Tape Attack blog. Especially the recordings with the female vocalist are worth a listen.

I`m not that fond of Guru Guru because of the heavy guitar, but Mani Neumeier, the drummer, made a nice album together with Dieter Moebius and Conni Plank in ´81. A friend of mine used to play it at 45 rpm to make sound like a Drum Bass record.

Thanks again for your eloquent and highly entertaining comments which lighten up our everyday life in these dark times.

Happy happy joy joy
(I envy you for the posession of all episodes of the Ren and Simpy Show)

Herr A



Anonymous said...

Oh @tsanakas, if you don't get Neu! then it's your loss I'm afraid.
I totally agree with JZ on his point that they are indeed the most influential group in Krautrock - and head and shoulders above the rest, imho.

Re: Faust - IV and So Far are both really jolly fine records, so I'd surely extend the Faust best period to 1974....golden years, gold whop whop whop.

The Idiot is always worth a revisit for sure, JZ. One of my most played albums ever, I'd have to say (though still well behind Neu!1). Maybe you won't get to that point but any advance on 'terminally awful' is a good thing in my books!

Enjoyable yarn, one and all...
PB

Jonny Zchivago said...

Dear Herr A,
I too am a original series Star Trek nut, The Prisoner too, and of course The Avengers (not the marvel comic nonsense)....got the Hots for Tara King just to be different, But never got into Raumpatrouille apart from the soundtrack....can't talky german can I?

Have you seen 'Fire Dogs 2'? One of Ren and Stimpy's lost episodes?
Its a classic....i may put it on YouTube. I did a Star Treky post here in fact....do you reach me Herbert? https://dieordiy2.blogspot.com/2014/01/clock-dva-texas-chainsaw-massacre-self.html



Jonny Zchivago said...

What Badgerstump said.....never has a man been so correct.

badgerstump said...

well, yeah obviously

but my new issue is that Softshoebanana seems to think that my penis is a joint made out of toilet paper

happy for people to take a toke but i draw the line at people sparking it up ... even I have standards. no, i do. really.

parmalee said...

Funny how the slightly more obscure stuff never really holds up. It'd be great if Siloah were one of the greats, but, well, they're just not. Gila's records hold up, but the second one is essentially just Popol Vuh doing something completely different. With Sand/Golem I always forget which is the band and which is the album title--and was Lee Hazlewood in any way involved? But generally, it's more like you stumble upon an obscurity and it's the best thing you've ever heard for all of five minutes, then you've completely forgotten about it.

parmalee said...

And the best thing about Wolf City is the track "Wolf city"--wolf city, wolf city, hilarious!

parmalee said...

One final remark: if Amon Duul (I) were all playing 12-strings instead of 6-strings, you'd basically have early Genesis.

Anonymous said...

Covid confinement is for cunts like you.
Suck that CCP cock useful idiot.

Jonny Zchivago said...

AHAaaa...USFUL IDIOT...SOMEONES BEEN READING CONSPIRACY THEORIES HAVEN'T THEY?
I think we just heard from the REAL Dr. Stupid himself.

Anonymous said...

Vagina

rev.b said...

Oh, I've heard zillions of bands worse than Neu! Hang in there tsanakas, we'll get to 'em... That said, side 2 of Neu! 2 is the most inspiring chunk of vinyl ever pressed, ain't it?

Bambi said...

Thanks for the Sand d/l, rather enjoyed that one, but Guru Guru ufo, I didn't like so much.
Oh look anon has posted another funny comment. Anon how about using a humorous name, may I suggest Wiggins.

Anonymous said...

He knows we defected Jonny! Quick send the signal ! Play that Gookrock!

Anonymous said...

Kraut is okay to say. It isn't offensive because you consider yourself white. Also Hitler, Nazis and dead Jews holmes. Not everyone has forgotten that yet. Japan gets a pass as they got one of the bombs that had been built for you. I think you can live with kraut you big baby. Let us know when launch WWIII until then sit down kraut! ☻

Anonymous said...

I'm going to defect to the CCP I think. I will make a rad white slave. How do you say 'i suck cock better than biden' in Mandarin?

Sven Hoek said...

Never mind the Krautrock - Ren and Stimpy is the best thing ever!!!

Anonymous said...

I was once listening to that Sand record while on some hallucinogenic and it sounded like a helicopter was flying around (probably due to the first song "Helicopter"). That helicopter sound just went on and on and on throughout the whole album (and it seemed like it was a really long record). I finally looked over at the stereo to find that the album had ended (probably some time before that) and all I was listening to was the sound of the fan in my room. Krautrock.....

Great blog. Glad you're back (yes I now realize it has been several months since you've been back).

Jonny Zchivago said...

I was listening to Sand coming up on some very strong tea,tea bag left in, once, and couldn't figure that Helicopter sound...especially when i stopped playing the record...it continued.Then i noticed the Helicopter in my back yard.Crazy times.
Best Helicopter song in Pop?
Thats easy...Helicopter Honeymoon by The Scrotum Poles of course